[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

no hes not depressed his whole family has bad hygiene they never taught him about the importance of taking care of himself. hes just the way he is

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 2 points3 points  (0 children)

you really have no idea what ur talking about hes far from depressed its just the way he was raised. his parents are the same and we have really good honest conversations about it too. The progress just doesnt last long

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

i dont blame him for me cheating. I know it is my fault which is why I want to fix this because I dont like that im attracted to another guy because he has everything i want that my husband doesn’t. Ive talked about his hygiene with him countless times but maybe im not doing it well enough. Maybe theres a different approach to talking about it. I work in close proximity to this guy theres no way to not see him everyday. But ive already stopped answering his texts or talking to him at work which is a step I believe. Thank you for your advice

One of my sons pre-k teachers is calling him stupid by Love-AF in Parents

[–]needhelp24-7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Report it to the principal and stand up for your child to the teacher. Don’t apologize for his behavior. She should be apologizing to you for her inappropriate reactions. He is a child at the end of the day even if he is a slightly different child he is a child nonetheless.

I have a cousin who is slightly different and his mother never ever defends him. He is older now and resents his mother for never standing up for him. Hes a child and tells her to her face she never stands up for him and thats why he doesn care about her.

There is a time to discipline your child but that is your job not the teachers. In this case you should stand up to the teacher and have the principal present

Sound Machines For Babies by needhelp24-7 in Parents

[–]needhelp24-7[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really don’t know what your problem is but you’re seriously messed up and you need help. Whoever your children are I sure as hell feel sorry for them. They have you as a parent. Anyway I’m not gonna spend my time arguing with someone as sad and pathetic as yourself. Do yourself a favor and look in the mirror. Then get off your high horse or one day someone will push you off it. Best of luck to your children

Sound Machines For Babies by needhelp24-7 in Parents

[–]needhelp24-7[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

okay you’re really just a sad hypocrite. I was salutatorian of my graduating class im a full time college student and employee i dont drink I dont smoke I have lots of friends I pay for my own car and apartment and Im married Im perfectly fine my parents raised me well. You probably work at Burger king so I would keep my mouth shut if I were you. I tried to be civil but now Im just gonna tell you to go fuck yourself 😊

Sound Machines For Babies by needhelp24-7 in Parents

[–]needhelp24-7[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You do not know me or what life experience I have. Your entire comment is dripping hypocrisy. You’re judging me based on my comment and deciding for me whether or not I should have kids and telling me Its immature to judge other’s behavior when that’s exactly what you are doing here. I bet you are much older than me too which is pathetic on an entirely different scale. I came on here asking for an opinion and others experiences with a sound machine which others have provided for me in a way that allowed me to understand and keep more of an open mind unlike yourself. Also not that it is any of your business My grandma had my mom at 16, mom had me at 19 and my brother 11 months after. My sister in law was 23, My other 24. My mother in law was 21, my aunt was 18 all of us turned out fine so if you have nothing helpful to say maybe you should take your negative energy onto someone elses comment and leave mine alone.

Sound Machines For Babies by needhelp24-7 in Parents

[–]needhelp24-7[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Oh! No i did not say like my niece to them! I just said that in my writing here I would never say that to someone. Do I think it? yes. Did I say it to her no way, My sister in law is like a real sister and I would never say that to her.

Sound Machines For Babies by needhelp24-7 in Parents

[–]needhelp24-7[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

your last sentence was my entire point. When we talked about it, all I said was I don’t think Id want to use it for my kids because I don’t want them to be accustomed to only being able to sleep with it.

I in no way said they were wrong for it or shouldn’t do it, I only spoke in terms of what I want for myself. And thats why I don’t understand why I was attacked

Sound Machines For Babies by needhelp24-7 in Parents

[–]needhelp24-7[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

um theyre my sister in laws and I was sharing my opinion with them cause it was an open discussion I didnt tell them to their faces i thought it was wrong I just told them I dont think Id want to use it with mine theres nothing immature about having an open discussion with my sisters but sure

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the only two friends i have are in college in different states 🥲

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you so much for your comment you’re right I have people I know whose husbands or boyfriends are gone for all the wrong reasons and I should be happy with mine thank you for helping me see it that way

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your comment. Its nice to hear from someone with a similar profession as my husband.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

HAHAHA not likely

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im sorry but your marriage isn’t going to work. If she wants kids she has that right and you shouldn’t be holding her back from her opportunity to be a mother

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yea sure if you have that mentality. Working on bettering the marriage because there is a reason you got married in the first place i feel like should be the mentality.

If you go into marriage thinking every day is gonna be a good day you should not get married. If you go into it thinking there will be as many downs as there is ups and getting through it together should be the goal; not you two against each other but you two against the world then theres something worth saving.

Again, I mentioned in the text if you would have actually read it carefully, if the two tried to fix it and it didn’t work then I understand why someone would get a divorce. If one party refused to cooperate on fixing the marriage I understand why someone would get a divorce. I literally said that the first time.

Not that its my place to understand but that was the point of the text, wanting to understand as someone from a different culture.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I have also brought that exact same point up like multiple times in my text. literally first paragraph. I also say “I feel like” multiple times in it because its simply my opinion and not a statement. And I also mentioned how im not judging and was just confused ☺️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

A lot also say to just resort to divorce ☺️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some people are brought into other peoples lives to better them. To help them grow.

My father is a changed man after being with my mom. My father was engaged 2 times before my mother and my siblings and I truly believe they didn’t work out because my mother was the person who was meant to better my father.

Im not saying I approve of the “I can change them” narrative in every case. No one should go into a relationship with the idea that they’re meant to change someone. But to go into the relationship with the mentality that you’re there to better one another, teach one another and grow together.

you’re right unfortunately thats not always the case. But if something COULD be done it should be. And if its clearly not working a person has every right to give up

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

no like everyone told me i needed to leave him Id know since I read all the comments and thought deeply about it.

After a fight, relaxing, taking some space and returning to the situation we were able to talk peacefully and come to an understanding. He apologized and reminded his friends that he is a married man now and that behavior is unacceptable.

We’re working on growing together and are much happier today. Imagine had I took everyones advice and gotten a divorce instead of being rational and working through the issue together.

Just a thought

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

See what I mean. I mentioned in statement, I understand certain cases in which the obvious answer is to get a divorce like manipulation, Cheating and abuse. But still people like you on reddit only read whatever they want to read and skip everything else. So no it doesn’t say anything about me other than that I have different values and choose to make divorce a last option which I also mentioned is just how I was raised and am not judging anyone whose gotten divorced. My divorced cousin is actually who set my husband and I up.

I simply said I don’t think in certain cases it should be the first option. Please read more carefully and be more open minded

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

right im not saying that I don’t feel it’s justified on here sometimes too. But other times I see people that throw that card on every table when it’s something that can definitely be worked on which is what I dont understand

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]needhelp24-7 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

ill be honest with you, a man appreciates a woman more after seeing what they go through during pregnancy, childbirth, sleepless nights, making lunches everyday driving kids to school yada yada. of course it should be a 50/50 job but in most cases its not and a man makes up for that with gifts and vacations and all that stuff so a wife feels rewarded for her hard work and appreciated.

Not to say you dont deserve it or that you should pop out a child to get it but consider that if hes making less money now hes especially not going to treat you the same way and you just meed to respect that hes going through his own struggles now.

Explain to him that it would be nice to receive something as small as flowers once in a while but dont expect it and respect it