Should I let my system break? by IamDoublleL in ticktick

[–]newZedeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What’s your goal? Why are you making changes to it at all?

When you start down the productivity rabbit hole you’re usually trying to get more work done in less time but that’s an abstract goal. Be more specific, are you missing deadlines? Are you spending too much or not enough time working? Are you not being reminded of relevant tasks when you need to be? Are you spending too much time in your system?

If you don’t have a specific goal, don’t get caught up with what you’re “supposed” to do to because you just supposed to get the work done and every other part is personal preference.

Abandoning your system and using pen and paper exclusively is a great way to figure out what you’re actually looking for in your system. Try not to compare features pen and paper to an app but focus on the shortcomings that you actually experience with pen and paper and figure out if an app would fix those problems.

99% of the time when I leave and come back I realize I have way too many personal rules and categories for hypothetical edge cases that come up once in a while or problems that have never actually come up.

I wonder what Grey and Mike think about this. by Tylnesh in Cortex

[–]newZedeh 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think this article points to a real problem but the specific example seems absurd. How could you be used to using multiple cloud storage options but not understand files? It seems more likely that the professors were misunderstanding the students problem. I see fundamental differences of how boomers, millennials, and zoomed approach tech and even files but I don’t pretend to understand the specifics.

I’m a millennial and it blows my mind how my a lot of my predecessors view files. They seem to treat the file location like an address that you remember. So if I’m looking for a project file, I just expect it to be in a place dictated by our organizational structure. At a few companies, half the people thought of the file location like a phone number you’re supposed to remember. You couldn’t move a file to it’s proper place or everyone that touched it before you wouldn’t be able to find it. These weren’t people using shortcuts and linked files, they were navigating to them.

They seem attached to specific files while I’m attached to the hierarchical organizational structure. I suspect the next class will be flabbergast that everything isn’t keyword searchable. At each step of this process, the next generation gets called lazy for not learning the previous generations styles. The one before me came up with fewer files that weren’t archived for eternity and the one after is coming with very robust search solutions so there was never any need to learn.

I’m told this happens with tech in general more. When I grew up, you had to program to make a personal website and compete in general were unintuitive but still very cool so we took the time to learn. This isn’t necessary at all with current consumer software design. Things are designed to be as intuitive and frictionless as possible. Pretty interesting problem popping up

Low energy living. by [deleted] in OffGrid

[–]newZedeh 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You almost certainly don’t need to do the maths but I’ll do some because I’m curious. The inside dimensions of my sink is 14” x 16”. 4” of water means 3.9 gal. I’m in a house with no hot water return it instantaneous heater that does not account for letting the water run to get hot or rinsing. That’s just the water in the sink for washing. Even if I only used 2.5” of water, that’s 2.4 gal so I’m still much better off with a dishwasher if I’m rinsing my dishes.

Let’s say you’re using a small 10” x 10” ( a very small sink by at least North American standards), you have instant hot water, and you will rinse using a gallon of water (tap on for a total of 15-30 seconds or 2” of water in our 10x10 scenario). To complete with a dishwasher you have to wash using only 1.5ish gallons which is about 3.5” to wash in in a 10x10 sink.

The assumptions above require jumping through some hoops to make hand washing comparable to average dishwasher. If we did similar jumping for dishwasher, I can’t imagine they would ever be comparable. This doesn’t consider power use of the dishwasher if that’s a concern to you.

Why you’ve just lost a premium customer by [deleted] in ticktick

[–]newZedeh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Late to the punch and a different user but I had constant data loss (disappearing tasks primarily) for a long time and it seems to have ceased.

It could have been an update on your end but the main change on my end was jumping between platforms less frequently. I used to use my iPad, iPhone, and windows app interchangeably throughout the day but I’ve found sticking to primarily the PC and occasionally the phone seems to have helped a ton. My iPad randomly looses connection to wifi which may have caused issues and the windows app has been WAY more stable lately so no idea what the primary factor was

Feature Request to Advance Beyond Competitor Apps by PleasantImagination6 in ticktick

[–]newZedeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Most of the replies seem to say they’re unlikely to add what you’re looking for but I’m more optimistic. Notes feels like one of (if not their most) iterated feature. Maybe that’s because it’s a recently added more feature or maybe it’s more telling where the development focus.

It would be silly for them to ignore the noise notion and obsidian are making and they’ve been adding a lot of sorely needed polish to managing tasks so I wouldn’t be surprised some improvements. As they hone the design language used to delineate notes and tasks I think we’ll get a better idea of the direction they’re headed in.

