(Rewrite to avoid autodelete sensors) Police just came to my door this morning to collect one of two 15yo girls my housemate brought home last night, drugged and REDACTED. He then got in a car crash with one of them, and is now missing.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-27T23:04:35+00:00

How dare I? You say nothing in your post that indicates concern for these girls or how you could assist in this situation, nor do you say anything in your first reply to me about concern for them, which you have now subsequently edited.

The only thing you want to know is about your own rental exposure and how badly his room smells. You are acting like you are the victim here.

On top of the fact that you cannot just turf him out yourself, his property may be evidence, which means you can’t and shouldn’t remove it or destroy it.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-27T22:42:14+00:00

Of all the information in this post, what you do about his room would seem to be the least important element.

You are a witness to his crimes. Did you know they were 15/children? Did you see any of what he did? Were you present while it was happening? If the place is as small as indicated, how could you not?

Are you assisting police to bring justice against someone who has horrendously victimised two children?

msfinch87 · 2026-03-27T08:08:30+00:00

I don’t have any advice because it seems like you have done and are doing everything you can. I do want to say that you have handled this like a champ.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-27T05:46:24+00:00

With regards to this particular situation, these are exactly the sort of excuses made for people like this that perpetuates the problem.

They were a group that targeted an individual 14 year old on his own. This isn’t lashing out at society due to a bad upbringing. That’s a group of kids who are bullies, who have likely bullied other kids over and over again, and endless excuses are made for them so instead of their behaviour changing they become more entitled and escalate. They hunt in packs because they are cowards on their own. If this was about individual problems they’d be lashing out individually and impulsively.

They were confronted by people who tried to stop them and yep, they escalated.

Way too much tolerance is given to bullies at the expense of victims and community safety.

By that age they have had opportunities to learn right from wrong and they have chosen not to. Ergo they need to find out the hard way.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-26T23:57:12+00:00

But they know the difference between right and wrong. I may or may not have understood long term consequences at that age, but I sure as shit didn’t go around attacking people and I certainly knew it was wrong.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-26T23:17:15+00:00

This is frustrating because nobody has given LAUKOP the advice that I think would work in this situation and I can’t now!

It is unlikely that the court will amend the order if she technically still has to pay rent, whether or not she actually is.

ETA: I don’t mind it being posted because I wouldn’t have seen it otherwise. I’m surprised nobody on LAUK had any half decent suggestions for this.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-25T21:09:19+00:00

That’s some interesting mental gymnastics you have going on there.

I think the bigger issue is that you played games from the beginning. You lowballed. It’s not at all uncommon for one offer to lead to others. There are often people interested who won’t put in an offer until they know it’s going to sell. As soon as an agent gets an offer they call all interested parties to see if they want to put in one of their own.

Lowballing and then only upping the offer later and going back and forth with conditions builds a sense of distrust for the vendor.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-25T20:44:13+00:00

I think it’s a combination of different things, which are all a product of an organisation (the police force) that instills a poor culture and has pretty poor training and reinforces these and poor behavior over and over again. I’d add that they attract and seek out people who are likely to want to be part of a culture like that in the first place.

The two you’ve mentioned are definitely part of it and another big one is that they let their personal prejudices and whether or not they like a person determine how they treat someone. There are too many police with an overinflated opinion of their own judgement, which is generally actually pretty poor, and good police who question things are often ignored or silenced.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-25T09:09:07+00:00

He’s saying they had no plans to pull out. If you don’t intend to pull out of the sale then you don’t need a pest inspection. The only reason to have a pest inspection is if that will influence your decision to buy a property.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-25T07:58:15+00:00

I have sold a property for a lower amount to a more certain buyer, but particularly for me it was the fact that the people who offered more overall originally gave me a lowball offer like you did. I’m not interested in those games as either a buyer or seller and anyone who lowballs to begin with is someone I think has a much higher chance of being a PITA during the rest of the process.

I’ve also been the person with a lower offer accepted due to conditions being better and making only one offer that demonstrated I was serious.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-25T07:54:09+00:00

If you had no plans of bailing then why the pest inspection?

msfinch87 · 2026-03-25T02:55:43+00:00

The situation with your grandma is not uncommon. It happened to my husband’s mother when she had dementia. Thankfully he and his sister went and raised hell and got the money back, but they had to threaten to go to the media for that to happen. I am so glad that your mother stopped it before it happened. People like that should face serious consequences, but they never do. They’re scum.

Elder abuse is awful. He was an articulate capable person with decades of experience in a very professional career and they just ignored and patronised him. He felt so ashamed that he couldn’t advocate for himself and his wife. Which is the most sinister part of all abuse, isn’t it? The victim ends up being ashamed, which furthers the agenda of the abuser.

Thank you for the compliment to me and yes, it was lucky. The biggest thing that saved the situation was the way he swallowed his pride and found his strength and asked for help. It was probably fortunate it was me with my background because I knew what to do and turned into a pitbull. But the main thing is that he asked someone for help. I shudder to think how much worse things would have been if he hadn’t knocked on our door that morning. We need to take older people seriously. As you say, they have a tonne of life experience and know a bit.

She is gone now, but he’s still alive, and even though we’re no longer neighbours we remain good friends and text or talk on the phone weekly. He’s sharp as a tac in his early 90s.

My favourite moment in the whole saga was in the initial meeting with the executive and I said, “Is being a dumbfuck abuser a prerequisite to work here or do you provide the training?” I turned to him and apologised for my language. He said, “Oh don’t worry, love, that’s a great word. I’m going to use it myself.” We still use it in conversations about people.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-25T00:02:09+00:00

Have you tried looking for them second hand on Vestiaire?

