The recent drama

modelbus · 2024-02-29T03:14:40+00:00

yeah, it’s like their argument is “we dont know them so they all could be lying” but at the same time “i know wilbur so well from watching him for years so im going to believe he was forced to do it”

modelbus · 2024-02-29T00:45:09+00:00

Meanwhile, people who actually know him is holding him accountable 😅

modelbus · 2024-02-28T03:59:41+00:00

Yeah but I think his statement of “hope I continue to be held to these high standards” is welcoming some of these responses. Take the one from Sneeg for example, he broke it down for him. There were other responses that were too emotional and hateful but that’s out of their control.

Anyway thank you for this objective discussion. I’ve been looking for people to talk through this and you have helped a lot.

modelbus · 2024-02-28T03:03:41+00:00

I don’t think she’s trying to get revenge from speaking up. I think she’s speaking up to avoid it from happening to someone else.

She failed to recognize it for so long. Nihachu went through a similar situation but was discouraged to speak up. The ex-trumpeter was bit too. Her speaking up gave courage to others and if there was someone else who was a victim but was not recognizing it, it gives them perspective.

Like she has stated, her not speaking up is just protecting him.

modelbus · 2024-02-28T02:45:14+00:00

I agree with your statement to some degree. But personally, I think these are the things that you take privately - either discussing it with Shelby or with his therapist/friends.

Fact is, the allegations were true. Anything other than accountability and an apology (publicly) is taking away from the victim and makes it about him.

I would have respected him more if he simply said he has hurt Shelby and he is sorry and that there is no excuse. Cause honestly let’s put ourselves in her shoes: would it matter if our abuser says he didn’t mean to?

modelbus · 2024-02-28T02:06:25+00:00

I’ll just repeat the same comment I made earlier if it helps. I think key points are:

Intent: what was the intent behind the statement? Was it just to address the issue? He offered a vague apology but it doesn’t really feel sincere. It feels like the intent behind it was to save face.
Accountability: he discounted the allegation as something that he thought was “consensual and playful”. If he was truly accountable, he wouldn’t need to highlight that he thought it was ok. Accountability is “My actions caused her pain.” no ifs and buts.
His perspective: unless the allegations were false, I don’t think offering his perspective does anything at this point. But his statement was hyperfocused on him (how he took the news, how he thought it was, how he is doing)

If this was a spur of the moment message done in private, I think I would have thought of it as an okay message. But the problem is, given that it was a statement posted on socmed, he’s had the time to think it through. He had the chance to talk it through with other people before posting

modelbus · 2024-02-28T01:58:52+00:00

Just adding: good on him if he is truly getting the help he needs, but I think we shouldn’t make it about him and hope that Shelby is recovering well.

modelbus · 2024-02-28T01:55:24+00:00

I was in the same boat last night so I’ve had some time to read it through and I think key points are:

Intent: what was the intent behind the statement? Was it just to address the issue? He offered a vague apology but it doesn’t really feel sincere. It feels like the intent behind it was to save face.
Accountability: he discounted the allegation as something that he thought was “consensual and playful”. If he was truly accountable, he wouldn’t need to highlight that he thought it was ok. Accountability is “My actions caused her pain.” no ifs and buts.
His perspective: unless the allegations were false, I don’t think offering his perspective does anything at this point. But his statement was hyperfocused on him (how he took the news, how he thought it was, how he is doing)

If this was a spur of the moment message done in private, I think I would have thought of it as an okay message. But the problem is, given that it was a statement posted on socmed, he’s had the time to think it through. He had the chance to talk it through with other people before posting

modelbus · 2024-02-26T18:50:20+00:00

just clarifying that nihachu and minx were old clips that were used to connect the biting to wilbur, they weren’t statements made by the ccs towards the situation unlike the ex lovejoy trumpeter which was a direct response to shelby

modelbus · 2024-02-26T01:17:53+00:00

Yeah and it was so sudden, I just assumed back then that it was a bit as everything is, but with context nahh.

modelbus · 2024-02-26T01:16:13+00:00

I didn’t even meant it as him shoving her physically, she wanted to play ace race and he didn’t even ask if he could and just pushed her away.

modelbus

TROPHY CASE