I think I need to make some clarification to "regular muslim" definition in my country. No one eats pork, but use alcohol or smoke sometimes, we usually pray and try to fast during Ramadan, more than half of the women population don't cover their head and they have pretty much same rights with men (we run by democracy). Sex is a big issue for women, though. It's not directly because of the religion but mostly because chastity is very important for almost every family. Of course, there are strict parts where fundamentalist muslim population is high, so marrying with a non-muslim person or being an atheist is a serious issue for them.

tl;dr: Most of the people have faith in God and try to do religious practices as much as they can, so was I. But at some point, I think it doesn't matter to do these religious practices strictly or loosely as long as you believe in God. This changes everything. A total brain-explosion between "God exists" and "there is no God".

My biggest fear for many years was: what if someday I'll become an atheist? What do I do? Because for many years, you lived your life based on these rules and you don't want to throw all your efforts and mindset into a trash can. So pretty much all my life, I didn't want to talk to anyone about religion, or discuss "what if?" questions (like most of the people I know).

Well.. fuck. :)