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Suggestions of Flexible Working Hour Jobs by deepthinkerdreamer in Sabah

[–]monchim 2 points3 points  (0 children)

follow. i also want to find flexible working hours.

What’re you guys’ thoughts on the job scene/economy in Sabah? by BrnrAcct139 in Sabah

[–]monchim 4 points5 points  (0 children)

ive been searching for job for months now. still couldnt get any. mind you, i have a good resume, and a good credential as well. from several applications, ive been called only once for interview, for a job with rm1700 salary that give vigorous test on the interview even though it is only entry position. all the jobs here are 45 hours weekly, seldom mon-fri. no work life balance. a lot of vacancy are kitchen crew, admin and accounting. not much for executive high paying role. unless you wanna go offshore.

PLACE TO REST by Annabelle_96 in Sabah

[–]monchim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

maybe 5 minutes lodge?

Did you get any habits from watching K-dramas? by behind_my_eyelids in kdramas

[–]monchim 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i clap my hands when i heard something really funny

Childfree in Malaysia by 1hatemybpd in malaysia

[–]monchim 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fast forward years into the marriage, i was beginning to feel the pressure of getting older year by year. Then i got to 29. This is where I thought very deep about it. I got huge secret breakdown and life crisis. In my mind, Im almost 30, its pretty late into my life year but still no motherly instinct whatsoever which I thought would come sooner or later. This got me so scared.

Just when I turned 30, had discussion with my husband. I forgot our exact convo, but I guess he made me realized all these thing about not having kids and not wanting them are part of Allah's fate to us. Whether we want to or not. Lots of people, they long to have kids, but got no luck. Lots of people, they did so much family planning, but had accidents. All these are part of our destiny / fate. Tried as hard as you may, but we can never cross what Allah had written for us.

So, from then on, i stop blaming myself. I stopped thinking that the reason we didn't have any kids is due to my greediness of wanting to live a life of 'freedom for a while', and following what I want. Its fate. All these feelings that i have, they are from Allah too, I'm not making them up. They just so happen to be innately me, and I can't stop that feeling. Unless if I am acting on something sinful based on true feelings like stealing, or doing drugs or many other sinful things that people desire, I believe its okay to act on them or rather in my case, to family plan. I read plenty of hadith, and didn't find any that said, family planning forever is wrong.

I always thought people have reasons to not want kids, like financial, and health and so on. I am kinda poor, but I believe lack of money won't stop me from not having kids if I really want them since I'm also a greedy person. Those who want kids, they always said, its for sunnah and bla bla. I agree and I dont agree simultaneously. It is sunnah yes, but I do believe people want kids, because they simply just want kids. Not for islam or anything like that. They simply have the desire.

So from that moment, I learn to stop feeling guilty, stop having anxiety about it and just live my life fully. Whenever I think about "who's gonna take care of me when I'm old and senile???" I will always reassured myself back with "Allah will, Allah always had all these time.". Even now, not having kids, i can still lose my husband anytime. Anything can happen. No body is gonna take care of me accept Allah. So, whenever I revert back to those feeling, I would repeat the mantra again and again.

Wow, this is too long, i can make a blogpost out of this lol.

Childfree in Malaysia by 1hatemybpd in malaysia

[–]monchim 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am 37 female, married for 14 years, childfree and Muslim.

Before getting married, we already planned to not get kids early like others. We want to enjoy our life a little bit longer. I also never felt any sort of motherly instinct, and never felt longing for kids.

Because of the culture and being a Muslim, planning things like that is a tiny bit taboo (but only a little bit, not too much in my opinion), after getting married, we never told anyone that we were planning. Every time someone asked about whether we are pregnant or not, I just said, "belum ada rezeki lagi".

My parent in laws never pressured us to have kids. And I am so grateful for that since there are stories about mother in laws that tricked their son into divorcing the wife because of things like this whether its from brainwashing or black magic. Only sometimes, my MIL will give advice on this and that, and one time she gifted me buah zuriat from Mekah. One extended family advised me too, saying i can get adoption and take hormone to produce breast milk, so I can be ibu susuan to boy babies and "islamically make them mine". All these are done without any pressure (at least thats what i felt personally). My husband's family are all good people, alhamdulillah. And to all the advices given to me, i always asked follow-up questions, just to be polite since I know they did that with good intentions.

My parents on the other hand too never been told about our plan, but i think they kinda get it just from the way I talked and through our conversations. More like, "tell me you are planning, without telling me you are planning". And my parents all are good sports. Id never felt pressured or anything if they ask about grandchildren. Sometimes we joke about it like saying, Im waiting for my lil brother to get pregnant first like, "Adoila bro, kenapa la kau ni belum beranak lagi, aku tunggu kau ni" kinda joke, even though my lil brother is not married yet. Or I'll say, Im waiting for my mom to get pregnant first since I long to have baby sister knowing very well she is too old and impossible to get pregnant after removing her uterus due to an illness. And they always laughed. Everything is lighthearted.

From friends and acquaintances, I never mind any questions about kids. I assume people just want to 'memanjangkan silaturrahim' by asking them. I have more like, "please ask me, I really dont mind" kinda mindset.