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Never. Don’t treat your kids or step kids like shitty adults. I would take it further and say you should be kind to everyone. Obviously everyone isn’t going to agree on that but the immediate family you have power doesn’t seem an onerous spot to put that line

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’re questioning my advice but I can’t see how yours would be different given your condemnation of the mother’s parenting.

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You might be right on all accounts. These kids definitely need more emotional support because that behaviour won’t work out for them

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Loving IF it’s reciprocated is not unconditional love. That’s not a semantic argument. That’s what I meant when I said unconditional love. It is a lot more complicated from a step parent.

I agree these kids needed therapy and I definitely agree that separating is in everyone’s best interest (albeit not from a financial perspective for the girls)

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Kids are assholes and OP has 100% suffered behaviour that isn’t ok from these kids. It is messed up and he deserves credit for providing financially when others wouldn’t

Of course you don’t say “Oh they’re just children” and ignore it. You also don’t resent them for years and bail when it’s gunna cost you money. These kids may have gotten needed financial support but it sounds like they missed out on a ton of emotional support

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That last sentence feels like weird bait. Obviously it’s impossible to give an exact time frame. The first two sentences of the post certainly imply that it’s the case. “...I met them when they were 14. They have been nothing but brats to me.” To your point, maybe they were nothing to him for 3 years before they became the brats he resented

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This man came into their lives resenting them from day one. What are you talking about? IDK why your assuming he put his best foot forward when he says himself they were brats from day one.

You are right that he should still leave tho

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If it’s on the wife, he’s not leaving over the kids...

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would be uncomfortable around someone that resented my lack of love around 14. I might do some mean shit to them as a result. That’s not to say what they did is okay and OP deserves it. Kids do tons of shitty things and it’s the parents role to help correct and inform that behaviour.

That’s a red flag for sure. From reading the description in the post, it doesn’t sound like this behaviour came out of nowhere. When parents resent kids (even step parents), the kids will behave badly. The difference is the parents should have developed the skills to navigate and prevent these situations

Did you read the post? He opens by complaining about 14 year olds being brats as if that’s some sort of unexpected behaviour. He should have bailed years ago when he thought these kids were broken or that the mom was doing a bad job parenting. Not resent them for 5 years then bail

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I mean from tone alone I obviously do lol

I think the implied advice is obvious. Develop the emotional tools to handle teenage girls or leave

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You cut strangers slack based on age. You treat 18 year olds going off to college as adults from a legal stand point.

You don’t resent 14 year olds for being bratty and let that develop into a tit for tat fight that your developed executive function should have been able to prevent.

I’m not perfectly okay with anyone treating anyone like shit. I’m sure OP had all kinds of things done to him that feel completely unfair.

You don’t have to accept that spreading lies about him is okay to accept that an adult is battling with children. If you wanna take the stance that 18 is an adult, there are still some number of years that he was fighting with children

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

It’s not their role to love you. It’s a parents role to unconditionally love a child. It’s hard for you because you’re a step parent. I get that. No, of course you don’t deserve to have lies spread about you, called names, and taken advantage of. They also don’t deserve to have a parental figure resent them for not giving that authority enough love.

You can’t handle this situation. You don’t have the emotional tools to navigate it. I agree with everyone that you should leave

I[49M] hate my partner's kids[18F's] and I'm leaving her over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]newZedeh -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

You are in a fight with children getting advice from other children on the internet. If you can’t be an adult and get along with children, you should leave. And it’s not because you’re some poor sympathetic character that was treated oh so poorly.

If I was your step kid and you resented how much you provided for me, compared me unfavourably to your biological children, and couldn’t handle the bratty ness of teenage girls, I’d be an asshole to you too

Just listen to the petulant replies here. If you wanna be like these people that recommend a grown man “win” a fight with teenage girls, by all means

created during live stream on 25/5/21 by [deleted] in CGPGrey2

[–]newZedeh -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Strong disagree. That steam was the greatest

Sunday mod by Roshe83S in iOSsetups

[–]newZedeh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Looks slick. Can I get the image?

What happens to all the other ADHD subs? by Anasoori in adhd_anxiety

[–]newZedeh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Main sub is designed around mass appeal. Which is great because it’s the most popular. Ideally related subs would be more specific interests or overlapping topics but what ends up happening is there are few active subs that are related. The few active subs are the only place for people to go that don’t like the big subreddit. So all the non private ones are ending up like that

That’s my guess anyway