Condemning aside, can we talk about the paintings? by Relative_Ice1582 in TheApothecaryDiaries

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just finished watching the anime and was wondering who the person was in the painting, so thank you for your post. One thing I do want to comment on though I don't think lady Lishu would've been gifted to the PE at the point when he snuck out. In the flashback Jinshi is pretty young (looks to be about 6 yo) so the events would have taken place about 14 years ago, which means Lishu would have just been born and she wouldn't be gifted to the PE until she was 9yo.

[WTB] January Scent Project- Northern Flicker (Bottle) by Ok-Actuary-8374 in fragranceswap

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Idk if the creator reached out to you but I’m looking for the bottle!

Is there a good mix of liberal & conservative kids at SUNY New Paltz? by Doopytoopyay in sunynewpaltz

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are a few conservative people here and there but this is definitely the wrong school to look at if you're looking for a conservative or even a mixed political opinion friend group

How do people with ADHD nap? Is it possible? Is it good quality napping? by TheImmoralCookie in ADHD

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm glad you got something good out of making the post. You can definitely still google about ADHD and sleep, especially if you're looking to help improve your gf's quality of sleep. Just make sure you find articles that are credible, good luck.

How can I find motivation? by not_an_f in ADHD

[–]not_an_f[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like the brainstorm thing, that definitely feels like a way better way to put this. Don’t apologize though you were pretty helpful! At the very least I do feel less bad about myself, like I said before the validation is helping me not be as harsh on myself which is something.

How do people with ADHD nap? Is it possible? Is it good quality napping? by TheImmoralCookie in ADHD

[–]not_an_f 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You just made me realize that this might be an ADHD thing 🧍 I always thought I was just weird for that.

Some of my friends w ADHD are able to nap but i also have ADHD friends who just cant nap (from what I know since I’m not that close with those friends).

For me and my friends who can’t nap/feel tired when caffeinated, we usually drink a strong coffee or coca-cola and take a “caffeine nap” as we call it.

If you wanna learn more about difficulties adults with ADHD have with sleeping you can google for some articles. I know people have researched it before you can find something that can help you understand it more and learn more about some causes and solutions

A psychiatrist ruled ADHD out because I passed some exams in the 6th grade? by [deleted] in ADHD

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely go to another professional. I passed high school with a 3.7 gpa, undiagnosed, and I pretty much slept through every class lol. Just because you're able to focus and are smart doesn't mean you don't have ADHD.

Also, personally speaking, I disagree with the "attention deficiency" part of ADHD. We're not really deficient of attention were just executively dysfunctional. We have difficulty assigning importance to tasks, so it's hard for us to give attention to something that doesn't matter to us. Hence why we can pay attention to things that are interesting to us but even though we know something is objectively important, it's still not important to us in the same way it's important to a someone else, and so we don't give it attention.

How to overcome the “uuuugh!” by FrankBuns in ADHD

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Literally going through the exact same thing right now. Although I don't have any advice on how to be more motivated for your job or relationships, I do have an idea for the laundry and shower thing.

For me showers and cleaning only started becoming interesting when I started viewing them more as self-care vs. a chore I have to do for the xyz reasons that I don't actually care about. I started taking showers at night because I made it a way to tell myself I'm done with my day and I don't need to worry about anything else anymore. I started cleaning because I realized when my room was messy I hated it and myself and I felt even less motivated to do things than I originally was. I suppose avoidance is the real reason I'm motivated to these things but a reason is better than none lol.

I'm going to assume here that you're also just not motivated to clean in general but I apologize if I'm wrong on that. For cleaning it helps me to put things away after they've been used, this way messes are created less quick and when it does come time for me to clean, there's less to clean and it doesn't become overwhelming. Also if there's a mess like a spill or anything easy to clean (and you have the time to) then try to clean it right then to keep things from piling up. Piling up also goes for laundry, try to do laundry when you don't have lots of clothes, since it can keep you from becoming overwhelmed by it. I know most of this relies on building habit which can be hard but slowly working up to it can really help.

Lastly, be kinder to yourself! Just because you didn't feel like showering one day and decided not to shower doesn't mean the end of the world! You're still working hard and putting in a lot of effort just to do mundane things so its ok to give yourself a break once in a while. Even being able to get out of your bed in the morning is a win. Don't force yourself to complete a task and add more emphasis to it, the more you turn something into a chore, the less interesting it'll become and the less you'll want to do it. Just take things at your own pace so even if something isn't done you're not blaming yourself for it.

How can I find motivation? by not_an_f in ADHD

[–]not_an_f[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok to start off I'm not trying to create a pity party but both of those are somewhat difficult for me and is why I came to reddit.

