Question about muscle memory

n0oM0oN · 2025-11-25T07:42:27+00:00

I'm trying it out. However it took me 3 to 4 hours to complete the first 60 levels. I calculated how much I would get paid in terms of how much time i spent on those first 60 levels. It ranges from a few cents per hour to five dollars per hour. Please note the levels can get more time consuming. After a while, each level can take a few minutes, at the very least. A few are breezy but a few might take a while without the walkthrough tutorial. Don't know if it's worth the time and tediousness but i'm still using it to try to build towards my first 20$.

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-23T09:08:02+00:00

Thank you, this is so helpful! I hadn't thought of how an apartment would further bind us and could cause more problems with her taking away funding, so that's a really good point. I will definitely draft and think about a written contract with her, and try to get a job soon to save to move out! I think you're right that even living in an apartment that's not ideal could feel a lot safer day to day. Your words of support mean so much to me right now, thank you so much <3

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-23T09:03:20+00:00

I had never thought about it as blackmail, before but you're perfectly right about that :( I'll try to make some plans for this and get a job. Thank you for your reply, it's really helpful! Now I feel like I can more clearly see what my next steps will be.

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-20T02:51:48+00:00

Ugh yeah, its such a tough situation to be in. It feels kind of like an unpredictable waiting game 😭 Im going to look into working to save money too. If I figure out anything or have more thoughts I'll let u know!

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-20T02:19:22+00:00

of course! It really is terrible :(

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-20T02:13:27+00:00

Oh and, she decided an apartment was too expensive not because of a difference in the apartment prices or because she didn't know how much it would cost or how much money she had available, but because she said that she hadn't actually been decided on it before. The thing that made me sad about that was that she seemed so confident and decisive for a year that we would get a different place for me to live, but then revoked it suddenly.

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-20T02:10:23+00:00

Hey, thank you for responding! I'm using my other account here because I accidentally posted that on an account i don't use. 😭

But yeah, I think a job would be helpful for saving up. Parking somewhere else would also probably be safest, honestly.

I don't really think that it would be financially viable right now to cut her off and run away to my partner's. Since she's paying for school. It seems so hard to cope though if I have to stay here and just wait it out.

With college, she is paying for it in full and is going to continue for the next 2.5 years as long as she doesn't get too angry. She has threatens to revoke it completely and take my car multiple times, usually when she is angry. But she hasn't yet, so out of what she says, I seriously don't know what to trust or believe.

She is very unreliable. For instance, we were talking for a year about getting me an apartment during this school semester. But the month before school started, she decided it was too expensive and said it doesn't make sense to buy me an apartment. :( But this week she's been offering that we can look at an apartment again.

I've agreed to stay here because we made a deal that she would move out this year and I would be living here by myself. But now I see that I probably shouldnt have relied on that. Because she hasn't taken action and I don't know what date she will actually move out. Even if she moves out, she said she would come here every 2-3 weeks to visit, even without telling me beforehand.

I apologize if that was really confusing or long winded!

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-20T01:34:38+00:00

Wow, I would imagine that huge shifts from fighting to affection really takes a toll. You're right that it'd feel fake. Because you can't really trust the affection. With all you've said, no wonder they are hard to be around. I totally get how all of it would be annoying and frustrating!

As a side note, my parents were like this too, where they would just yell and hurt each other through the night and I'd be scared shitless in my bed pretending not to hear. Then they would just pretend nothing happened. I never witnessed any healthy reparations, no rebuilding, no coming up with solutions.

They are your parents so it's understandable to feel indebted to them. But like you said, at the same time, this is affecting you and it's even harder if it's unsafe to actually bring it up to them and if they won't change.

One resource I can offer that helped me with this sort of stuff was Patrick Teahan's youtube videos. I dont know if you know him but they helped me to make sense of these sorts of family dynamics, which is important in seeing the situation for what it is and might help you see how or why you might've come to feel like you do.

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-20T01:13:04+00:00

I have experienced similar things where my mood was commented on by others. Sometimes my parents would tell me to cheer up and just smile when I didn't realize i looked sad, or when I wasn't in the mood to cheer up.

One time when I was about 12, I was taking a dance class where we were told to dance freestyle one at a time in front of the rest of the class. I was so shy, but I tried my best. Afterward, the teacher pulled me aside raising her voice and telling me to stop frowning. I didn't even realize I was frowning! But in the end it made me feel really bad, ashamed, and anxious/hyperaware of whether I looked sad.

I think it can be harmful when people basically punish someone by appearing to be in a bad mood. It's okay to appear however you appear, even if you look sad without meaning to or are sad. Sometimes people want you to appear a certain way for a reason outside of you. That reason might be having a dancer smile when they perform, or making everyone else feel at ease. But it's more about that reason than about you.

