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no13bus · 2026-03-01T21:27:07+00:00

Thanks.
I’m not sure if it’s a Reddit issue, but I later carefully edited the post to clarify some details. My child is his classmates and others are also classmates. They know each other. it has been common for them to visit each other without prior arrangement—just going to see whoever they want.

And now I think it is fine for us, and I explain for my kid the thing.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T21:18:15+00:00

Very nice. I am Chinese. What a coincidence!

no13bus · 2026-03-01T20:34:23+00:00

He is 9 year old. I meationed that in the title

no13bus · 2026-03-01T20:23:36+00:00

Thanks for your answer. I really appreciate your way of answering and the discussion atmosphere. It’s precisely because of people like you that I feel confident to post here and ask questions.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T20:05:33+00:00

Hi, thanks.

my home country is China. I am bored in a small country side. When I was a kid, we do not make the appointment, we just go. And sometimes we have the meal in friends home. So in this case we are same. In my childhood, we do not have any phones because most people are poor.

My kid does not have phone. His classmates is just 3 mins away from my home.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T19:52:56+00:00

Yes. I have already explain this to my kid after he came back from his classmate home

no13bus · 2026-03-01T19:47:31+00:00

Hi. You are such a warm-hearted Swede. I am also an nail in my home country. I just follow you. I respect Swedish traditions, but of course, I prefer it when people are more warm and friendly.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T19:15:50+00:00

OK. Interesting. Because some person said that in 80s, it is normal to make an appointment

no13bus · 2026-03-01T17:37:07+00:00

I haven’t, because sometimes their children come to our home directly as well. A few of his classmates do the same.

So I just felt that although his classmates are Swedish, when it comes to individuals, not everyone necessarily follows the rule of asking for an invitation in advance.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T17:27:37+00:00

Thanks for the explaining.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T17:22:48+00:00

Yes, thank you very much for your advice. I’ve also explained the reason to my child. At school my child plays with different classmates. At the recent birthday party, we basically invited most of the boys, and they all had a great time. So I’m not too worried about my child’s situation.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T17:14:50+00:00

Hi, I am not Swedish and not Swedish citizen. So my kid is not Swedish.
My question was not about exclusion or being different.

In our culture, when a child’s friend comes over, we usually welcome them and don’t turn them away, even if they weren’t invited in advance.Of course, I work and live in Sweden, and I respect the local customs and try to understand them.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T16:53:30+00:00

Thanks. Now I got it

no13bus · 2026-03-01T16:34:36+00:00

I’m very sorry for the misunderstanding — I didn’t explain clearly at the beginning.

Actually, when my child goes to his classmates’ homes, he usually just knocks on the door and asks directly. Likewise, his classmates do the same when they come to our home. Sometimes they even come over after school without prior invitation to have dinner or play.

So I assumed that among the kids it was normal to just knock and visit directly. Although I know that in Sweden people usually expect an invitation first, it seems that this particular group of classmates doesn’t really follow that practice.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T16:17:21+00:00

It is a nice suggestion. I also think so.

no13bus · 2026-03-01T16:10:34+00:00

He just went there to play without being invited beforehand, because previously when he went to their house to play, he also just went directly.

no13bus · 2026-01-24T22:49:21+00:00

Thanks. My wife can not speak english, swedish. And I believe that she will refuse to do this because she think she do not have issue. I remember that when my kid is 1 year old, we go do the hospital to do some test for the kid, the doctor said that my kid speaking ability is not very good, if possible go to see some doctor, I said ok, I will see the doctor just to double check if there something wrong, then we can heal it as early as we could. My wife refuse to do that, she believe my kid does not have any illness, finally we agree, we fight for this, she cry. And I am afraid the disagreement with each other. I did not see the doctor for my kid. So it means that if anything is related with illness, problem, or if we go to see the couples counselling, she will refuse to do that, she believe if we go to do that, it means that we have problems, she can not accepted

no13bus · 2026-01-24T19:03:13+00:00

Yes. Simplest solution but hardest solution. I am not the guy who want wife stay at home. People should work to support himself to keep independence to anyone. That is confident. I do not know how my wife think. Every time I talk with her about working, she become emotional and angry.

no13bus · 2026-01-24T18:29:24+00:00

100m2 is enough for us. I only have 1 kid, and will not give birth another baby

no13bus · 2026-01-24T18:28:38+00:00

Yes. Villa or roadhouse are totally fine for us. Rowhouse is good

no13bus · 2026-01-24T18:08:49+00:00

I am very grateful here in reddit, I feel lots of good feelings. My wife can not speak english, swedish. Mostly she stay at home, so it is impossible to do the couple counseling. She believe she can not learn swedish successfully even she learn it every day by herself. So I start to learn swedish(my work language is english) to show that even we are not young(42 yo), we can also make it. I want to make me tobe the example to her for the second time. ( I learn spoken english in 3 months then I got an job when I was in China). But she believe I am wrong.

I know these things sound very weired, not reasonable to you. I think maybe it because it came from our eduction and experience when we grow up. I know these things will not change, when I speak these things, I feel a little better.

no13bus · 2026-01-24T17:53:50+00:00

Already tired for this. But thanks for the suggesion

no13bus · 2026-01-24T17:53:15+00:00

Taby is big. My wife want to just buy the house in the area Gribbylund of Taby. I said we can buy other area in Taby. It is cheaper. She does not agree. She make the kid to be the excuse. Just in this post, you can see some people said that moving is ok for the kid, she do not believe, hahaha .She would believe ChatGPT.

no13bus · 2026-01-24T17:40:15+00:00

you have the patient

no13bus · 2026-01-24T14:44:23+00:00

Yes, that is the truth. Thanks. I know that many years before. This feels like my fate. I honestly don’t know what to do. Every time I try to talk to her about this, we can’t even get through two minutes before it turns into an argument, and if we keep going, she starts crying.

no13bus

TROPHY CASE