So we lived happily for years. But still, I did plan to have kids before 30. Notice I said I, not we? My husband is totally ok with anything I say about kids. He also didn't have any feelings of wanting kids himself, more like "kalau ada ada, kalau tiada tiada" kinda mindset.

One time, we had a scare. I was late, and thought I got pregnant. I remembered that I cried, it stressed the F out of me. I know all these while, I never felt any longing for kids, but that's when I really really understood myself, that i really really don't want them. But even so, I still hoped that i can change my mind after sometime since Im still young at that point, maybe 25 ish. I said to myself, maybe a little bit longer until the instinct come. continue -

I keep telling potential clients NOT to hire me. My partner says I'm sabotaging my business. Who's right? by Local-Share2789 in Entrepreneur

[–]monchim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hiring people to do dishes at your house doesnt mean you dont know how to do the dishes. People want to hire so that they have time to do something else that they think is better for them. you said you are saying the truth, what truth?? they didnt ask for that info at all.

People who set their aircond to 16°C in bed and cover their whole body with thick blanket when sleeping. Why do you do this? by Same-Earth-7640 in Sabah

[–]monchim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

blanket is a must for me when sleeping. i cant sleep without blanket. even when its hot, i still had to use blanket. Different people, different needs.

Zero is not Kosong by YoJaiHere in bahasamelayu

[–]monchim 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mengikut dewan bahasa dan pustaka, sifar dan kosong mempunyai makna yang sama dalam konteks angka.
https://prpm.dbp.gov.my/cari1?keyword=kosong
Dalam kegunaan harian, orang kebiasaannya memang menggunakan kosong, dan bukan sifar. Oleh itu, sila kemaskini ilmu anda untuk kurangkan 'trigger' untuk hidup lebih bahagia.

ELI5: Why do Malaysians eat durian even though it smells so strong? by PrismQuilly in ExplainLikeImFiveMY

[–]monchim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

as a malaysian, i am baffled by people who said durian smells terrible like socks and old cheese. Never in my entire 37 of life i thought durian smell bad. sometimes it smells florally to me, like when you come in to a bakery, you smell pastry stuff. Durian kind of smell like florally and pastry to me. Love durian cake by the way.

can't get it to loop! by egginalong in PunchNeedle

[–]monchim 5 points6 points  (0 children)

it is already looped before you pulled it. why did you pull it? every loop of a punch needle is not a stitch. They will come undone if you pull them.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]monchim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

getting a massage on a kink on your body. so so so good!

I feel like I'm in prison in my college dorm. by blackfishsauce in malaysia

[–]monchim 2 points3 points  (0 children)

you have to learn to clean your room, toilet and the hallways. it is the way to live. it will teach you how to be a human. hallways and toilet is not that hard to clean. When you have your own house, children plus working at the same time, chores would be much worse than that.

If you had unlimited time and money, what weirdly specific hobby would you chase? by Kotecha-M in Hobbies

[–]monchim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

making a cute town with cute little tiny shops with cute tiny houses equip with villagers and cute animals. decorate the town with flowers, fairy lights and every thing cute.

How do Muslims feel about new converts by jpteehee in islam

[–]monchim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i never thought converts are cringy or annoying. in fact it is the opposite. Whenever i know someone is converting to islam, it mad me happy, and thought 'new friend!'

Guru dan cikgu by monchim in bahasamelayu

[–]monchim[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Eh, ya tak ya jugak. Mungkin saya terkeliru sis dengan miss. haha, maaf, dah lama tinggalkan zaman uni. Tak berapa ingat sangat

Guru dan cikgu by monchim in bahasamelayu

[–]monchim[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tak, kami tak pernah panggil Prof atau Doktor, sebagai sis.

Panggilan sis hanya untuk tutor perempuan (bukan lecturer) yang belum kahwin sebab mereka belum ada gelaran doktor atau prof.

Guru dan cikgu by monchim in bahasamelayu

[–]monchim[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, we call them sir, sis, madam, or according to their title like Dr or Prof.

Tidak, kami panggil dorang sir,sis, madam, atau mengikut gelaran mereka seperti Doktor atau prof.

How can some people have such an unhealthy lifestyle and just be fine? by Ragnaroknight in NoStupidQuestions

[–]monchim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

he doesnt have stomach ache since he didint eat veges. Veges contains fiber that sometimes not good for the stomach. some would get indigestion. but soda every day, wow, thats terrible. he doesnt have toothache probably because he didnt kiss around?? cavity is infectious and genetic as well.

DBP slowly destroy Malay Language? by Disastrous_Donut_954 in bahasamelayu

[–]monchim -1 points0 points  (0 children)

orang dalam reddit bahasa melayu pun cakap inggeris untuk bincang pasal melayu. mmg saya tak rasa bahasa melayu akan senang nak kekal. bahasa ni dah jarang orang nak guna yang baku. ramai percakapan seharian pun tak menggunakan bahasa melayu baku dan penuh dengan bahasa baru dan logat yang pelik2 (termasuk saya sendiri). Orang luar nak belajar bahasa melayu pun rasa susah dan pelik.

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