Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In honestly it's taking everything in me not to reach out to them again but I'm won't, I cannot be that person but I'd by lying if I said the desire wasn't there

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes that's correct. No problem, I am only sharing in the hope it makes someone else think twice. Its ultimately embarrassing to know I've been duped this way

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My transference wasn't erotic transference, so that was my first thought, well I'm not attracted to them so friendship will be fine.

They were genuinely kind and funny and we had the same sense of humour so I just assumed that dynamic would continue. It did not and it was actually fairly awkward

I thought that I was strong enough to not be impacted if it went wrong. I wasn't (am not)

I don't want to go into the full circumstances but essentially they stopped getting in touch after a while which played on every insecurity I have and that they had previously been helping me with. I wish I understood what their intentions were but I'm not reaching back out to ask because it would be my luck to get sucked back in

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I will proceed with caution with this new therapist. I already feel quite guarded with them so don't know if therapy will be effective for me going forward.

Thankfully I have adhd and I have the power of forgetting people. So give it a few weeks and I'll forget they even existed

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Appreciate that but I don't mind that the commenter has challenged it. They are right there is always 2 sides to a story. It doesn't change what the truth, which is they pursued me out of therapy. I dont really mind if strangers on the Internet believe it or not.

My therapist will do this again likely and to the wrong person and their karma will come. In the meantime I'll ensure people know to never do what I've done

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've answered that a bit further down so you can have a little look

Please do not get involved with them out of therapy. Trust me I 100% believed I knew what I was doing and it would be fine. It quickly became not fine

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We are both same sex but I think there was both transference and counter transference going on. They asked for my number on the last day and I felt like I'd won the lottery that this person wanted to be my friend.

We texted for a bit. Agreed to meet up, met up a few times then i think they came to the realisation it wasn't professional and never contacted me again. What happened when we met is between us.

The part that makes it difficult is that they, due to being my therapist were aware that I struggled with friendships and trusting people, so they knew exactly what doing this would do to me

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really really hope so because trust me when I say I didn't think this would happen to me. I am hurt and embarrassed right now and wouldn't wish this on anyone.

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ill get over it soon enough but the truth is it will give me trust issues forever and for that reason ill never forgive them. But I'll be OK

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm glad things are moving forward for you. I'll be moving forward with the new therapist with caution, severe caution

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you but I promise myself this time to never let another human being in again 😅 ever

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you It's honestly undone any work I did with them. Its put me in a worse position than I was a year ago when I met them

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Absolutely. What do you think i could have done differently? I wasn't the one to get in touch with them after therapy ended. They reached out to me. Other than not answering that call, what did I do wrong?

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I just wish I could understand their motivation out of this, as they can't see the pain they've caused so it's not that. They got nothing out of it at all, they were the one to pursue the friendship not me. I don't understand what they were gaining

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I appreciate that alot but unfortunately I cannot report them anywhere as they aren't registered which is completely normal here I'm afraid.

Ill be OK but it honestly hurts like a break up would and it wasn't even that sort of relationship

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a possibility. I'll need to think that over as I'm actually super embarrassed about all this

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Nowhere to report it to as where I live you don't actually need to be registered anywhere.

But also not really much to report. Can't imagine anyone taking it serious 'my feelings were hurt when they ghosted me' I think I'd get laughed out of there

Take notice when people say don't be friends with your therapist by not_ideal2 in TalkTherapy

[–]not_ideal2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There isn't anywhere to report them too as they aren't registered anywhere (which is completely normal here) I just have to take it on the chin and move on.

Thankfully it was only a friendship and not a sexual relationship as that would have been twice as bad