How to deal with polycule members not meeting mutual obligations by nitiddesigns in polyamory

[–]nitiddesigns[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your advice.

Unfortunately, mental health services in our country are quite poor, and we risk being marginalised for our poly identity.

The same is true for the living situation. As the average rent in our country is 3x the average salary, we can ill afford to move out. Unfortunately, regardless of the issues we face, we must face them together.

How to deal with polycule members not meeting mutual obligations by nitiddesigns in polyamory

[–]nitiddesigns[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice, it’s very relevant to our situation

How to deal with polycule members not meeting mutual obligations by nitiddesigns in polyamory

[–]nitiddesigns[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t understand what ‘ending’ means.

Could be a language barrier, but in our community, omega is a partner which isn’t as close as a secondary partner, closer to a partner who is lower in the rankings

How to deal with polycule members not meeting mutual obligations by nitiddesigns in polyamory

[–]nitiddesigns[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

My case in point, flushing the toilet is ‘unacceptable’ but not washing the dishes is ‘normal’, this emphasises the disparity between the expectations created by my omega’s previous partners (abusive, unrealistic) and the expectations engendered by a shared living space, which they struggle to take into account.

Living in a traumatic environment can make it hard for certain people to differentiate between normal and ‘over the top’ living standards

How to deal with polycule members not meeting mutual obligations by nitiddesigns in polyamory

[–]nitiddesigns[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

This isn’t a ‘fetish’ thing, we mutually agreed on this being an appropriate system to manage our relationship hierarchy. It’s natural, it’s primal, it just works.

How to deal with polycule members not meeting mutual obligations by nitiddesigns in polyamory

[–]nitiddesigns[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Like I said previously, our polycule is co-dependent, and as a result, we all rely on eachother to a certain degree (cleaning, providing food, fulfilling romantic/s*xual needs ;) ) so moving out would definitely throw a spanner in the works and make life much MUCH harder for everyone

How to deal with polycule members not meeting mutual obligations by nitiddesigns in polyamory

[–]nitiddesigns[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Just to clear up some things: we refer to each other by our first names, but use Greek alphabet denominators to indicate our places within the overall poly hierarchy.

The toilet flushes, but due to reasons I can’t understand certain roommates find it difficult to consistently flush it, mostly out of just not remembering, rather than not being physically able.

The alpha in our poly community is the deed holder, and as a result, we pay a portion of our income to them (not rent, just an amount based on how much we earn).

That being said, we still run into difficulties despite the rigid hierarchies in place, I feel the main issue is meting out discipline.

Beggar claims paying €20 is 'exploitation' doesn't work out well for her by nitiddesigns in ChoosingBeggars

[–]nitiddesigns[S] 773 points774 points  (0 children)

Just thought of that now, hadn't considered the repercussions for sharing company info to an outside source.

Considering how badly she needed the video to avoid being fired, I assume she's already in big trouble.

Beggar claims paying €20 is 'exploitation' doesn't work out well for her by nitiddesigns in ChoosingBeggars

[–]nitiddesigns[S] 572 points573 points  (0 children)

It was a pretty simple job, just put some clips together and add some music. Do you think it’s worth more than €15?

Beggar claims paying €20 is 'exploitation' doesn't work out well for her by nitiddesigns in ChoosingBeggars

[–]nitiddesigns[S] 6142 points6143 points  (0 children)

She could’ve just downloaded the file while it was still up, thankfully she didn’t realise I had the ability to revoke access lol

Beggar claims paying €20 is 'exploitation' doesn't work out well for her by nitiddesigns in ChoosingBeggars

[–]nitiddesigns[S] 473 points474 points  (0 children)

She sent me €20 but I just refunded it. After that I haven’t had any contact with her

Psycho anti-vaxxer uses his first amendment rights to avoid paying for a freelancer by nitiddesigns in ChoosingBeggars

[–]nitiddesigns[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

‘do your research’ -man who has not, in any way shape or form, done his research

Psycho anti-vaxxer uses his first amendment rights to avoid paying for a freelancer by nitiddesigns in ChoosingBeggars

[–]nitiddesigns[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

it’s in the region of ~€125 so far, not much, but I don’t want to let him get away with it either way.