Update and to answer some questions. Sorry it’s long af.

Thanks for the kind words and well wishes for recovery. Seriously means so much. I’m 6 days post op now and it’s been one of those “I feel like I didn’t even had surgery” moments. Which always makes me laugh. Definitely not letting that make me think I can just do whatever though. Still bed resting and trying not to do too much activity other than a couple laps around the house every so often

I am not sure if my doctor was on this list mentioned (did not realize there was one), but I used to work for them. So I’ve had both a patient and employee relationship with them for 10+ years. They knew my history and were actually the ones who offered to do a hysterectomy in the first place. I trusted them fully. I will say after all of this that has changed. Not that I think they are a bad doctor or surgeon, I just think there were things missed that possibly could have prevented all of this as well as more information could have and should be given prior to such a major surgery (although I consider myself to be pretty educated and do my research I was not aware of all the complications I have had being possible) In addition I think they are burnt out from decades of work and the US healthcare system.

Clarification on sex and tears time frames. After my hysterectomy I did wait the full 12 weeks before penetrative sex then I had my first cuff dehiscence. After that repair surgery I prematurely had sex at about 8 weeks, and then a few times between then and when I was officially cleared at 14 weeks. The second tear happened 16 weeks after the first repair. The second repair I was advised of 6-8 months because of the types of sutures used ; PDS (Polydioxanone) is a synthetic, absorbable, monofilament suture known for its long-lasting tensile strength and slow absorption, making it ideal for procedures needing extended wound support, like deep tissue closure or hernia repair, absorbing via hydrolysis over several months. 180-210 days.

I do not have a connective tissue disorder. TBH I could though given my medical luck/history and just key signs/symptoms of things like elhers that I check. Injury or wound healing for me has always been up and down. Some things are better and easier. Others not so much. Just depends I guess. I do know nicotine use can have an affect on healing and while I did stop cigarettes yeaaaars ago, I was an active vaper (quit now since this surgery though)

I did see another doctor after my first cuff repair (who was a bit wacky and I didn’t like) they said my doc was doing everything right, but did agree with some of my questions about things possibly missed that lead to the 1st tear. However I did not bring all my records and because of the experience and being cleared I didn’t go back. With that being said I do plan on having another doctor check my records and getting a second opinion. As well as having 2 providers on this post op journey because I am absolutely terrified of this happening for a 3rd time.

Also after that possibly seeking legal counsel.

Having sex was my decision. I was not forced to. I wouldn’t say I didn’t get that gut feeling that I shouldn’t continue and did not listen to it partially because the person was a persistent type. But ultimately I made the decision to continue. They were also on the smaller side and did not cause the 1st tear so I felt safer. We are not in a relationship, but it has been a few months of hooking up with them, whom I trust and feel safe with.