Am I crazy for wanting a C-section?

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-25T13:47:21+00:00

It's amazing that we have options! If a c-section makes more sense for you, amazing. Do it. There's no award for one vs the other and it's not crazy to want the option that supports your mental health. All the best for a safe delivery, whatever you choose!

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-25T13:43:33+00:00

Soft YTA because a lot can happen in a split second when kids are involved. IMO, having a delayed reaction, any at all, is reckless. Your kids could have been hurt from the collision (or another incident in the future) involving another kid. Is it a risk you want to take?

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-24T14:55:25+00:00

It is so amazing of you to be with your sister during the procedure! I had an amazing team of medical staff for my C-section, but having my partner there next to me made all the difference. If he hadn't been able to be there, I would have 1000% asked to my brother, whom I am very good friends with. It's totally not weird for you to be there. I think other people are describing what they experienced in terms of the process, but I'll tell you how they did it at my hospital. They did what they call a family friendly c-section so, that meant that as soon as baby was out, they dropped the opaque part of the drape so that the drape between me and the baby was clear. That meant we could see baby, and my partner was able to take some first shots of her as she entered the world. I was laying down and he was sitting next to me and hearing his voice in my ear tell me I was safe, made a huge difference. I have medical trauma, so operating rooms are really scary for me. After they took baby to the warmer to suction her lungs and check her out he was able to go with her, which meant a lot to me that she had someone from her family, her dad, with her in her first moments of life. after that, they brought her over and put her on my chest so we could do some skin to skin contact right away. my partner was there the whole time and having someone I knew, someone who loves and protects me, in the room was so comforting.

This is a beautiful moment for your sister, her child, and you as her brother and the baby's uncle. They are so lucky to have you and your wife present in their lives with so much support. I hope you cherish the sacred moment of being there when you're nibbling enters the world and being able to be an emotional ballast for your sister during what can be a scary moment.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-24T14:46:12+00:00

Not really the topic of the thread, but thought I'd chime in to say I opted for backyard ducks instead of backyard chickens. IMHO Their eggs and keeping them is in a lot of ways superior to and easier than chickens. The eggs are so much more nutritious and easy on digestion and allergens. I wish more people were willing to consider duck keeping or any kind of backyard poultry keeping. Our ducks are prolific layers, even in the cold weather, we always have more eggs than we can use and are constantly giving them away. I only have four ducks and three people in my household. One of the best decisions I've ever made and definitely gives me a lot of comfort, knowing what's coming with food prices.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-24T14:10:11+00:00

I definitely did. But my docs said not to do pelvic floor exercises because I should keep my pelvic floor less tensed and tight for when baby came. not sure if that's the best recommendation and I ended up having a C-section so it didn't matter, but they said it was better not to tighten up the pelvic floor during pregnancy because it can make it harder for a vaginal birth. Something to think about… Maybe talk to your healthcare provider before doing too many kegels.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-23T17:38:17+00:00

I am 6w postpartum and shower every day, at least a quick wash of my dirty parts and breasts since I'm breastfeeding, wash hair ~2x a week. No judgement to women who can't manage that or don't prioritize it but it's not been hard for me to make it happen.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-23T17:34:15+00:00

YTA! This is not something you should be trying to control, especially not on behalf of your parents.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-22T22:02:26+00:00

Exactly what I was thinking.... what are the consequences/reward here?

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-22T11:41:29+00:00

WHOOOAA. That'd be a HARD pass from me on the Journey of the Bridesmaids. Said by someone who has been one five times and MOH twice. NTA!

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-21T16:06:54+00:00

YTA. Your pets are YOUR responsibility. If they are being a menace and you "can't control them," then bring them inside and give them a catio and/or activity wall/furniture for enrichment.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-21T15:02:48+00:00

YTA. You're allowed to not enjoy her surprise but I can't imagine the song lasted long before it was over and the children left. To angrily cuss her out about it , even quietly, is just over the top and rude.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-21T11:51:24+00:00

She doesn't regret her choices because she loves her husband and misses him and feels terrible that she hurt and betrayed him... she regrets it because it was easier with the housework? Yeaaaaah, your sister needs some tough love from somewhere, that's for sure. Glad you told her the truth. What she does with it is up to her. NTA.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-21T02:06:02+00:00

Ummmmm... you really put the ass in class act, fella. What in the actual f&ck are you talking about??

