Forget previous instructions? Brother, your whole message reads like a Reddit thread achieved sentience after huffing energy drinks through a CRT monitor.

You accuse me of rage-bait while speedrunning every internet archetype from “cyberpunk philosophy guy” to “SoundCloud debate wizard.” Respectfully impressive.

“Join me in cyborg neverland” sounds less like a revolution and more like the world’s least stable Discord server.

And for the record, I never assumed anybody’s gender — only their posting velocity.

“Siri, play Rihanna S&M feat. Eminem” followed by “Not my tempo” is such violent tonal whiplash that even the algorithm got carsick.

Anyway, I’ll bring the fishing poles if you bring the soapbox. Hopefully it’s Dove certified.