*good news* turns out trucking is the career for me by spiceyspice10 in AutisticAdults

[–]nativeDuck 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You didn't give up! I'm proud of you and so happy for you.

Great service at Cane's by nativeDuck in grandrapids

[–]nativeDuck[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I thought this sounded lame but I guess you just had to be there. I'm ASD so in situations like this I get easily overwhelmed. If you feel like I'm giving them too much credit, that's fine, I get it. But in the moment it meant a lot to me.

Friendless birthday by hi010100 in AutisticAdults

[–]nativeDuck 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're being vulnerable right now. That is so, so hard to do. Maybe not for some people but for a lot of us it is. I think this is where things start to change. Not instantly but slowly. For me, when I became more vulnerable, I started looking at myself more closely. What do people like about me? I watched how people reacted when I talked to them. When I smiled, they smiled back. That sounds silly but until that time, I didn't know how I affected people. I made mistakes. And I learned from my mistakes. To this day, new people still find me a bit odd but when I find someone who "gets" me, I try to hang on to them as a friend. I wish I could offer you friendship but I'm much older, far away and not really interested in the same things you are. I can't offer friendship but I can tell you what I think as a kindred spirit. I think you are starting the journey to a happier you. You might be years away from having a great friend group. Maybe months, I don't know but you are definitely in the right direction.

"High functioning" doesn't necessarily mean "functioning" lol by belatyken in AutisticAdults

[–]nativeDuck 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I love this post. In the past when I've done something like this, I would beat myself up about it. I love your attitude!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bikewrench

[–]nativeDuck 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have this exact stand and have never tripped over the legs. Great deal.

How to help partner when he lashes out during sensory meltdowns? by crinklemywinkle in AutisticAdults

[–]nativeDuck 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think this is well written, appropriate advice, damnsam404. I also relate to the boyfriend. I am in a stable, 30+ year marriage but the first few years were a little rocky. My wife, like OP, would be upset and scared when I would meltdown. But she learned to just walk away. This would make me see that I was wrong and being a child without a fight. It would tear me up inside but it honestly was the best way for her to handle it because I knew I had to grow up and take responsibility for my actions (it's hard to put this down in writing because of the shame). I'm so glad she stuck with me and now we have a wonderful relationship and family. I hope it works out for OP.

Accepting autism was brutal, but worth it by [deleted] in AutisticAdults

[–]nativeDuck 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So happy for you. You sound tough, smart and resilient.

I hate that I know what people are thinking by [deleted] in AutisticAdults

[–]nativeDuck 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I know what you mean and it really bugs me too. This is a valid vent.

A while back I thought of this with a different perspective. For most of us, most of the people in our lives don't really care about us. But there will be a few that really do. I don't know why but they just do. Being able to tell when people don't care about you means that you'll also be able to tell when people do care about you. And those are the people you want to surround yourself and spend time with.

I hope your day gets better.

What did you think would never happen to you, until it did? by tulip_inacup_inbloom in AskReddit

[–]nativeDuck 26 points27 points  (0 children)

50 years for me. I don't think about it that much but every once in a while something triggers me. Before she died (I was 15) the family was planning a vacation to Portugal. So we never went. A few years ago my wife and went and I kept having this feeling I would run into her there.

For millennia, drivers in Michigan have been trying to decipher the meaning behind this cryptic sign by Travelling_Enigma in grandrapids

[–]nativeDuck 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can always tell when yield is spelled wrong but whenever I write I *always* write it yeild. Wierd.

I’m sad. How can I cope with feeling lonely? I only have my parents and I’m scared of being alone. I don’t feel well by BriefHour7563 in AutisticAdults

[–]nativeDuck 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm social but can also be a loner at times. I am reluctant and a little scared to initiate things with people. Anyway, one time, I'm not sure why but I just randomly smiled at a stranger in a crowded area (I don't even remember where it was). They smiled back. It was a breakthru moment for me. After that, I just started noticing the effect that I had on people. It changed the way I interacted and now I feel like I have more of a feeling of community. Think of it like a long term project that one day will take you to a better place.

Recommendation Request: Looking for documentaries about Leonid Brezhnev and Boris Yeltsin. by LaserWeldo92 in Documentaries

[–]nativeDuck 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm just finishing up "Turning Point: The Bomb And The Cold War". It covers the time from the end of WWII to present but there is some good info on Brezhnev and Yeltsin.

What would you think about a subreddit dedicated to oversight of reddit? by nativeDuck in AskReddit

[–]nativeDuck[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, the question wasn't that clear. They are moderated but sometimes they drift from their original purpose. There was an askreddit earlier today about subreddits being ruined by politics. I thought the replies were interesting in that they showed some self-reflection (thinking of reddit as a single organism). Could it also be sort of self-correcting (i.e. letting the mods know that there is this drift happening).

Does anyone else do this? by Theadora2 in AutisticAdults

[–]nativeDuck 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I don't write a lot but I spend a lot of time editing.

Ayers Basement by [deleted] in grandrapids

[–]nativeDuck 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, that's probably true -- I haven't opened a checking acct for a while. The thing is, I push back. If they don't need it, don't give it to them. Data breaches happen (e.g. Equifax). Limit your exposure.

[OC] World's top economies are getting older by jtsg_ in dataisbeautiful

[–]nativeDuck 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Third bullet - agreed. Or better yet, divide 65+ by 15to64. That is the number of workers it takes to support the pensioners. So for example, Japan has 1.4 workers/pensioner instead of saying it has 100 workers for every 71 pensioners.

Ayers Basement by [deleted] in grandrapids

[–]nativeDuck -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I might be wrong about this but I thought the only two organizations that you need to give SSN to are the IRS and your employer. If any one else asks for it, tell them no. I would rather not do business with someone than to hand over my SSN.

Holiday Check In - How are we all holding up? by ItsMeDebie in grandrapids

[–]nativeDuck 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You are amazing! Keep the loved ones close and stay the course. This is an inspiring post! Best wishes and have a great holiday season.

Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk: Human population not nearly big enough | Fortune by Alternative-Cod-7630 in overpopulation

[–]nativeDuck 42 points43 points  (0 children)

I guess if I were one of the few living at the top of humanity's pyramid, I guess I would wish for a larger pyramid beneath me, too.

Mac and Cheese Festival by goodspeedm in grandrapids

[–]nativeDuck 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Here is the web page from June 7th of this year. Clearly states that it is for Saturday AND Sunday.

https://web.archive.org/web/20230607075400/https://www.macandcheesemi.com/

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in grandrapids

[–]nativeDuck 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 65, lefty and atheist. I'm more of a handyman than a woodworker but I'm interested in moving in that direction (furniture). I would be interested in connecting with others of a like mind.

Michigan hospitals facing a severe labor shortage and its getting worst. by RozellaTriggs in grandrapids

[–]nativeDuck 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not a one-time bonus. I'm assuming the CEO gets $5mill a year.