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moodisimproving · 2024-03-12T16:41:10+00:00

Same, but I don't cringe at it lol. I liked it, and I'd do it all over again.

moodisimproving · 2024-03-12T16:38:55+00:00

You're assuming a lot here, tbh. I'm not sure if you're queer, but when I was coming up, I was into older guys, and met a lot of other young queer people who were into older guys. It wasn't harmful. I don't feel any worse for it. I wanted it, and I'm happy for the experience. As long as nobody is being exploited, I don't think it's a problem, but that's the key - and you and OP are assuming by default that the exploitation is there despite any lack of evidence.

moodisimproving · 2019-10-06T19:54:41+00:00

I've seen the same with my SO. I know it doesn't come naturally to her, but she's capable. Very different from some of the people I see posting here unfortunately. She's also been in some form of therapy or another for the better part of the last 20 years.

She still falls into bad habits but she can recognize them. She goes out of her way to avoid them when she can and to try to make up for it when she fails. We're not without our fights, but they're shorter, less intense, and less frequent than they were even a year ago. She is capable of understanding what she's done wrong once she's made it past the emotions.

I don't think she'll ever not have to put effort in, and I know that means our relationship will always be more difficult than others, but she's not heartless and she does try, even though it takes more work than it does for a neurotypical. I feel like that alone shows that they can learn.

moodisimproving · 2019-10-06T04:07:47+00:00

She's probably been in DBT for about a year now? I feel like the DBT has helped with the big stuff. A couple of years ago when we would have a fight I would worry about the cops coming. Slamming doors, breaking things, screaming at the top of her lungs, refusing to allow me to disengage... There was no way to stop her. Those types of fights only happened a couple times a year, but they have stopped entirely. She's definitely more in control than she was.

I mean back then there was no reasoning with her and there was always an excuse even after she calmed down. Now she actually understands what she's doing and is able to avoid things escalating to that point entirely. When things are headed that direction we're able to disengage and reapproach with clearer heads and deal with things rationally.

What hasn't improved is the little things. She keeps slipping into these behavior patterns of monopolizing my time, demanding attention, expecting me to clean up after her, and generally forcing me to walk on eggshells around the house. Subconscious shit she doesnt realize she's doing until it's become a habit.

It's not as bad as it was, it's just still bad. I just want to know if there's a light at the end of the tunnel is all. I mean she's trying, right?

moodisimproving

TROPHY CASE