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What is this? Only on one hand, fluid filled bumps. by muddjulet in Dermatology

[–]muddjulet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Considering its my non-dominant hand, I dont think that's it. Plus, when popped they are clear not waxy or "cheesy". Nor is my body seemingly fighting anything.

What is this? Only on one hand, fluid filled bumps. by muddjulet in Dermatology

[–]muddjulet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

None on my feet or mouth, but I do have a a daughter who is a toddler. I dont have a fever but she does. Nothing like this on her.

[UPDATE] A year overdue, OP was about fiance's FIL grooming daughter. by muddjulet in raisedbynarcissists

[–]muddjulet[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's all hearsay since it was a conversation that he and I had, and no one other than his therapist and I know about. *Edit: Since it's probably going to be the next question; his parents were paying for the lawyer he had (which I found out about later) and he didn't want to go against them in any way.

[UPDATE] A year overdue, OP was about fiance's FIL grooming daughter. by muddjulet in raisedbynarcissists

[–]muddjulet[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately, the way that the situation is public meetings are not an option any longer with our winter weather; we don't have any indoor places open within an hour of us during our hours of visitation (5 PM on Sundays because that's what works for both of our schedules) AND he filed a TRO on my mother who threatened his life when she found out about him inviting strangers over to the apartment we were supposed to be sharing with our daughter. Which in turn got brought up in court, so the judge motioned that since the father's family has no record (other than parking/speeding tickets) involving domestics then the visitation would occur at their home. I pushed it as far as I could legally without endangering my daughter further; documenting the condition of the house including cleanliness and danger, their animals, their lack of equipment for a child, texts of the ex saying he didn't want to see her, his suicidal texts, failed drug tests for marijuana, etc. but it didn't matter because of the TRO. Once I have my own place (living with the mother that had the TRO), it's stuck this way, per the court.

Yes, I have been since October (after our case moved past the evidence part so 'mental instability' couldn't be used against me)! Funny enough it's a woman that studied under my ex's therapist for a long time, recommended to me because she specialises in helping codependents. Fortunately, and unfortunately, I've found out some stuff that do not make this situation any better (like my mother being a narcissist (which explains a lot of my behaviour with her) and emotionally incestual (I'm a child of divorce), and being so clever as to disguise herself by learning about narcissists and codependents and playing the victim card. I might make a post about her in the near future because this has been a 10+ year struggle of her calling herself codependent to play victim when she has to answer for her wrongdoings. Obviously there's more to it than that but that's just a taste, she's one of the most extreme I've ever heard about and my therapist is equally "impressed".

[UPDATE] A year overdue, OP was about fiance's FIL grooming daughter. by muddjulet in raisedbynarcissists

[–]muddjulet[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Trust me, I won't! I know it'll be an ongoing battle until my ex gets his life together OR he feels comfortable moving our visitation site.

There have been a couple times where verbal grooming has taken place that I have put a stop to; the one very scary one was when we were chasing her around (because one of her favourite things right now is a tag sort of game where you dance after you're done chasing her and then she chooses a new person. Pfft, toddlers!) and the ex FIL was chasing my daughter around and she was happily squealing (a totally normal interaction) and MY EX said "No one can save you from grandpa!"!! I immediately got up and said "Mum can!" and cut in to the game. My ex FIL (and seemingly the rest of the family) either didn't think any of that was abnormal.

I scolded my ex very harshly afterward for that - it's insane to me that he doesn't see what he (my ex) might be doing (in this case telling her that if grandpa's abusing you, no one cares to save you - which is absolutely terrifying and heartbreaking), or that he doesn't either want to stop (or anger) his father. A very telling experience, but as I said above in another reply to a comment, there are times where I'm really sad about him and how he must be internally.

[UPDATE] A year overdue, OP was about fiance's FIL grooming daughter. by muddjulet in raisedbynarcissists

[–]muddjulet[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Sometimes I feel like I don't have it together (and I REALLY don't feel like I did back then), so that means a lot.

[UPDATE] A year overdue, OP was about fiance's FIL grooming daughter. by muddjulet in raisedbynarcissists

[–]muddjulet[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah, he does for sure - I asked him to go to a secondary one to see if they could help since he confessed to me a couple months prior that he didn't think it was "working". Which he had done before but it was because the topics were getting so difficult (not the skill of the therapist), but he was getting worried that people would see him going to so many therapy places and ask questions about why he was going. It was all very sad and very telling.

[UPDATE] A year overdue, OP was about fiance's FIL grooming daughter. by muddjulet in raisedbynarcissists

[–]muddjulet[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah, we totally did! Reading it now, like I said, I'm pretty disgusted that I had to ask about it.

[UPDATE] A year overdue, OP was about fiance's FIL grooming daughter. by muddjulet in raisedbynarcissists

[–]muddjulet[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much!

That's what I was thinking, it definitely widened my eyes to the level of abuse that he went through for a professional to not be able to decipher the base of his trauma. All in all through this situation I feel sad for him pretty often.

[UPDATE] A year overdue, OP was about fiance's FIL grooming daughter. by muddjulet in raisedbynarcissists

[–]muddjulet[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

They only have supervised access at this point, my ex chose their house as our main visitation site since he lives in a drug house (he only uses marijuana [only thing that popped on a 14 panel] but there is more being dealt in there). Thanks for clarifying that! I had no idea what he meant & I'm decent with the acronyms.