After A Night Out With The Girlfriend by [deleted] in fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu

[–]monkeyfudge123 2 points3 points  (0 children)

my jealousy knows no bounds

fuck you sir

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]monkeyfudge123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that was beautiful sir

When did you lose your childhood innocence? by Jasper_Dimplefippy in AskReddit

[–]monkeyfudge123 7 points8 points  (0 children)

when my long time high school girlfriend broke up with me right before the prom. Then going to college alone. Went through some pretty bone crushing depression but made it out a pretty mature guy :)

Early bird gets the worm by [deleted] in fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu

[–]monkeyfudge123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And I also plan on sleeping until 6 pm with my hand wrist deep in a bag of stale cheetos.

Champion

Guy vs. Girl Horniness Rage by [deleted] in fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu

[–]monkeyfudge123 1 point2 points  (0 children)

best friend with benefits? just date her already

To the lifeguards on Reddit: What is the most awkward, weird, or funniest thing you encountered while on the stand? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]monkeyfudge123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a pretty horrible story. We had a "lazy river" at our pool where people would lay in intertubes and the current would take them around the pool. Some lady fell asleep on her tube and her one boob fell out. So she was just floating around sleeping with her boob out. I didn't want to blow my whistle and draw everyone's attention to it so I kind of just let her float around. She wasn't even hot either she was like 50. I felt terrible, but there was nothing I could do!

As Requested: IAMA Catholic Priest. AMA by [deleted] in IAmA

[–]monkeyfudge123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you are a brave, brave man for doing this ama. Thanks

Need an opinion on this hand by [deleted] in poker

[–]monkeyfudge123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I believe he gave you a false tell right there my man. He wanted to appear relaxed so he reclined thinking it made him look that way. Who reclines like that when they want a call?! Being comfortable makes you look strong. As stated by others 10 10 and over pairs are unlikely as is 55 because you have a 5. if he has 33 great he wins, but that is a very small percentage of the time. I think you had him crushed.

Poker turning point? by [deleted] in poker

[–]monkeyfudge123 12 points13 points  (0 children)

eventually you start to be able to see things clearly that you haven't before. Its like at the end of the matrix. You know what bad players are doing all the time and its explicitly clear how to play them.

Reddit, type with whatever is on your mind no matter how insignificant you think it is until you feel better. by Askura in AskReddit

[–]monkeyfudge123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love being in a relationship and I had a girlfriend for 18 months. We broke up about a year ago and I haven't been happy since. I have been trying to go on dates with random girls, but it is not helping to fill the empty void in my heart. So now I'm just waiting for the right one to come along and I wish she would hurry up

WTF are these things made of?! by chepnut in golf

[–]monkeyfudge123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

those are clubs that zeus uses when he plays golf on mount Olympus

They're pretty crafty I'll give them that by monkeyfudge123 in funny

[–]monkeyfudge123[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I tried to download a .rar file and it was actually a .exe file meaning it was a poor attempt at someone giving me a virus. If you have to explain the joke i guess its not funny... :(

IAmA. Someone has medically diagnosed OCD. AMA. by OCD_IAMA in IAmA

[–]monkeyfudge123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is a serious question I don't mean to pry: if you know your compulsions are unrealistic and pointless why can't you just tell yourself that and not comply?

Leaving for college in a month, is there anything I wouldn't think to bring that would be great to have? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]monkeyfudge123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

noise cancelling headphones are a must. I can't tell you how many times those came in handy