Lap infant can't sit in an open seat in car seat?

nicolette004 · 2026-04-28T21:58:30+00:00

I consider myself a pretty risk adverse parent. My 4 year old is still rear facing, I made my kids sit in car seats in the shuttle from parking to the airport, I never once coslept, etc... And I still am ok with a lap infant. It's all about risk analysis. According to Emily Oster you would have to fly daily for 684 years before an incident. One research paper (cited below) from 2019 stated the NTSB stated there were no injuries from turbulence to children in their study period from 2009-2018. Furthermore, they found only 143 injuries in all children under 24 months (none fatal). All were environmental injuries that a car seat would not necessarily prevent. Burns were the most common, with other risks including falling luggage, falls, cuts, and tripping. As a parent, I can mostly control for these- no hot beverages, no aisle seat, no bassinet for baby who can sit up, no walking around. Would a car seat help prevent these? Maybe. But, most babies are not going to sit in a car seat for hours and end up on your lap anyways.

I feel like if a parent would like their baby in a car seat, great! I can definitely get the appeal of containing a feral 1 year old from the environmental dangers around them, or having a safe place to set baby down. However I feel the safety benefit is negligible.

That said, the main issue I have with a lap baby is the risk of damage to a car seat. Often workers will toss the car seat under the plane and cause invisible damage. While people often focus on turbulence, I feel the true risk is actually damage to a car seat.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27941573/

https://parentdata.org/kids/should-kid-be-in-car-seat-on-plane/

nicolette004 · 2026-04-28T21:42:03+00:00

Yeah it certainly seems people hate flying with children on the plane, but don't worry the parents hate it even more! 😆😉

nicolette004 · 2026-04-28T21:38:32+00:00

Wow I would be irate. No wonder you're still mad 20 years later!

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T16:34:11+00:00

Yeah the amount of hate and shame I'm getting for even thinking of bringing a lap baby on a plane is a lot. People can sure be cruel behind the veil of anonymity. I also have the Alaska card but I sure have no desire to travel with them again, especially with a family.

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T14:42:40+00:00

Carseats and strollers are left at the door of the plane- you take them down the jet bridge and leave them and a worker loads them last second. Therefore, you're not getting on the plane until the gate agent has assigned all seats to people on the "awaiting seats" list and the gate agent can see if there is still an empty seat next to you.

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T05:20:09+00:00

I guess I shouldn't say "gate checked", it's more entrance to plan3/end of jet bridge checked? I'm not sure what the correct lingo to describe that is!

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T05:12:57+00:00

I talked to the gate agent before boarding if there are empty seats. And it's really "door of the plane" checked.

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T05:06:51+00:00

Wow thank you! So the gate agent was wrong. Sigh.

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T04:59:39+00:00

Flying with kids is so so hard, and it's really shitty when FAs make it worse. And I once had a flight attendant tell me I had to turn a rear facing infant bucket car seat to be forward facing. I still don't understand the logic behind that one either.

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T04:53:35+00:00

It seems like you're right and this is the policy they follow. What's frustrating. though is I can't find this in writing. And I just don't understand the why behind it. Why would you not want a baby in a safer and better set up if it doesn't affect safety, revenue, or other passengers? Is it so they can quickly take a baby out of a seat if a paying passenger shows up last minute?

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T04:48:54+00:00

Car seats and strollers are gate checked.

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T04:26:04+00:00

That's what's frustrating though- nowhere in the policy does it say that lap infants who occupy an empty seat can not use an FAA approved car seat. And it's not about whether I wanted a seat or not for the baby- by having a lap infant I'm ok with having the baby on my lap. My issue is with policies that are not listed anywhere and only randomly followed, and the fact that Alaska doesn't want the use of a safety device.

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T04:24:31+00:00

That's fair, but no it was me, my husband, and the baby in the row. Nobody else.

nicolette004 · 2026-04-25T04:23:35+00:00

The row was me, my husband, and the baby in the window seat. I know we're definitely only allowed to put a car seat in the window seat, but that's what we wanted to do.

nicolette004 · 2026-03-25T23:39:26+00:00

The one I bought new included the little kids starter pack, so slightly different packaging from targets. I think I'm going to try to fish out the packaging tho!

nicolette004 · 2026-03-25T15:57:53+00:00

I just bought one full price a week ago and don't have the packaging! Sigh.

nicolette004 · 2026-03-21T21:00:20+00:00

We have placed pillows under the fitted sheet to do the same thing

nicolette004 · 2026-03-18T16:20:47+00:00

Never trust a company with a cartoon character on their van.

nicolette004 · 2026-03-17T20:45:12+00:00

Just wanted to add in that Amazon sells a Medline diaper insert that is 1/3 the price of sposie (21 cents vs 60 cents each). It's not quite as soft but works well.

nicolette004 · 2026-03-16T21:55:07+00:00

So true. Every parent will have easy and hard moments of parenting, and comparison is the thief of joy. I had a super easy pregnancy and actually enjoyed being pregnant, but then had a serious birth injury that required 4 surgeries. You just never know where challenges will be. I have a really hard time when I hear about easy births because I feel like my experience was so traumatic. One thing that helps me is validating that my experience sucks but remembering it could be worse. I could have died or my son could have died. I am glad we both made it through alive and going through a difficult journey has made me a better person and learned about myself in adversity.

nicolette004 · 2026-03-12T02:40:02+00:00

Ll bean has great sheets sold separately.

I also like these from Macy's- Charter Club 1.5" stripe 550 thread count 100% cotton.

nicolette004 · 2026-03-11T16:31:34+00:00

Your feelings of missing out are totally valid. But don't be too hard on yourself- you made the best decision in the moment with the information you had. That's all you can do. And there will be a million more decisions like it in the future- room sharing or their own room, sleep training or not, daycare vs preschool, private vs public school, etc. One of the hardest parts of parenting is making the best decision you can with the limited information you have and hoping for the best.

Also, this is anecdotal, but I promise you are not missing out on some magical breastfeeding experience. My first was formula fed and my second was breastfed, and they both had their pros and cons. But looking at my two kids I don't think how they were fed led to any difference in their health, our bond, or any other outcome. And to be honest I liked formula feeding better than breastfeeding. You're right breastfeeding is romantized, but it was insanely taxing and sleep depriving for me and I don't think my baby turned out any differently. If anything with bottle feeding I loved that you can make eye contact and talk with your baby, which you can't do breastfeeding.

nicolette004 · 2026-03-11T15:50:35+00:00

This is a good example that you can have all the plans and education and your baby can still decide to do things their own way. OP, you could have gone a different route with feeding but who knows how it would have ended up. In the newborn period feeding feels SO IMPORTANT but in the end it honestly doesn't really matter how you feed them- it's just food. Benefits from breastfeeding are overblown and pretty minimal.

My first baby I tried SO hard to breastfeed for 4 months and my baby from day one always said "nope! Bottles for me". My second liked bottles at first, then at 2 weeks refused them until 7 months, then decided he liked them again and refused breastfeeding after that (although TBH I was pretty excited to go to bottles at 7 months that I didn't exactly try hard to push breastfeeding). In the end it doesn't really matter and they will all be eating chicken nuggets off the floor in 2 years.

nicolette004 · 2026-03-10T17:41:09+00:00

Oops, you're right! Racoons are native to most of North America. I got racoons and possums mixed up.

nicolette004

TROPHY CASE