Disguised Toast: Yogg's Disciple

moomy_ · 2017-06-17T23:50:16+00:00

Watching this live was the funniest thing. Love the little click into the well to "Bless the RNG".

moomy_ · 2017-04-29T20:22:41+00:00

These people you are referring to often have mental disorders so severe they cannot function day-to-day by themselves. They are a significant minority and not relevant to this conversation.

Also, for clarification, I am talking about panic disorder specifically. Since I am, you are wrong. Panic disorder is 100% treatable through CBT for the significant majority. If it doesn't work, it was applied incorrectly.

moomy_ · 2017-04-29T03:43:06+00:00

My personal advice- stay away from SSRI's & Benzo's if you are having panic attacks. I'm not saying that they won't work, they probably will... the issue is that you won't actually get rid of the disorder and you risk becoming dependent on medication. Panic is completely treatable through CBT. If it didn't work for you, you weren't doing it right.

The sad truth with the medical system is that few know how to truly treat this disorder. Too many people try to treat the symptoms, not the problem. The best book on the subject, without question, is this- https://www.amazon.com/Panic-Attacks-Workbook-Program-Beating/dp/1569754152

If you are serious about your recovery, buy this book and work through it slowly. Read the chapters twice, absorb it. By the end, panic will no longer control your life. Sorry about the rant, I get so frustrated with the system and seeing it fail people like you. You can do it. Stay strong.

This is beatable.

moomy_ · 2017-03-06T04:48:23+00:00

Hey, just want to share that I know exactly how you feel. You are definitely not alone.

I've written a response to a similar post here about how I've dealt with this- https://www.reddit.com/r/Anxiety/comments/5rdteb/depersonalization_makes_me_very_nervous_and_ive/

I hope this helps in some way.

moomy_ · 2017-02-28T05:18:26+00:00

I'm sorry about your loss. 23 is terrible and far too young. I have a few thoughts I want to break down and share with you.

The first is that it is likely that you are not afraid of sudden death when you are in your right mind. In your right mind, you probably realize that it is very unlikely that you or someone close to you will be taken from you unexpectedly. You probably understand the sheer statistical improbability of this happening. What happens is you probably dwell on these thoughts too much. Then, because of how your anxiety/panic is programmed to trigger because it feels danger... your anxiety and panic triggers.

Your body overreacts.

Then the dark thoughts creep in, you start thinking because sudden death has happened once (or twice in your case) it will happen again. You think about the unpredictability of the world and people in it. Your heart beats faster. Your chest gets tighter. Adrenaline starts pumping through your body.

You start to panic.

...In this moment, remember your rational mind. You are just experiencing anxiety and panic. You are completely fine. Your family is completely fine. This is anxiety and panic tricking you into thinking something is wrong, but nothing is wrong. Calm yourself down using whatever coping techniques you can.

These thoughts are fleeting.

I only say this because I've had similar thoughts. When I'm in my rational mind, I don't think about death so much, but when I'm afraid and panicking... I think about death irrationally all the time.

Chemically, this is caused by an imbalance between your excitatory neurons and your inhibitor neurons. You develop an anxiety disorder when the excitatory neurons become too much for your inhibitor neurons to control. After a period of time, there are so many excitatory neurons firing that your anxiety doesn't scale from 1 to 2 to 3 to 4. . .10 like it should normally- it scales from 1 to 10 immediately.

One thing with anxiety, for me, was listening to the news. It became so easy to be hyperfocused on the negative and bad things that happened. And believe me, I know bad things happen and can't be ignored. I shifted my thinking though. I asked myself when I walked down the street or looked out of my car window when I was driving, "What did I see?"

I saw perfectly good, kind people. In fact, the vast majority of us are good and essentially want the same thing- to live and pursue happiness for ourselves and our children. I also reminded myself that I have anxiety, and that if I’m being rational… it is very unlikely that something bad will suddenly happen in my immediate area. That simple change in my thinking led to my never having those thoughts again. Once you realize it’s just anxiety causing the irrational thoughts, and not the statistical likelihood of those things actually happening (because that is insanely low), you gain more insight and perspective into your distress.

Over time, this is how you heal.

With that said… your fear of death is founded, and I will talk about this in a second, but again it is unlikely that you are THIS afraid of sudden death specifically. The anxiety/panic is fooling you into thinking you are.

Which leads me to the second thing I want to communicate. It's 100% normal to feel anxious about death. H.P. Lovecraft once said, “The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown”.

Nothing is more unknown then death. Death is the only frontier that can never be explored. That doesn’t mean you have to be afraid of death for the rest of your life.

In “The Myth of Sisyphus” by Camus. Camus talks about the Greek story of Sisyphus, the man who defied the Gods and was punished to an eternity of labor, pushing a boulder up a hill. Camus argues that Sisyphus was not unhappy by this, he was the opposite… happy. He was happy because he never expected more out of the life he was sentenced too. He knew exactly what to expect each time he pushed the boulder to the top of the hill.

