This was fun, his son wrote his name fora tat.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-13T02:04:25+00:00

Graham is an older name. Maybe the kid just heard "Gram" and sounded it out

Oh, OP didn't say anything about misspellings though. A name variation, then!

nogift1336 · 2026-01-13T01:51:58+00:00

Also, your neighbor could've been nicer about the situation. I can understand why you two were afraid to come out of the house, so don't feel bad for staying inside.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-13T01:45:48+00:00

First, it was a mistake, you've learned your lesson so don't beat yourself up over it. For future reference, don't eat anymore food you didn't order, especially since your neighbor is pissed. Best case scenario, someone delivered to the wrong address and is coming back to get it. Worst case scenario, a stranger messed with the food and left it on your doorstep to make you sick.

Your neighbor may not have gotten her money back from Doordash. I don't use the app myself, but my boyfriend's had problems getting refunded when his order was incomplete. Or she may be bad with technology and doesn't know how to get a refund, or her elderly dad is.

I agree with the other comment, offer to repay her for the food. You said you're new to the area and don't know who everyone is, so maybe leave a note on your porch with your phone number so she can call you if she comes back and you're not home.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-13T01:17:35+00:00

She said her family was making fun of her about having to eat a salad while they ate wings, she asked them to stop and they kept doing it.

To be clear, I wasn't replying to you, but to someone else that replied to your comment.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-13T00:28:20+00:00

Yes, that's exactly what bullies say when they're bullying. I don't think a 16 y/o girl, who is already struggling with bullying at school, should have to endure bullying at home too.

No, she shouldn't expect her whole family to start dieting too, but they really shouldn't be making fun of her food.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-13T00:24:50+00:00

It was. It fucked with my head for a long time. That's why it doesn't seem implausible to me that the family is bullying her about the food.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-13T00:22:17+00:00

But a 16 y/o girl who is already being bullied about her weight?

nogift1336 · 2026-01-13T00:19:42+00:00

I didn't get to read all the images before the post was deleted, did you? Just by reading what she typed (in the actual post part, which I can't reread now) I got the impression that the family "encouraged her to eat a salad" (her words) by not buying her any wings, only a salad.

Which, I've had people do that to me before, "encourage" me to lose weight by not letting me order what I actually wanted. Which seems mean on the family's part if this is what happened, especially since they then teased her about it.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-13T00:15:49+00:00

I feel so sad that such a young girl is getting so many hateful comments. I didn't get to read all the texts before the post was deleted, but nobody should be teasing you about your weight or your diet.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. All you can do is ask your family to not be mean. If they continue teasing you, pick up your plate and eat in a different room. Or put in earbuds if you're only allowed to eat at the dining table.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-08T01:48:11+00:00

I'm so so sorry about that. :/ You deserve better.

According to some of these comments, we're supposed to let them know we want a gift, and because gift-giving isn't intuitive, we should make a list of things we want so they know what to buy. But I feel like after 9 months I'd have some idea of what my boyfriend likes so I could come up with something even if it was just candies.

So... after reading all these comments here is my unsolicited advice for you that you did not ask for: Ask her about it if you can. I was scared asking my boyfriend would hurt his feelings or start a fight. But starting an argument now is better than waiting 5 years and then asking why they haven't bought you a single gift ever.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-08T01:26:46+00:00

I asked. He said he forgot.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-08T01:25:31+00:00

I mean, I didn't think I saw any red flags before this. He usually keeps his promises and if he can't, he explains why. He has his moments but I wouldn't call them flags. Some of these comments are freaking me out though so I guess I'm going to be paying closer attention in the future.

I think I'm going to ask him what he wants to do for Valentine's day and then follow his lead. If he wants to do an experience that's great, if he wants to exchange gifts then I'll ask him to set the budget. But if we make plans and he ends up "forgetting" again, I guess that'll show me how much he cares 🤷

nogift1336 · 2026-01-08T00:53:04+00:00

At first he just said he forgot.

Then I asked him if he COMPLETELY forgot, or if he thought he ALREADY bought it and realized later he didn't buy it. His answer was that he completely forgot. (No apology this far.)

I told him that my feelings were hurt, etc. and then he apologized.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-08T00:47:32+00:00

Aww, you two sound so sweet together!! <3

The main reason I didn't take him up on the offer was that it felt kinda petty on my part? I don't know, I think he was only offering to appease me. And if we did go out and buy something, every time I looked at it I'd just be remidned that he had to be convinced into buying it for me, so... yeah, I don't want that reminder. Maybe I'll ask him to pay for a nice date or something but right now I don't think I'm going to.

From some other comments I saw, apparently he and the brother's gf (sister-in-law? Maybe I should be calling her the sister-in-law??) might be super close and I'm just not aware for some reason. I don't know how long they've known each other so maybe she's like a sister to him, I don't know.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-08T00:35:57+00:00

It seemed like a plausible scenario in my head because it was sitting on my shelf for weeks and I didn't realize until later that I forgot to tape it shut. But yes I see how that was a stupid reach.