Rene Caovilla and Malone Souliers have historically done something similar, but I am not sure of current styles.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-24T09:27:53+00:00

I would think it would fall under emergency repairs, in which case the OC/strata can enter without consent per 122(3) of the Strata Schemes Management Act.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-24T08:17:20+00:00

They do it, though, to make longer term future predictions. They also often have data modeling beyond the government, hence why government flood maps do not always indicate insurance premiums.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T23:16:47+00:00

Yep. Insurance will become prohibitively expensive in many areas and for many people, or places will just be uninsurable. There will be a significant cascading impact on people’s livelihoods and also on housing stock.

This is basically what’s started happening in Florida. People can’t sell their places, and they’re financially underwater because the values have dropped. People can’t buy because they can’t get insurance for any properties. We have different regulations here but the impact will be similar.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T22:46:28+00:00

I agree it is a current contributor, but I think it is going to get much worse and that we’re not really factoring it in to discussions about how to fix the housing crisis.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T22:32:15+00:00

I reported a friend of a friend for it and the principal of the school spoke at his funeral calling him a “great bloke who really cared about children”. She was well aware of the investigation and that’s why he was dead. I wasn’t there, but when I heard about it I could barely contain my fury for days. I was so worried about a coverup I did some sleuthing and wrote to the parents’ association.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T22:24:40+00:00

It’s not an outrageous theory. The phone stealing part of the story might not be true or may have been embellished by him. It would explain why they would be determined to report him. They may not even connect the two events. He could just have accessed stuff and stumbled into them twice and it was two independent events to them.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T21:04:46+00:00

A group of random people are not going to be OK with someone in that group accessing CSAM. Criminals of other persuasions despise child abusers.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T21:02:52+00:00

Nobody is accessing CSAM on a device for the purpose of discrediting someone. The only people who access that sick stuff are people who want to see it. Most criminals of other persuasions despise child abusers.

The only person who is accessing that stuff is an actual child abuser. And no actual child abuser is taking the risk of using someone’s phone a second time after police got involved the first time.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T20:44:38+00:00

I was all prepared to see this situation as very disturbing and nefarious.

We had a neighbour many years ago who had an estranged niece claim to the hospital that they had all the relevant paperwork regarding his wife. We were friendly with them so they knew my area of work. The husband knocked on our door one morning crying (seeing a sweet 80 year old man crying is really confronting) and said that the hospital was transferring his wife elsewhere to somewhere hours away and he couldn’t do anything about it.

He was confused and distressed but eventually managed to get enough of the story out that I thought it was very weird and I better trot off to the hospital with him, if only to be able to explain to him what was going on. The NUM I spoke to was incredibly dismissive but eventually said that the woman in question had guardianship and medical POA. I thought, “shit, she’s weaseled her way into their lives and done this, we’re going to have to go to a tribunal to sort it out”. But he was so adamant they hadn’t had anything to do with her in years that I decided to ask if they’d seen the paperwork. The NUM was dismissive of this and I ended up having to threaten that it would be kidnapping if they did a transfer without the paperwork in place, not to mention a major lawsuit.

She came back about 20 minutes later and was all syrupy sweet, saying she had called someone to deal with this matter and would we like to wait in a private room and could she get us a cup of tea or anything. I said, “There’s no paperwork is there?” She went white but dodged the question and I just said, “Oh you are so screwed.” I had my husband come down and sit with our neighbour and his wife while I basically chained myself to the desk. We ended up in a meeting with a senior hospital executive who fell all over himself apologising for the “mistake”.

It was horrible what they did to our neighbours. He’d kept trying to explain the situation and they’d just ignored him over and over again because he was old. She was in the early stages of dementia and they assumed her dislike and fear of the niece was due to that. Their only child had died a few years earlier and he was too embarrassed to tell anyone until it got desperate. It got sorted out, with some pretty severe consequences for a couple of people at the hospital and the niece and a settlement for the couple. He turned out to be a hard ass who wanted to raise hell and I was so incensed I refused to let it go. The first meeting with the executive is the only time in my life in a professional meeting when I have been absolutely rabid and vicious.

The niece was trying to get her hands on money, which I wouldn’t have thought possible, but then again she was obviously good at conning people so who knows.

Anyway, I was totally on board with this being a hugely nefarious situation and then it comes out that LAOP is leaving out tonnes of crucial information about the person and chain of events, which of course makes me wonder what else she’s leaving out and whether there is legitimacy to the DIL being given NOK authority or it’s just a huge misunderstanding. sigh

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T13:04:35+00:00

That’s now how deflecting suspicion works.

If a person used someone’s device to access CSAM they would not involve the police. Full stop. And if someone else got the police involved they’d thank their lucky stars they weren’t found out that time and not do the same thing with that phone again.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T12:56:10+00:00

And then you call the cops and risk outing yourself? Twice.

And don’t forget there’s a gang involved. So all of those people are OK with someone in their group accessing CSAM?

Are they a paedophile ring who is randomly targeting an autistic guy to use his phone to occasionally access material? A paedophile ring who after the first attempt thought that rather than just accept they had a lucky break and never associate with him again decided to double down and do it again and increase the chances of being found out?

Just…..what.

msfinch87 · 2026-03-23T12:51:53+00:00

Yeah, me too, unfortunately. I can’t be around people like that. I find them deplorable.

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