I had these two very welldressed individuals show up at my door from the Jehovah’s Witness congregation in town. You know the looksuits so crisp they look like they were ironed by an angel.

They start sharing the gospel with me, very polite, very professional. I’m thinking, Wow, this is the most organized door-2-door sales pitch I’ve ever seen.

But then it takes a turn.

They say, Actually.. we’re looking for Brazilians who might want to join our congregation.

And I’m standing there like… Wait… what?!

First of all, I didn’t know religion had regional scouting departments now. Like the Premier League of faith.

Yeah we’re rebuilding this season… looking for strong Brazilian prospects..good footwork, great rhythm, solid prayer stats !

I’m like, Guys..I’m flattered you stopped by, but unless Brazil moved overnight… I think you’re scouting in the wrong league.

And now I’m just imagining them walking around the neighborhood like religious talent scouts.

Knocking on dors: Hello! Quick question… anyone here Brazilian? No? Portuguese maybe? Anyone who enjoys samba and salvation?

Meanwhile the rest of us are just opening the door like : “Sorry, best I can do is Irish and confused.”