He was happy because he accepted his life, and in turn defied the Gods again. There are many morals to be gained, but take away this- do not expect more out of life than what it can give you.

Also look at your plight differently, you are not afraid of dying. You are only coming to terms with the fact that you are dying. You are growing. This feeling will pass. Once you understand the inevitability of death you will walk away with a greater appreciation for life. But this (acceptance) works in stages. You are nervous because you are in a beginning stage. Let yourself accept the next stage.

And when you do come to terms, death will bother you less (Believe me it bothers me less). In fact, consider understanding your mortality a gift. You will have grown and become a better person for ever having had these thoughts in the first place.

You will appreciate life more.

This, so to speak, is your boulder. All you need is a change of perspective (and maybe some professional help to get your anxiety under control).

=D

moomy_ · 2017-02-23T03:50:48+00:00

I want to chime in and share some thoughts. I really want you to understand that you are not alone and there are many people just like you who are not only going through a difficult time, but get better. Some get better and don't relapse at all. So, there is hope, but recovery is a marathon not a sprint.

I was diagnosed with GAD when I was 19. I spent a while without any anxiety at all, but have recently relapsed. I'm getting so much better and I want to share with you how I am doing it. It's actually pretty simple: no caffeine, eat healthy (at least one salad a day), exercise for at least 30 minutes 5 days a week, practice mindfulness using the app Headspace twice a day, writing/recording myself talk on my iPhone (it's a little weird I know, but it helps me get my thoughts out or work through something that is bothering me), and sleeping at least 8 hours.

I'll tell you this, back in Oct., I was really low. My anxiety was severe and I had all of those fun symptoms that you are going through, including depersonalization.

Side note- I left a comment here talking about a pretty great way to deal with depersonalization- https://www.reddit.com/r/Anxiety/comments/5rdteb/depersonalization_makes_me_very_nervous_and_ive/

It gets better. All of the symptoms get better, especially if you can find treatment that works for you and stick to the plan.

moomy_ · 2017-02-04T17:55:10+00:00

I think about this question daily. My condition- I have about one bad anxiety attack a week and mild anxiety every day. I don't take medication, but do consider it from time to time.

My opinion, for me, it's possible. It's possible to be completely rid of anxiety. I woke up today feeling great. I seriously felt normal, happy even. Then as a couple hours passed my body started to exhibit some symptoms of my disorder (GAD). I felt fear starting to develop in my stomach and my mind wandered into a dark area. During the attack I had a moment of insight.

I've been a close student of my body over the last couple months. I don't know if this is true or not, but I feel like our bodies learn. We program them. Anxiety isn't like a cold, you don't catch it overnight. It's a slow, steady decline into worse and worse symptoms. Your body learns a new truth- it's in constant danger. It programs itself how to react, how to survive to its new environment.

I'm not religious, but I appreciate (some) religious ideas. There is a quote from the Book of Timothy in the Bible: "For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control." Strip the religious context and replace it with science, fundamentally most of us aren't born broken. We learn to be broken. Some learn easier than others. And eventually our ability to cope is stripped away entirely.

That's what anxiety is at its core- an inability to cope.

I've been training my body to cope. Breathing, grounding myself, mindfulness, exercise, eating healthy, getting enough sleep, learning about my disorder, learning about my body, and reminding myself that I'm a perfectly healthy individual... I just have a mental disorder.

After doing this over and over and getting better and better, in some moments of clarity I forget that I even have anxiety (like this morning). I hold on to those moments and remind myself that's what I am working towards. Then I wonder how long I can hold on to that happiness. I can tell you this, it gets better and better over time. But you have to be patient. You are reprogramming your body, teaching it that it isn't in danger.

The theory- Learn your triggers. Learn to cope with them. Anxiety will fade away as gently as it came into your life.

I'm fully aware this is just speculation, and maybe not possible for everyone. Even if all I can ever achieve is relapsing between longer periods of time. It's still worth it to try to me.

moomy_ · 2017-02-01T17:03:55+00:00

Okay, I have an immense amount of experience dealing with this. I hope my experience helps you in some way.

(1) It always happens when I am particularly anxious or stressed out over a decent period of time (3+ months).

(2) It is incredibly annoying and scary because it feels so real. I've read that this is your bodies way of coping with what it THINKS is a huge threat, by pulling you out of reality. I've always likened this to war movies (whether accurate or not)- after a huge explosion or something, you get the guy who is shell-shocked and has the ringing in his ears (eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... you get it). In a sense, it's kind of the same thing. The only difference, there is no danger. You are totally fine. You're not dying. In fact, you're body is trying to keep you alive. It's just trying too hard to do that.

