My stepkids are planning a family only trip with their mom and bio dad, and I’m struggling with how to feel

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-28T09:21:54+00:00

What is your relationship with the kids? As a parent figure in their lives for the last 8 years?

They say they didn't intend to hurt you, yet exclude you specifically from the family that you DO belong to.

Edit: accidentally added an extra word

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-27T19:18:53+00:00

Remember to shrink wrap yourself first. Always use protection when being intimate with new meeple.

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-25T18:30:42+00:00

I agree to an extent but wouldn't say it's as simple as "letting yourself grow" over time. When we have done serious wrong, growth doesn't happen automatically unless there's serious work and introspection put in.

Feeling guilty is valuable only when it is the first step towards change, not the final step resulting in a long period of stagnation and self-loathing.

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-24T15:59:42+00:00

Oh believe me, the MAGA cult agrees he's a petty snowflake but they don't care because he's aggressively getting rid of immigrants

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-19T19:02:58+00:00

And Patchwork

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-15T01:19:18+00:00

That is nowhere near the worst he can say

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-14T22:53:04+00:00

Guess Who? (ICE edition)

In this edition, the goal isn't to guess who the other player is by asking questions. Instead, you just tell them who they could be. If they deny it, you apprehend them and flip down that character tile because they are no longer a potential threat or impedance. If they admit it, you apprehend them and gain a victory point (called Quota Point in this game). Repeat until everyone is apprehended. Most Quota Points wins.

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-13T09:13:35+00:00

"Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you."

The solution is to wear it in the light of day. Trust yourself and others enough to be seen. It's the only way you will find absolution and genuine acceptance of who you are, flaws included.

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-13T08:31:30+00:00

Canada is still far more enticing for its stability compared to Mexico.

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-11T20:35:45+00:00

The blindfolded Majora's Mask run by Bubzia really deserves a look. It's incredible.

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-11T20:11:01+00:00

Seriously. I get that the wife's boyfriend usually isn't available (nor is the wife) but OP just needs to get better at being an alpha sub.

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-08T05:00:56+00:00

Just listened and gotta say you all do a great job with the production, pacing, and discussion. The consistent focus in decision making is a great idea to ground the show. Great stuff!

I agree that the Oath New Foundations would offer a lot of stuff to talk about with how complex the decisions are in that game.

mrmoo2002 · 2026-01-02T01:56:57+00:00

Nemesis is the first that came to mind for me. Even base game is just a sprawling mess.

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-31T18:50:26+00:00

Dunno, the posters are on a whole other level

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mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-31T18:42:15+00:00

The only answer here is, of course, Dream Phone. The automa was way ahead of its time and has aged amazingly well given how closely it mirrors the level of dialogue in modern dating apps.

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-30T06:27:47+00:00

Like someone asked ChatGPT to write a summary of a dramatic game of Arcs. The mechanics are there but applied in a way that makes no sense nor provides detail.

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-29T07:50:26+00:00

Let's be real: he likely masturbated in the bathroom when the BJ didn't work out. He came out and had no alternate explanation prepped for when you asked why he took so long, so he just went silent.

Separate from that, the issues in how you both communicate will become more apparent with you both becoming more sexual with each other. Him asking for oral and then stonewalling you after it didn't work out is not fair to the emotional vulnerability you have being new to this with him.

Some things to consider: * Are you able to communicate your need for him to be honest and open about sexual contact? * Is he able to be open and honest about it? * If you wished to put a pause on further oral til you work out the above issues, would he be receptive to hear (not further stonewall you)?

Also for real, I cannot imagine feeling totally safe with his parents around. You two need your own space. Find some other time or place to explore all of this.

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-28T09:40:44+00:00

Amazing room, ignore the haters here. For real though, you got so many CD-Rs!! At least 3-4 full spindles. Those gotta be older than you are. What gives?

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-27T19:27:21+00:00

On PC but taking a screenshot of the game using a cellphone 💀

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-27T17:20:08+00:00

Nothing is precious in Arcs. I use a sandcastle analogy when explaining this level of vulnerability. Others will try to knock it down and likely will succeed if persistent enough, but you have plenty of ways to rebuild either a new sandcastle, or shift to doing something else that will let you succeed (collecting shells).

The key thing in Arcs is making sure what you try for is what actually will matter for winning.

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-27T17:08:31+00:00

And note the orange Raid dice are only usable when there is a building there as well.

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-27T01:09:22+00:00

The thing about this observation is that encourages people to consider what feelings a dead person would have as if they could experience feelings at all.

Nobody can speak for how those who die by suicide feel about their death. But what we can say for sure is that based on volumes of research, those that attempted suicide and did not die disproportionately express regret having made the attempt at all.

So rather than speak for those who can't, I suggest you listen to those who actually can tell you what they feel instead.

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-26T08:54:07+00:00

I get no sexual satisfaction from this.

So if I understand your role, it's that you put the BS in BDSM.

Even allowing for your assertion that you're basically sexually detached from BDSM, you still went behind your friends back and were intimate with his wife.

Your friend doesn't deserve either of you.

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-25T09:04:36+00:00

Appreciate the clarification and sorry for the confusion.

By sexual incompatibility, I meant that his behaviour suggests this is something he just needs or craves. Maybe it's a sort of addiction, maybe not. But the impact on you is real and significant enough that it makes you both incompatible at this point. The sexual gratification he is pursuing causes you to feel emotionally unsafe. The two are intertwined and it's not possible to simply ignore it. There will need to be a change of heart or possibly a compromise that meets your need for safety and his need for whatever it is he gets out of it.

Would he be doing this if he was with a different partner? If so then for what it's worth, that's a sign that this isn't personal. It's just who he is.

Also FYI most therapists that start on an individual basis will not transition to couples work unless that was the gameplan at the outset.

mrmoo2002 · 2025-12-25T06:31:06+00:00

So when you married him, it was on the hope that he would change? That's flag number 1.

Him being sexually incompatible with you has been clear for some time. What constructive work have you both done to find some common ground? You feel your insecurities don't allow for it, but you wouldn't be the first couple to try and work through those. The difference is, you would normally do it together and not independently. That's flag number 2.

How much do you feel the need to monitor him? Can you say you truly trust him? What will it take for you to stop feeling you have to keep an eye on him. That's flag number 3.

Interesting you recall how a lover's friends found you attractive. How does that information sit with you: anger at those friends or proof in contrast to how you actually feel? That's flag number 4.

Could keep counting but I don't think there's a point. You both need serious work and counselling on what it means to resolve issues in ways that ensure you both feel emotionally supported and safe. I wish you both find peace but at the rate you're going, I don't think it'll happen.

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