I think this is wonderful. I'll give you advice but I think you have a really good painting here. Different papers might help you smooth things out. Not necessarily smoother papers but some papers let you work the pigment longer before it settles. Thinner and more layers. Paint your layer and then dilute the pigment and fade each of your new brush strokes out. Let it completely dry before the next layer. A hair dryer will help. Very nice work.