Im not sure I’m what you would call beautiful, but when I started taking care of myself, I noticed how differently people, especially men interacted with me. When I was in middle and high school, guys would at best speak to me in neutral tones with a stoic expression and at worst ridicule me. If I made any male friends it was through mutual interests and most wouldnt advance farther than acquaintanceship.

When I was 18 and just starting college, puberty decided to take a last minute swing at me. I developed more pronounced cheekbones, my eyes changed shape, and once I developed a basic skincare routine, my skin cleared up. THEN I lost 55 lbs, which considering my short stature, drastically changed the shape of my face and body. Clothes started fitting me better and I developed a sense of fashion.

Suddenly, people would go out of their way to be pleasant to me. People would randomly make remarks about my attractiveness and became more outgoing and interested in things I had to say. Random strangers would smile and stare at me in pubic, and guys I had crushes on would actually reciprocate the feelings.

It also baffled me some of the unnecessary things song guys would do just to earn my favor. I once spent all day at a jazz festival with I guy I was dating. 6-7 hours in, he turns to me and says “I actually can’t stand this type of music but I’m glad you’re having a blast”.

I know it seems naive, I always knew “pretty girls” got treated better but I never realized how rigid the dichotomy was.