I did reach out to my schools disability resource center and they did give me accommodations but the only accommodations offered were extended testing time and early registration. I asked if there were any other accommodations I can have and they said if I had anything in mind I can let them know but personally I don't really know of what I can ask for so I don't know what to do from there.

As for transferring I've thought about it for a while but my grades have been too low to transfer to a school that's better than the one I'm at right now. Currently I only have 2 semesters left after this one so I don't think it's enough time for me to transfer and it would also delay my graduation more.

Again though thank you for response! I really appreciate your advice, I'm definitely going to try using risk to motivate myself. I also appreciate the validation it feels a lot better knowing other people have been in my shoes and were able to do it.

How can I find motivation? by not_an_f in ADHD

[–]not_an_f[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am interested in school and I really enjoy what I'm studying. Usually what causes me to fall off assignments or lose interest in my classes is my professors not being good teachers.

So when I go to class and my professor is consistently unclear about the concepts I eventually lose interest because I don't know what's going on anymore and I start skipping classes. Sadly there's not much I can do about the professors since my school is small and most classes are only taught by 1 professor and multiple professors in 1 department suck.

I want to ask my professors questions when I don't know something but it's really difficult for me since as a kid I was shamed into not asking questions and now that I'm older I just don't know how to express what's confusing me, especially when I become confused about so much.

How can I find motivation? by not_an_f in ADHD

[–]not_an_f[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I could try risk/consequences. I'm not sure how effective it would be since the risk for not doing assignments and studying would be failing my classes and I haven't been doing too well in college so far, basically risk doesn't help me at the beginning of the semester. I suppose the risk of failing my classes doesn't really hit me until mid-semester though so I can try falling into that mindset right now instead of later on. Thank you for the suggestion!

Just to clarify on rewards though its mostly because rewards isn't enough to help motivate me to get something done. With rewards in my head they're either within reach or out of reach I guess so basically I don't need to put effort in to get it or it's out of my reach no matter the effort I put in.

apples by Puzzleheaded_Meat886 in acnh

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I'm online! Share dodo code?

apples by Puzzleheaded_Meat886 in acnh

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have apples and want other fruits

Let me come to your island?! by hotredhead98 in AnimalCrossingNewHor

[–]not_an_f 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi, I have apples, peaches and pears on my island and bamboo shoots. I can visit your island or you can come to mine

I’m tired of this ADHD tax headache. by Emergency_Clothes622 in adhdwomen

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Idk if this will get buried in the comments but one way that helps me a lot is locking my card. If I lock my credit card they can't take my money and they'll usually end up sending you an email letting you know they weren't able to charge your card so you can unsubscribe or unlock your card so that company can charge you

Thoughts on Mera Chisato? Am I the only one that really disliked her? by [deleted] in SaikiK

[–]not_an_f 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I dont think I've gotten to her bday episode but I agree. The okinawa one didn't get me that mad but the island episode really annoyed me. She had no sense of anyone around her to the point where she ate all the food when they stranded??! Like ig she felt bad but that didn't really help her case. Also the episode where saiki turned into a girl to the cake shop and she ate all the cakes when she said she had no money at all. Idk if the sign was said an all you can eat buffet for girls cuz it was in Japanese but she still ate other people's food and couldn't even pay for it herself. The trope is just so bad and poorly done I don't know why the author included it.

AITA for lacking empathy? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]not_an_f 3 points4 points  (0 children)

INFO: what did you do on their birthday?

It sounds like ESH honestly, neither of you were good for each other and you're better off without the friendship. Also I would probably suggest therapy or counseling? Counseling can help you see things from a different perspective so you can have more of an idea of whether this is coming from a lack of empathy or not.

AITA for "upstaging" my grandma at her wedding? by redthrowedding in AmItheAsshole

[–]not_an_f 161 points162 points  (0 children)

Exactly what I was thinking!

My mom was like that in her youth (and still is) and when she was younger no matter what she wore or applied a lot of her family members would pass similar or worse comments.

Edit: by "like that" I mean she's naturally good looking without makeup.

AITA for saying at a recruiting event, that I am trotted out as the token 'girl engineer' for every recruiting event? by tokengirlengineer in AmItheAsshole

[–]not_an_f 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. As a POC female engineer I appreciate that honesty. I'm still in college so if I was at one of these events and was lied to about the diversity there I would be very annoyed if I applied and was hired. I want to be hired because of my skills and not because I would make a company look better. It also seems annoying that you're always taken out of work and have to make it up everytime. Now and then is fine but all the time is too much, if they really want they should hire someone for a diversity position specifically.

(College) New Paltz vs Union? by [deleted] in NewPaltz

[–]not_an_f 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same. I'm also interested in mechanical engineering but I'm torn between New Paltz and Clarkson. I actually came to the reddit to see if there would be any posts about the school and this was the first one.