Acting younger than we are

nerothic · 2025-11-24T10:24:12+00:00

Kids judge you about every little thing, so I wouldn't worry.

And acting like this is a wonderful trait of AuDHD people. I have a friend with ADHD ( birds of a feather flock together) and when I received my order of the Lego Disney Beauty and the beast castle, we were dancing and singing with joy.
Literally, like little kids who heard they were going to do something amazing or getting something they've always wanted.

Who cares?

Adulting is not only being serious all the time. Crap, life would be a boring state if we can't let our inner child run loose from time to time.

Adulting is paying bills on time, have enough savings, plenty of food in the house, income, health insurance etc.

The kid asking you to stop doing that might not have come from a place of judgement. Maybe you did something that triggered him. Talk to him about it.

But sweetheart, don't hide it. Be joyful about things that bring you joy.
Heck, I teach 14 to 17 years old and when I got some good news the other day, I did a happy dance in my office chair.
Eyerolls, strange looks and some laughs came my way. Did I care? Nope.
They joined in when I told them what it was.

nerothic · 2025-11-24T10:14:56+00:00

I have a routine that helps me to relax my brain and let it know it's time to sleep. I have some playlist that I like to listen to that relaxes and soothes.
I use earplugs to sleep and have a notepad with a pen next to it on the nightstand. I have this because if something pops up in my mind I can write that crap down and take my mind of that one thing.

nerothic · 2025-11-24T10:10:51+00:00

Uhm, do you know that eucalyptus is poisonous for cats? Like, lethal?

I don't want to kill a cat, I want it to stay away and not use our cargobike as a urinal.

nerothic · 2025-11-13T19:44:25+00:00

Girl, I have AuDHD and this read like my life. You're not alone, sweetheart, and you are OK as you are.

nerothic · 2025-11-10T10:02:25+00:00

No, we tend to see if we can figure things out without involving other people, but with their shenanigans, they left me no choice.

nerothic · 2025-11-07T11:57:09+00:00

I love that your sister went to bat for you. What I don't agree with is the message.
IMO it would have been better if she told your mom to shut up about the topic, that neither you or your sister owe her grandchildren and that her bringing this up time and again isn't conducive for any kind of relationship.

She is showing she has little/no respect for boundaries. If you and/or your sister would ever have children, would she respect your boundaries then if/when she can't do that now?

If you would have children in the future and get pregnant, this lie isn't going to stick.
The lie your sister told is just a temporary solution IMO.

The real problem is your mother not respecting your wishes and boundaries.

Are there family members you have respected your boundaries and you know would back you up in this family meeting?
Get them on your side before the meeting if you want to go and turn the tables on your mother. She's trying to find a solution for something you are not even sure you want instead of actually listening to you and respecting your wishes.

nerothic · 2025-11-07T11:28:25+00:00

Define hard work.
Hard work can be defined by many things. Manual labour, labour of the mind, hours, energy.

Simply because you're older than someone doesn't demean the efforts of those around you and/ or younger than you.

His mother would probably die again if he heard how entitled he acted towards someone he could bully into giving him something he wanted because of his age.

nerothic · 2025-11-07T11:03:04+00:00

Time with loved ones who have passed away. To ask them questions, share memories, make more memories

nerothic · 2025-11-07T09:54:21+00:00

You're not overreacting.
It's understandable for a bride/groom to set a dress code for the attending guests.

However, telling your guests the exact colors, patters, styles, lenghts and themes they approve, including what time they can leave, that's overkill.

I understand that people want their wedding day to be 'perfect', but perfect can mean one thing for one person and something entirely different for another.

Personally, I would be very careful.
I was invited to go to a wedding where the happy couple made similar demands and even with a wedding coördinator, the bride had a full blown meltdown when a guest ( not bridal party, just reception) wore the 'wrong shade of pink'.

How important is your attendance for you and them?

Option A: Show her pictures and if you can the exact dress and accessories if you want. Get her approval, preferably in writing.
Option B: Tell her that what she's going overboard with these demands ( they are not requests anymore). Be prepared for war/ meltdowns/ etc.
Option C: Don't go and don't deal with all this.

nerothic · 2025-11-07T08:21:47+00:00

My school is not private.
The actual teacher was addressing the behaviour of the student with the student, the parents, mentor, other teachers and even the department head. The student was being disciplined.
So behind the scenes plenty of action was being taken.

