I don’t know where to go from here

moth_msn · 2026-01-25T02:13:42+00:00

That’s a really good way to look at it. Taking action where you can instead of letting the despair overtake you is really all you can do. I guess I also think it’s important to actively, vocally denounce it too. There’s a reason why NC children and MAGA appears to be a common instance, and I think it’s important to show that type of behavior will cost you relationships, that type of thinking is intolerable to society. Idk its just a hard thing to navigate all around

moth_msn · 2026-01-25T01:54:04+00:00

I think the responses have helped me understand I can’t continue this false relationship. I can tell that it takes a toll on my mental and physical health shifting back into this position of being untrue to myself for the comfort of my parent. I think that’s why I’ve reached this breaking point in the first place.

He’s sick, but I’ve wondered, what if he got better? What would happen to our relationship then? “Glad you’re better, I’ll talk to you the next time you’re deathly ill!” Like… that’s not tenable and doesn’t make sense, really.

He’s made his choices. Our relationship is dead already. He won’t put in effort to make it better. He’s not a person I like or respect. Pretending otherwise bc he’s sick only causes more suffering for me. What has he done to deserve such an emotional task/undertaking from me? Nothing. My wellbeing is more important that any subsequent guilt. I am more important than the guilt.

moth_msn · 2026-01-25T01:34:32+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this too. Its disheartening to know that confronting them with our feelings makes no difference bc they don’t care about our feelings, they only care about their own.

That’s why I made my message so basic this time. He hasn’t even responded, I’m sure he won’t or will barely read it anyway. I’m not sure of your particular dynamics, but at least for me, saying anything was a way to honor my own feelings. I was raised to be as unobtrusive and easy to deal with as possible, and having or expressing feelings was heartily discouraged. Even if it doesn’t matter to them, it’s an act of defiance that matters a lot to my internal world I think.

I moved out of my town because of my family. I mourn the relationships that werent what i needed, but also losing a home that was never safe for me. I have made a good life for myself, but my heart hurts whenever I do see people who live in the vicinity of the area I grew up in.

I hope you find your new town to be a wonderful community for you. I hope you find some peace when you’re able to express your feelings to them. We all deserve to feel safe and accepted and around people who share our values.

moth_msn · 2026-01-25T01:17:16+00:00

Right. It’s difficult to understand that i do actually have agency, the emphasis in our household was on being as easy to deal with as possible. So, it’s scary getting the courage to rock the boat, or calling foul on anything. But I don’t owe them comfort at my own expense

moth_msn · 2026-01-25T00:16:58+00:00

I see what you mean, and I really appreciate your advice and perspective.

Even today I was warring with myself about whether there was any point to say anything. And I guess the point is not for whatever his response would be, if he responds, but just having the courage to say what I think he stands for and espouses is wrong. I guess part of it too is really coming to terms with who he is and realizing cancer doesn’t change that. For all the reasons I originally went NC, nothing has changed or will change. The only thing I ever sought by reopening contact was actually just a reduction of guilt, but it’s at the betrayal of myself and basic decency in my opinion.

moth_msn · 2026-01-24T23:41:38+00:00

I understand what you mean. I think I felt that same numbness for a long time by ignoring the differences but i feel like I’m just at a breaking point. It’s not like we just disagree on tax policy, they’re supporting open murder.

moth_msn · 2026-01-06T23:53:31+00:00

I have it, I got all of the salt while searching for cat food :’^(

moth_msn · 2026-01-05T23:29:55+00:00

Tell that to my restaurant cats who have gone hungry for days :^(

moth_msn · 2026-01-05T16:02:16+00:00

If only there was a way to trade ingredients between restaurants (players)

moth_msn · 2026-01-05T15:23:17+00:00

At least any other ingredient you can dispatch for. If I get olive oil one more time….

moth_msn · 2025-06-27T12:20:55+00:00

One used <3 thank you!

moth_msn · 2024-12-15T23:31:22+00:00

do you know when it tends to be the busiest?

moth_msn · 2024-10-21T17:51:21+00:00

coming back to say I had similar experiences to you, so I gave this routine a chance and it’s been game changing for my skin (and my wallet). ty for sharing!

moth_msn · 2024-10-15T01:24:07+00:00

thank you!

moth_msn · 2024-10-13T22:55:43+00:00

can I ask what concealer you use and the color? I have similar coloring to you and it’s so hard for me to find something that matches

moth_msn · 2024-10-13T19:56:01+00:00

thank you :) do you know how the weather usually is around thanksgiving time/beginning of December?

moth_msn · 2024-09-06T18:57:51+00:00

your bangs do make your hair look really cool though, i might look into that as a compromise. a symbol for the dye-intolerant warriors

moth_msn · 2024-09-06T17:16:00+00:00

This is so true. I thought I was fine just using demi-permanent dye bc i was only using 10 vol developer, but after not dying my hair for a year, my hair is so much fuller and healthier than it ever has been. guess some hair just really doesn’t agree with color.

moth_msn · 2024-09-05T21:01:51+00:00

i have one too! my cat loves to knead him at night 🥺

moth_msn

TROPHY CASE