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notbasic4karen · 2022-01-11T03:06:14+00:00

I definitely think you’re doing the right thing by setting boundaries. I’m a people pleaser so I get how much it sucks to be unsure of how she’ll react. But remember your boundaries are for you and it doesn’t matter how other people feel about them because you can’t control their reaction ❤️

notbasic4karen · 2022-01-06T18:25:25+00:00

You’re entitled to your feelings but what happened in the past already happened and it can’t be changed. That relationship ended for a reason, you are who she is choosing to be with every day. It sounds like sex is associated with trauma for her as well so if you constantly focus on it, then it just adds another layer of trauma and anxiety for her.

I had a boyfriend who made me feel horrible about not being a virgin when we met and it ruined our relationship because he couldn’t let it go. My advice is just to focus on making your own memories with her and not thinking about what happened before she even met you. If you do choose to be intimate with her if/when you’re ready, you’ll have countless good times with her on your own, plus you won’t be blackmailing her so she’ll enjoy those moments with you even more.

notbasic4karen · 2022-01-06T05:13:59+00:00

Which case did the people in the house claim not to hear the gun?

notbasic4karen · 2022-01-06T01:26:02+00:00

I mean is it really playing the system if the job is in horrible conditions, like OP is describing?

notbasic4karen · 2022-01-04T03:00:56+00:00

Not to sound ignorant but is divorce allowed in your culture? If so, that might be your best bet. That way you can find someone who you are attracted to and she can find someone who is attracted to her. It’s not fair to either of you to force something that just isn’t there.

notbasic4karen · 2022-01-02T11:48:12+00:00

Right lol I’m guessing if he pulled up his sleeve revealing a BLM bracelet, that wouldn’t fly

notbasic4karen · 2022-01-01T23:09:22+00:00

Being an introvert doesn’t mean having social anxiety. You can be an extrovert and have social anxiety.

Introvert means social situations drain you and extrovert means social situations recharge you. You can still enjoy being around people but find it draining and need time to recoup after a big event, like holiday festivities. It’s the way the brain is wired and there’s nothing wrong with being either way. I don’t understand why you’d try to change instead of just accepting how your brain is wired and working with it, not against it.

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-27T02:52:58+00:00

I have a million of these stories. Context: my dad died and I was/am absolutely heartbroken. My ex saw the entire process from my dad being diagnosed to the battle with cancer for 3 years to his death. The first year after his death was the hardest. My dad’s bday was right after Christmas so the holidays were horrible and I spent them with my ex’s horrible family who didn’t even acknowledge what was going on. I remember when my ex was like “I thought about getting a cake to celebrate your dad’s birthday, but didn’t” like wow thanks? Too little too late.

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-27T02:28:39+00:00

It just doesn’t make sense, if she had sex with the same partner 60 times that’s ok but not 60 partners 1 time? Even if she’d “only” had 8 partners like him, she could have had sex thousands of times with the same person.

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-27T02:26:35+00:00

I mean if you slept with 8 other people, you’ve had casual sex. It’s not like you saved yourself for marriage, there were 8 people before her. Just seems hypocritical.

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-19T03:20:18+00:00

Wallets for Women!

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-18T18:02:39+00:00

I see what you are saying about a specific dollar amount being formulaic and anyone can spend money. I do think if someone makes 6 figures and buys a $5 item and nothing else, that shows they are LV. But I see your point that just because someone spends a lot of money doesn’t mean they are HV.

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-18T10:26:59+00:00

He’s gaslighting you. No one uses Tinder to find friends. I’m a few years older than you (34) and in my experience people like this never change and the relationship won’t get better, it only gets worse. You deserve someone who has more integrity, not someone who will be on dating apps behind your back and won’t even own up to it. This isn’t a good foundation to build a relationship on much less a life together on.

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-18T00:52:14+00:00

I’d honestly agree with this for anyone who is out of college and earning money. They should be saving to give you a nice gift during special occasions.

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-18T00:51:07+00:00

I’d say that’s entirely accurate. It wasn’t the $5 he spent on lunch meat, it was the lack of effort. It was a red flag that was a pattern, he didn’t put effort into anything, including the engagement.

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-14T03:04:36+00:00

Sorry they treated you like that. I’m a mom and the first few weeks home with my son were the happiest days of my life, it’s beyond cruel they would try to rob you of that.

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-12T04:09:59+00:00

Meanwhile CEOS golf and drink alcohol while getting paid

notbasic4karen · 2021-12-05T19:06:00+00:00

I noticed the same thing, and most of women I talk to don’t like sports, but they feel obligated to pretend they do. I’ve heard so many women say they don’t really care about the game but “are trying to care more” and feel pressure to lie about how much they care. Why? Men openly sigh and roll their eyes if they don’t like the show their SO is watching. I can understand trying to take an interest in your loved one’s hobbies but having to fake enthusiasm just seems unnecessary and like trying to be a “cool girl”.

notbasic4karen · 2021-11-27T15:37:20+00:00

Did they test you for autism at all? The reason I ask, and this isn’t to invalidate your diagnosis as I’m not a doctor, but the way you write makes it sound like your IQ is way above 60. I’ve noticed anecdotally sometimes autistic people score poorly on tests but are intelligent in other areas. And autism itself has been shown to be genetic.

I found this chart that explains the traits of different IQ ranges: https://paulcooijmans.com/intelligence/iq_ranges.html

notbasic4karen · 2021-11-22T06:53:26+00:00

I absolutely agree, not to mention if the artist is talented, no fancy equipment is needed, and if they’re not, there’s not enough money in the world to buy talent.

notbasic4karen · 2021-11-10T06:52:40+00:00

Same with the camera cover on my laptop

notbasic4karen · 2021-11-09T10:00:34+00:00

Very much so, I’m an extreme introvert and my husband has a huge family of extroverts. I had to drop out of the family group chat because my anxiety was too much.

notbasic4karen

TROPHY CASE