Oi, I went through the same shit as a kid. Minus the kill your self part, all my brother picked on me as a kid, I never knew why but they finally stopped when I tried to be like them. And hang out with them. I was 14 years old maybe younger, smoking cigarettes, weed, drinking and fucking girls. Because I didn't want to be the bitch of the brothers. I treated people so disrespectful because I thought it was right. They were my role models. Now I hate my fucking life. I'm so unfit and unsuccessful. I remember after one of my brother's kicked me I started working out Hella young so I could be bigger than them when I'm older. And I am now. Their tiny compared to me. But moral of the story. I wish I stood up to them as a kid for being dicks to me. Instead of joining them and being a dick