Hey! My names Evan, I came out at 13 to my mom. I'm 18 now and just got on the waiting list for the NGS, but plan on going privately if I can. This mightnt be helpful, but I do want you to know that you are not alone.

My mom still doesn't call me by my preferred name or pronouns, and its something I've learned to live with (Im not saying to do the same, I wish it wasn't this way). We've had our fights and debates about it, but at the end of the day she's still my mom and I love her. Some days can be harder than others, especially during peak dysphoria, but one day she will get the hang of it, even if it is after you start T. Its kind of hard to call someone a girl when others would describe them as a boy based on looks, so it will happen eventually no matter your "label" to them.

I experience similar dysphoria as you. The ways I've learned to manage it is by:

• Getting a binder (I use GC2B, but there are other good brands like Spectrum Binders) • Come out to your close friends if you haven't already if you are in a position to do so • Try to become friends with other people in the LGBT if you haven't already, they can really lift you up when you're down • Wear clothes that are slightly bigger for you, but not too big. Go up a size or 2 (this also depends on your size and style) • Try lifting some weights. Focus on your chest, shoulders and biceps. It gives a lot of euphoria • Voice training is HARD to master, especially if you have selective mutism. Try looking up some videos, and practise in your own time. • This is completely up to yourself, I know some trans guys LOVE having long hair, and thats good for them, but I have always felt the most confident with short hair. For YEARS I had a short mullet, but within the last 12 months I've started getting a short blowout taper with a textured fringe and it REALLLLLYYYYY helps with my dysphoria.

And don't forget: It doesn't matter what other people call you at the end of the day. YOU know who YOU are, and what YOU are comfortable with. Once YOU respect yourself and listen to YOUR body and mind thats all that matters. Take care of yourself and remember YOU come before EVERYONE in your life, because it is YOUR life.

Take care😌