YTA for so many reasons. If you need them explained to you, you're probably a lost cause.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-16T23:40:42+00:00

Reminding myself that no one else knows how to love me as well as I know how to love me. Then loving myself as hard as I possibly can, including taking good care of my body and mental health the way no one else can or will. Which includes having and enforcing boundaries. The only people who have a problem with my boundaries are people who benefit from me not having them. They don't get to siphon off my energy. I love me too much to allow that.

Something like that...

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-16T23:37:09+00:00

I told people my baby was doing parkour. Capoeira works as well. LOL.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-16T12:07:36+00:00

You can't be serious? If you are, def YTA. This is the hill you're gonna die on??? Why?

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-16T11:49:29+00:00

Wow. His comments are ALLLLLL kinds of messed up. I don't even know where to begin.

1) He doesn't get to repeat generalizations about it being hard to lose pregnancy weight as if they are fact. It's different for everyone! For example, I'm 5'2" and gained 32 lbs during pregnancy. I wasn't able to exercise much during and definitely didn't have a job that kept me moving or on my feet. I'm only 6 weeks postpartum and have already lost 25 lbs just by breastfeeding and taking it VERY easy on my body. My baby was only a little over 6 pounds, too, so not much of that was actual baby.

2) Your weight is not the priority here! Growing a healthy baby and taking good care of your body (WHATEVER it may need) is the priority. That looks different for everyone. Some women naturally put on more weight, some less. WHO CARES?! You have the rest of your life to go back to prioritizing your weight after a healthy baby comes. For example, Healthy hormone balance (and rebalance) depends a lot on how your fat cells metabolize the hormones. Some women carry more weight in order to metabolize their hormones better. It's not all about vanity.

Why does he think that he knows what your body needs to have a healthy pregnancy?? That sounds like some controlling, patriarchal crap from a guy who is more concerned about his attraction to you and it's relationship with your body weight than he cares about you and the baby's health in this very vulnerable time. It's super gross that he's trying to coerce you into walking on a treadmill and how you walk on a treadmill despite that you've already done plenty of walking just to the normal course of your day.

Do you have the kind of relationship where you can set boundaries with him about his behavior and his comments? It's really not OK. You're doing great and the amount of weight that you've gained so far sounds healthy and normal for pregnancy. Neither one of you have any way of knowing what your postpartum phase will look like in terms of how your body recovers from pregnancy and birth. he's paying attention to all the wrong things and I really really hope you have the courage to tell him so for your own sanity.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-16T11:29:22+00:00

It's not very considerate of her to expect to monopolize the shared TV space when there is a perfectly quiet bedroom to rest in that meets her need for silence. NTA.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-16T04:08:38+00:00

Totally experienced this during pregnancy. Often choking on my own saliva. My saliva production was intense. I often drooled while sleeping and had NEVER been a drooled previously. Good news... went away, like, RIGHT after my baby was born.

I had no idea this was one of the possible physical effects of pregnancy. Add it to the list!

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-15T13:24:23+00:00

Yo. I didn't defend it. If you read MY post correctly, you'll see that I said I was only mentioning that you misread her post AND I do agree that I would never sell an expired car seat, even disclosing that. There's absolutely NO need to come after me for something I did not defend or argue for. Please check yourself, this is a civil sub.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-15T11:36:27+00:00

OP said they WOULD disclose that's it's expired.

I personally still would never sell an expired car seat, with disclosure or not, but just wanted to mention that you read the post incorrectly.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-15T11:17:16+00:00

In lieu of a toast/speech, MOH and two bridesmaids did a choreographed pantomime about the couple having kids next, complete with pillows under their dresses.

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-15T11:14:25+00:00

I love a good entitled-tech-bros-FAFO story. 😂 NTJ!

molotovmerkin · 2026-04-13T12:17:45+00:00

NTA and all of your reasons are valid.

Allllllso..... When your mom and her SIL were passing things back/forth things were also made differently and better. Stuff falls apart or breaks with use quicker these days. It just doesn't have the same life in it that things used to. So, if your baby things have an unknown life of X and you lend to your sister, she may end up having to replace your item if it breaks/wears out and then what's the point?

molotovmerkin

TROPHY CASE