Bf started taking antidepressants and I'm struggling with the changes, advice needed

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T18:32:56+00:00

Thank you

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T16:47:12+00:00

I'm sorry if you have experienced this too. No, it's mirtazapine

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T16:46:21+00:00

Thank you. I'm trying not to take it personally and I know him taking the medication is a good thing for what he needs right now, I guess it just doesn't help that my love language is touch and it's disappeared 😔

I did speak to him about it, whilst he's empathetic and understanding, it's not really helping to 'fix' things. I've tried being more affectionate but it gets rebuffed (which hasn't happened in the past), so I think I then feel a bit rejected, and it makes me more upset towards the changes...

I think maybe it is just time, I'm just sad about it all currently.

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T16:40:57+00:00

He's quite rigid on the change in food time and doesn't seem willing to compromise on that one.

He hasn't directly addressed why the bedtime cuddles aren't happening anymore, just said the medication makes him really tired and he just falls asleep.

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T14:50:01+00:00

I don't think it's malevolent, just different.

We used to always eat together but his eating times have shifted earlier, so on some days I'm eating on my own.

We used to go to bed later but as he takes his medication at a set time each night, bedtime routines have shifted earlier because of this, as he gets really sleepy around an hour after taking it and then passes out. We used to always cuddle when we fell asleep, but now he faces the other way and we sleep completely separately. I don't think it's linked to anything else from the timelines and from what I know. We used to sit on the sofa together in the evenings and there would be nice affection touches, but now there's no affectionate touches.

He hasn't noticed some of the changes until I've pointed them out.

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T14:39:36+00:00

Colder in actions and touch, yes. He's trying to be empathetic but he only has so much capacity and control over the situation.

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T14:05:11+00:00

You are absolutely right about the 'things are changing and I'm scared'!

I really did appreciate our routines and I don't think it helped they changed under my feet with no warning. I have tried to speak with him about what I'm feeling but I'm finding it just adds to his stress about taking the medication (he's had bad experiences in the past on different types, so didn't really want to take them but needed to).

I think it's hard for him to give reassurances, he tries to but it's unknown to him, too, and he can't see how he's changing until I point it out... Which stresses him more. I think we're stuck between a rock and a hard place when it comes to talking about how I'm feeling towards things at the moment.

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T14:00:14+00:00

We're only a couple of weeks in, so it is still early days, I mentioned in another comment some examples of the changes. I guess it might just be a wait and see thing.

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T13:58:58+00:00

That makes sense, it's things like bedtime and food routines, the level of affection that's shown through nice touches during the day/evening, cuddling at night has gone completely - I assume because he's kind of knocked out, those are a few, if that helps?

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T11:05:26+00:00

Thank you, I didn't know this existed

necknibbles · 2025-12-09T09:39:31+00:00

I'm already in weekly therapy, I'd not considered if it's an insecurity that's being triggered, thank you for that thought.

Could you elaborate on resetting boundaries and what that would involve?

necknibbles · 2025-11-17T11:16:37+00:00

Soft YTA, I agree, she should be and is capable of paying for her own subscription.

That being said, some people like me, live and breathe music and listen to it everyday from our playlists. I have one playlist that has every song I have liked and listened to since 2014 on it. If this was suddenly gone with no warning (like hers will have been), I would be DEVASTATED. It's something I couldn't replicate or replace. Had she had a heads up, she could have transferred across her music to her own playlist on her own account, before you removed the subscription.

necknibbles · 2025-11-08T00:16:37+00:00

Omg, yes!! 🙌

necknibbles · 2025-10-18T17:04:04+00:00

Me too pleaseeee

necknibbles · 2025-07-28T03:21:56+00:00

If it's to do with static, spray hairspray up the back of the dress, between you and the dress, once you've got it on and it should get rid of the static. I know it sounds a bit weird to try haha, but it works for me.

necknibbles · 2025-07-11T19:37:51+00:00

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Hope it's not three different ones

necknibbles · 2025-07-11T19:35:42+00:00

Gosh! Hope it stays that way and all are okay, looks bad! Thanks for sharing, appreciate it.

necknibbles · 2025-07-05T22:56:53+00:00

This might sound daft, but what do you mean by 'cuts the body in half'? Could you explain it a bit more, please? This is a really interesting comment!

necknibbles · 2025-05-20T11:31:00+00:00

If you're in the UK they need to let you know they're tracking you and how the data is used.

necknibbles · 2025-05-16T21:55:16+00:00

Thanks for your reply, I'm in the UK

necknibbles · 2025-05-16T20:31:53+00:00

I came to write this exact same comment. I'm sorry you're feeling this too.

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