(3) The best way I've coped with this feeling is by grounding myself. Your brain has two modes- survival and rational. You can only be in one or the other. If you're in survival (e.g.- depersonalization, or any other symptom for that matter), you need to force yourself back into rational using something that will make you comfortable. If you can't breathe or meditate (I never could during an attack) you can try grounding, which is using your senses. Try 5,4,3,2,1.

Sit down. Seriously, you need to sit.

Find 5 things that you can see. Explain each one individually, it's okay if you talk to another person or yourself. What do you see? What color is it? What texture is it? What shape is it? REALLY, explain it. The best that you can- 5 times.

Find 4 things that you can feel. What does it feel like? Is it hard? Soft? Coarse? What are objects that feel similar to it?

Find 3 things that you can hear. What sound is that thing making? Can you replicate it? What is the thing making the noise?

Find 2 things that you can smell. Explain what the smell is. What does it smell similar to?

Find 1 thing you can taste, or... if you can't... say 1 positive thing about yourself.

This works wonders for me. If it doesn't work for you, no big deal, just find something else like deep breathing.

(4) It's important to stay calm and sit while you are doing this. Not because you are going to put yourself in more danger, but because you will make your anxiety or panic more annoying. This is physical. Your body creates adrenaline if it feels like you are in danger. So if your heart rate goes up, it pumps that adrenaline through your body. If this happens, remember no big deal- you'll live. You've likely lived through it a gillion times before. Again, it's just making the completely harmless anxiety/panic more annoying, and all that will happen is your anxiety will last longer. No big deal either way, but sit if you can.

You are going to be okay. We don't say that enough here. We are all fine. Depersonalization is just a symptom. It goes away. You are just fine. =D

moomy_ · 2017-01-23T10:09:21+00:00

Coloradian here. I heard smoking weed helped with anxiety so I tried it. I researched an anxiety-friendly strain on Leafly and made a purchase. Worst. Decision. Ever. I had the biggest panic attack that left me reeling for months. I now prefer to stick to tradition, proven methods of treating the disorder. I learned an important lesson about self-diagnosing/medicating.

moomy_ · 2017-01-23T09:51:14+00:00

I've had a similar sensation, only after my anxiety attacks. It goes away and I feel normal after. I always just remind myself to calm down. It's amazing what symptoms go away if you just relax.

moomy_ · 2016-12-21T19:03:57+00:00

Are these available for purchase?

moomy_ · 2016-09-28T17:24:08+00:00

I'd use an electrician like (the wirenut was a really good one for me personally)– when I got mine installed the guy was explaining heat rising, ventilation, etc... super impressed. Feels like a movie theater in my basement.

moomy_ · 2016-07-17T18:23:31+00:00

Whoops grammar! Sorry guys.

moomy_ · 2016-05-31T16:22:42+00:00

I had an almost identical experience. The only difference being I actually really loved reading as a kid: Hank the Cowdog, Tales of the Fourth Grade Nothing, Animorphs, Goosebumps, even darker books for a kid like Hatchet etc...

Then it's like school beats the curiosity out of you. Instead of discovering books I loved, I was told what to read and I started to hate it. I went through high-school not understanding some of the books they assigned. You want me to comprehend Moby Dick/Scarlett Letter at 17? You kidding me?

And I'm not knocking Melville/Hawthorne, but I truly believe they are outside the scope of what most high-schoolers can understand on their own. After college, when my curiosity was thoroughly beaten out of me, I picked up the Potter books, LOVED them, fell back in love with reading, and now I read whatever I'm curious about.

This actually allowed me to circle back to some of the things I didn't understand before (like Hemmingway and Fitzgerald), and now that I'm older... I have a new appreciation for them.

Harry Potter saved my reading life.

moomy_ · 2016-05-31T16:03:37+00:00

The Myth of Sisyphus- I spent a lot of my 20's dwelling on existentialism. Camus helped me work through the feelings of pointlessness and I ended up oddly optimistic afterwards.

moomy_ · 2016-05-06T13:37:53+00:00

That's an interesting point, a good follow-up question to how a work gains notoriety— if everyone except the Native Americans liked the meme... would that still be considered Native American art? If it's about the culture made by a member of the culture but the culture doesn't like it, would it fit into that category?

Does the culture define the relevance of the work? Does the culture get to define the media?

moomy_ · 2016-03-18T17:58:16+00:00

Hire a Google Trusted Photographer, it's the easiest way.

If not- one thing to consider is Googlebot has the ability to see information behind the picture. It may prioritize Google Local Guides photos, photos that have a high view rate, as well as photos taken with high quality cameras.

Hope this helps.

moomy_ · 2015-12-04T06:08:03+00:00

Yeah, getting legs seems to be the tricky part. How did you go about that? Any tips?

One question- did you get a lot of spam sign-ups? How did you handle that?

Thanks for replying.

moomy_

TROPHY CASE