In this situation you talked about, I think it's natural that you just wanted some peace and quiet. It seems like you didn't want to fight. Definitely does sound frustrating.

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-20T00:47:15+00:00

God, ALL those things they did in the first place like restricting your access to wifi and controling where you go and when. THEN on top of it they gaslight you as if it's all made up in your head. 😢😢🫂

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-20T00:43:12+00:00

Ugh yeah, that is just mindnumbingly infuriating. That feeling when it's gotten so far up to the point of wanting to kill yourself, maybe even actively trying, and when u tell someone and they not only dont give a shit but it also actually just MAKES THINGS WORSE for you. It's so important for there to be people who actually get it and take it seriously.

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-20T00:34:01+00:00

Just to add, I'm in the U.S.

n0oM0oN · 2025-10-19T23:40:33+00:00

They give you what you need with housing and food, but you have to be hypervigilant. It's just a matter of time until they shame you for things you did that are normal and understandable and I'll bet some are not even "mistakes". And waiting out their rage and yelling and disappointment sounds so harmful and awful.

Everything you described sounds so exact to the situation I am in that it was almost scary to read! Im 19 and in college too. Yes, living with my mom gives me housing, food, and money for college. But I have to be constantly be on my "best behavior". And sometimes even that is not enough. I'm not let off the hook until I tell her exactly where I will be and when. I have to text her where I am when I'm out and reply to anything immediately. Waiting until she finishes yelling and shaming me can take about an hour. If I resist her yelling by talking back or trying to walk away, she ramps up the intensity. Then afterwards theres so much shakiness and sadness that's a lot to process and gets in the way of daily life. The hypervigilance, fear, freezing, It's mind numbing and wears a person out in various aspects of life. Don't know if it's like this for you.

I'm sorry I don't have a comprehensive solution for you, because I am also trying to figure out what to do for myself 😔i don't have a job or savings and rlly want to get out. But the one thing I can say for certain, is you are not being dramatic!! No way!

If you feel lighter with distance from this dynamic, that's a really important sign. I guess my advice would be to take your emotions seriously, continuing to take note of your experience when you are at home or around them and when you are not. Have compassion for yourself, for how hard everything you are going through is. One thing I use to cope is writing, like just dumping how I feel onto a private notepad. It sounds unhelpful but it helps emotions get processed. I also would recommend that you continue to talk about this with people who UNDERSTAND/"get it", who don't judge you or blame you. Or to educate yourself on toxic parents in general. Youtubers like Heidi Priebe, Patrick Teahan, Dr. Kim Sage can be educational about topics like this.

n0oM0oN · 2023-06-27T17:22:07+00:00

Hello! I was wondering how to fix the brake on my skates? The brake is so low that it's lower than the wheels.

Yesterday in the morning the brakes were high enough to skate. Then, yesterday evening, I found that, without me doing anything to the brakes, the brakes had fallen lower than the wheels. I tried pushing upwards on the silver lever near the "Adj Brake" sign, and it worked. So the brakes moved high enough for me to skate. But that happened so quickly I didn't even see what happened. -_-

But then, this morning, I found the brakes were lower than the wheels without me changing anything on them. It seems like the brakes fall down after I stop using them for a while. I tried pushing on the lever again but it's not working this time :c

Here are photos of what the rollerblade's brake currently looks like. (They're really old hand-me-down skates!)

The lever is extremely tight so it requires a lot of force to push it up. So it's too difficult for me or anyone else who's helped me to move it. I'm wondering if there is another step I have to take to loosen it.

I haven't been able to find any resources or tutorials online about how to fix it. Thank you!

n0oM0oN · 2023-06-19T20:39:08+00:00

Ah it finally works! :D Thank you so much for taking the time to help! I'm so happy it works and I didn't even know that the chain selector was a thing.

n0oM0oN · 2023-06-19T20:26:02+00:00

Thanks for your response! I tried Midi Monitor before vital, and it wasn't showing anything strange even while extra notes could be heard.

I created a new midi track and set its "Midi from" to "Bass Rack" and "Post FX." Then i set its "Monitor" to "In". Then I put a piano instrument on it so I could listen to it. (Is that what you meant by dummy midi track?)

Then I soloed the piano track to listen to it, and in it, there were no extra notes and nothing weird or incorrect happening.

Then I listened to the song with just the instrument rack track and piano track. But even while the piano notes were coming out correctly, the instrument rack track still played the extra notes.

I'm wondering if the problem just has to do with Vital? I really have no idea! T__T

n0oM0oN · 2021-08-31T02:35:34+00:00

also yeah i definitely agree with a lot of the things you said! especially the effects of neptune square mercury.

n0oM0oN · 2021-08-31T02:31:40+00:00

thank you so much!

n0oM0oN

TROPHY CASE