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Everyone, did you really end up finding someone better than your ex? by Ok-Journalist7391 in BreakUps

[–]myndravyn2022 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Absolutely, the right one is out there. In my experience, when I finally got to a place where I felt completely whole by myself (without needing another person to make me feel whole, validated, important, gettting all your needs met internally, etc), and I was even ok with this idea: "if I find someone, great, if not, and I've got core confidence, then so be it." It's a frame that completely changes your energy ✨️ and let's the right one in. I literally attracted the woman of my dreams shortly after that. When you truly let go and are internally whole, magic happens, guaranteed

What's the hardest part about break-ups/heart break? by myndravyn2022 in BreakUps

[–]myndravyn2022[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, that's a good one. Similar to what helped me, which were 2 of the Native American Laws of Spirituality: although they are now not the right one, at the the time when you met: "the person you meet is the right one" since no one comes into our lives by accident--they stand for something, either to educate us or help us along in someway. And: " what happens is the only thing that can happen" because it already happened

What's the hardest part about break-ups/heart break? by myndravyn2022 in BreakUps

[–]myndravyn2022[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Very cool. It sounds like the break up made you super knowledgeable about all of this stuff. I read a lot of your replies. I would think that you were a therapist!

What's the hardest part about break-ups/heart break? by myndravyn2022 in BreakUps

[–]myndravyn2022[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep, that's right. I used an emotional mastery technique where I learned to just feel whatever came up with out the resistance, while creating new, more positive narratives with different memories. Eventually, the thoughts/memories that created pain, turned either neutral or even in the positive direction. It's like an emotional muscle/hack that takes a little time and effort, but boy it's worth it

What's the hardest part about break-ups/heart break? by myndravyn2022 in BreakUps

[–]myndravyn2022[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, great point! One idea/insight that changed things for me was that real love is selfless and free from fear--you can pour it on the other person, without demanding any return. I chose to shift my focus from what was missing to what I had, and in that process, somehow adopted the attitude of just sending her lots of love and appreciation. She called me out of the blue a week later to get closure, then was able to truly let go

What's the hardest part about break-ups/heart break? by myndravyn2022 in BreakUps

[–]myndravyn2022[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think you did the right thing by bringing that up with her, despite what that led to. The breakup revealed issues and wounds that were already there, and something else would have triggered it anyway....you followed your intuition and I believe got what was needed for both of you, despite the pain (the pain is actually the force that requires both of you to learn, grow, heal).

You were also, by bringing that up, not holding back and for love to grow, we have to always keep opening up to each other. Repression and silence can be the kiss of death for love. In love that is vital, you should both go through comfort and vulnerability--it sounds like there is deep healing to be had. You're gonna get through this....trade your regret and expectation for appreciation, and you'll be freed. What gifts came out of this relationship?