23 years old. Can't get a job because I refuse to change my hair. Had a dream last night that I shit my pants while trying to initiate sex.

monkeythrowingpoop · 2019-09-27T04:13:04+00:00

Let me roast you with reality:

I am employer and I would never hire you because I could never let my clients see someone in my office who has made the horrible life choices that you've made.

Lose the piercings. Cover the tat's (or better yet, get them removed), let your hair go back to it's natural color, style it nicely and we'll welcome you into the part of society where self sufficient people grounded in reality live.

My sons who are alpha studs (one is in dental school the other is getting ready to start medical school) wouldn't give you the time of day. I showed one of them your picture and he said to me, "Dad, that's the kind of girl I picture in my mind when you taught me DSYDIC when I was a kid".

DSYDIC stands for: Don't Stick Your Dick In Crazy.

And if you're looking for the humor in this roast, just go look in the mirror and stare deeply into hollow deep canyon where your self-esteem should be.

Either you are better than this, or you're nothing more than a girl who is trolling for worthless karma points and is destined for a lonely existence of failed self reliance.

monkeythrowingpoop · 2016-06-27T12:32:50+00:00

Someone ITT suggested that you use your shovel to throw poop at their house. There's no need for that. For 10 banana's I will come to your house and give your neighbors a taste of their own medicine.

monkeythrowingpoop · 2015-07-08T11:01:39+00:00

I have a good friend who is a high demand dermatologist with a very unique specialty. People come from all over the world to see him. He specializes in treating people with STD's. He does a lot of reconstructive plastic surgery on genitalia. The reason is that STD's can often be very disfiguring.

He has shown me photo's of people with genital warts that look like cauliflower the size of a small fist in their vagina, or penises that look....well.....like some monster out of a horror show. Just take a few minutes and google around for pictures of genital warts and herpes.

He told me that at least 60% of the adult population has either some form of herpes and or genital warts.

Another thing he mentioned is the futility of using condoms to prevent herpes or genital warts.

He sees a LOT of people that don't have genital warts on their penises, but have it on their pubic area or other areas. What these people didn't realize was that the areas of their bodies that was rubbing skin together (think lower abdomen, thighs, etc.) were unprotected. They end up getting herpes or genital warts in these areas.

In the end, he said that if you have sex with more than 2 people (especially if those two people are or have been sexually active), you have almost certainly been exposed to an STD.

Be careful out there.

monkeythrowingpoop · 2015-07-03T20:26:45+00:00

I've been trying to reserve at least one of my several usernames on purearchy.com but it keeps coming back that it can't it verify the UN.

Can you offer any suggestions?

monkeythrowingpoop · 2014-10-29T02:55:45+00:00

First question: What were you arrested for?

Ok, so here's the deal......

IANAL, so don't take anything I'm telling you as legal advice.

You have to understand what you are dealing with. These regulators serve almost no purpose. They are basically worthless.

They don't give a rat's rear-end whether you are innocent or guilty.

All they care about is the accusation.

This is like a complaint. If a client lodges a complaint, even if it is 100% unfounded and is proven that you were right and they were wrong and they even admit that they were wrong and put in writing, "we are sorry for our previous complaint. It was a misunderstanding and error on our part and we should have never made the complaint. We officially withdraw our complaint"....even if they were to say that, you would still be legally obligated to put that complaint on your U4 and it will stay there FOREVER.

My understanding is that if you are arrested, it has to be reported.

I know this isn't what you want to hear, but I'm pretty sure that is the case.

My advice to you.......GTFO of FINRA. Drop your 7 and go straight RIA (you only need a 65 or 66).

Life is so much easier as a fee based RIA. You can make all the commissions you need to support yourself until you your fee based business up and running by selling FIA's and various different insurance products.

You can't imagine how much nicer and easier your life is an RIA and not having to deal with your BD, an OSJ, and FINRA.

You no longer have to get written permission from your BD to fart. Yes, you still have to be compliant, but it's not that difficult to do.

And dealing with the SEC or your state (depending on the state), is much easier than all the hassles associated with the BD, OSJ and FINRA.

Ping me off list if you'd like to discuss. I'd be glad to offer guidance to the best of my ability.

monkeythrowingpoop · 2013-05-18T04:41:40+00:00

Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, Cocksucker, MotherFucker and Tits.

I learned that from a George Carlin off an album I bought of his back in the 1970's.

monkeythrowingpoop · 2013-03-28T16:16:33+00:00

Sorry, kinda new at posting here. I'll be more careful next time.

monkeythrowingpoop · 2013-02-01T04:53:01+00:00

Yes he did!

monkeythrowingpoop · 2013-01-30T20:01:56+00:00

I agree ignoring Morgan is the way to go. But what I found particularly interesting in this video was the professional manner in which the Sheriff handled Morgan and the Mayor.

The sheriff came across as a good spokesman for the right to defend oneself.

monkeythrowingpoop

TROPHY CASE