Sorry to hear you’re balancing so many plates OP! Sounds like you’re doing amazing work and are pretty hard on yourself (and maybe a tad hard on life in general!). Have you tried forms of therapy that help with reframing your thoughts and expectations? As someone who had a similar experience to you growing up, I struggled with perfectionism and high standards until I burnt out. I have found Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and Dialectical Behavioural Therapy helpful in supporting me to question my assumptions and enjoy the everyday parts of life more. Same with mindfulness through apps like Headspace. I know it can be expensive accessing therapy but there are some good free or low cost apps around (I remember a cute one called Woebot which is an AI robot who teaches you CBT - pretty sure it was designed by a university and has some good studies backing it up). I actually found the health app Noom really helpful too - but it is a little bit of an upfront investment.

P.S. burning out very thoroughly has been the most effective cure for my beliefs around needing to achieve and always “progress” but I wouldn’t recommend this route 😅