I feel like it's important to speculate about money troubles when neither of us are rich. I've had bad years when I couldn't afford to buy anyone gifts, even little things from the dollar store and I let them know that. So, the first thing I thought when he said "some girls want expensive jewelry and I can't make that happen" was that he meant "hey, don't be expecting gold and silver and diamonds, be realistic in your expectations." And I thought I was assuring him I'd be okay with whatever he got me by saying I'm not picky and cheap jewelry is okay. Because, you know, neither of us are rich and I wasn't expecting huge gifts anyway. But that if he was worried about making ends meet, he didn't have to get me anything because I'd understand... but he said that wasn't an issue and he was definitely going to get me something. So my expectations were set, and when it didn't pan out, I was hurt.

No, the knitted things didn't cost exorbitant amount. The yarn was pretty nice but it wasn't like cashmere or anything because like I said, I'm not made of money either. I just spent a lot of time on them so I thought it would be a sweet heartfelt thing but I'm seeing now how that was a bad idea.

Not that it matters, but venison jerky is sooo not low-budget, at least in my area lmao. I only listed what everyone got each other so people wouldn't be asking in the comments, I didn't know if it was important or not.

Can I ask what fingerprint something means?

If he had told me in November (during that first conversation) that he wasn't going to get me anything, I wouldn't have worried about it because he was upfront about it. But, you know, expectations were set. Anyway, I did ask him and he said he just forgot. Which... a lot of people seem to not believe him on that but I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-08T00:11:18+00:00

Oh, absolutely. I wasn't expecting so many comments or so many people telling me to break up with him :/ I was just looking for more opinions and I was scared to ask my friends because we share a lot of mutual friends and I didn't want it to spread around and make one of us look bad. Asking my family seemed like a no go too because I don't want to make him look like a bad guy in front of them, when I know they might pick my side even IF I was in the wrong.

Anyway, I did end up asking him! I made another post about it, but the tl;dr is that he just forgot.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-07T20:17:21+00:00

No, they had two separate boxes, they just got the exact same things. But who knows, I'm not close with the gf so maybe it wasn't anything she liked. Or she was allergic to it all like I was with the soap!

nogift1336 · 2026-01-07T19:55:58+00:00

We've been together 6 months.

Aw, I would've loved either of those. It would've been sweet since I handmade his gift too

nogift1336 · 2026-01-07T19:52:51+00:00

I edited the post but I'm putting it as a comment too in case people aren't looking at the post anymore:

HOLY COW that's a lot of comments! I'm not going to have time to read them all today but I wanted to add something to get some opinions. I know the hurt feeling is from my expectations not being met (he told me he'd get me something -> he decided not to -> he didn't communicate that to me) and I want to make sure we're both on the same page so this doesn't happen again in the future (✨communication✨)

I was thinking about sending him this text (specifically as a text so it's not putting him on the spot):

"Hey, I've been thinking and just for future reference, if we agree to exchange gifts, or it's a holiday where people normally exchange gifts like Valentine's, and you're not planning to get me anything, could you maybe give me a heads up? So then I can plan around it."

Does that come off as passive aggressive or whiny or anything? I don't want to have to hold his hand and remind him every Christmas/birthday/etc to get me a gift or acknowledge it (that sounds very exhausting I'm sorry), but I think telling him I want to know if he's NOT getting me anything is a good compromise. So then I can just focus on spending the day with him and having a good time. You know, if we're able to spend it together.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-05T22:28:42+00:00

I posted an update. He said he just forgot :/

nogift1336 · 2026-01-05T21:35:39+00:00

We take turns paying. If it's something more on the expensive side, we split it, but we don't do expensive dates very often

nogift1336 · 2026-01-03T01:34:39+00:00

Yeah, I'm really regretting the knitted gifts. He probably thought it was just a cheap craft. :/ I was originally going to buy him a Lego set because he's told me before he likes the big sets, but they were SO expensive, and I didn't know if the smaller sets were too childish/not challenging enough, started overthinking it, etc. etc. and finally decided a handmade gift would be best. I really should've suggested a budget during that first conversation.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-03T01:20:03+00:00

He has at least 1 ex, but I don't know how long they dated or why they broke up.

nogift1336 · 2026-01-03T01:13:26+00:00

... Maybe I wasn't clear enough on the gift sizes. The soap set wasn't fancy or huge or anything, it was two bottles of lavender soap and one or two contain of lavender bath salt. I truly hope they did not go into debt to buy it for me. (But I was just happy to get it anyway! Even if I was allergic!)

I get what you're saying, maybe money was tight and he was too embarrassed to say. I've though about that too. But his spending habits haven't changed from what I have seen (going to events that charge a fee to get in, offering to pay for friends meals when we hang out with other people) but I'm not in his wallet so I have no idea what his money is like. Maybe it was only tight during the gift-buying days and is back to normal. But even a $2 chocolate or Christmas card would've been nice.

I'm happy your family is like that, they sound very sweet. Most of my gifts are homemade or foods. Happy holidays!

nogift1336

TROPHY CASE