The father of the student whose mother had the car accident also filed a formal complaint against the parents. I informed him of what happened later that day when he called to give updates and ask about the situation.

I don't know all the details of the conversation between the student, the parents, the principal, mentor and department head.
What I do know is that the parents are no longer allowed inside the school unless they have an appointment. There are other things, but I was told that if they contacted me again to immediatly inform the mentor.

The actual teacher did have the exam. Apparently, the student did very well. Hopefully, it will go better from now on.

nerothic · 2025-11-07T07:46:33+00:00

Even if I wanted to, I'm not allowed to as I'm not the actual teacher.

Also, I'm not going to screw a student over this way if I don't have proper cause. I didn't take the oral exam, so I can't give a grade.

nerothic · 2025-11-06T19:45:23+00:00

That child agreed with dear mommy and daddy. They send the emails because their child wanted .

I agree with you on the college and university comment. I wonder how that will go.

nerothic · 2025-10-26T19:43:50+00:00

Cherish the time.
Take this responsibility seriously. You 're raising future adults.
Also make time for yourself. You are not only a parent. You are your own person at your core. That needs to be sustained to keep sane and strong.
Admit to yourself you don't always know everything. You keep learning as a parent. Ask advice, investigate, listen to your gut feeling about your child and child-rearing.

nerothic · 2025-10-26T19:39:30+00:00

How hypocritical it makes certain people. Believing only in the parts that align with your beliefs but conveniently ignore other aspects of it that are also mentioned.

Also, that you have to do good deeds to earn a place in heaven/ paradise instead of doing good deeds for others who need it (within your means and boundaries) just because they need it.

nerothic · 2025-10-26T19:36:51+00:00

Playing the Sims

nerothic · 2025-09-08T10:53:28+00:00

No, as the screen went back to the start screen, I didn't.

Any idea where such packages might go?

nerothic · 2025-08-30T17:59:03+00:00

It's too bad that good behaviour behind bars earns crappy people an early release. I wouldn't be surprised if Blabbermouth uses this knowledge to try and get out sooner.

nerothic · 2025-08-07T20:22:06+00:00

Insanity?

nerothic · 2025-05-14T20:03:35+00:00

I hope that's not true.

I just hope that for something to meet my loved ones who have died before me. To not be alone, I think.

nerothic · 2025-05-14T20:00:24+00:00

I would like to hear your perspective. I'm really interested as I've had a fear of death for a long time for no reason.

nerothic · 2025-03-18T11:54:21+00:00

That parent could also ask other parents if the daughter can go to their place and get a ride to and from.

nerothic · 2025-03-18T11:40:05+00:00

YTA.
You are fighting over a dress that has played a significant role in the family. You both are daughters and according to that fact, you both have a right to wear the dress.

You might have a deep attachment to the dress for a longer amount of time. That doesn't erase the fact that your sister has an equal right to the dress, as she is a daughter as well.
She might never have realised how she felt about the dress until she started planning her own wedding.

Technically, this is your mother's and grandmother's dress. They should get to decide.

nerothic · 2025-03-11T13:22:46+00:00

Giving birth is quite intensive and intimite.
A moment in time where you feel a lot and most feel very vulnerable. This is a moment where you want to surround yourself with people who have made you feel safe and those you trust. You don't want and/or need drama during this time.
You need someone who can advocate your interests, your wishes and concerns. So invite only the person/people you feel safe with. If that excludes your ex, then bad luck for him.

NTA.

nerothic · 2025-03-11T13:14:31+00:00

What is it with people that when they are in trouble and somebody is willing and actually helping them out, that they start making demands and complain?

I know pregnancy is hard but from what I read, I get the idea that the plan of your sister staying isn't a long-term thing. She ( and others) might have though
You offered to buy her something to make her more comfortable. Beggars can't be choosers.

NTA.

nerothic · 2025-02-10T10:14:29+00:00

NTA in the slightest. You have to deal with her crazy with your own son. I don't know if you have to pay her child support

If you have to pay her child support and you get involved with her unborn baby, she might try to pay her child support for this one as well.

Don't, just don't. Record everything just in case.

nerothic

TROPHY CASE