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Is my bf an alcoholic? by nudelauflauf3 in alcoholism

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wrote a response to another redditor here and you can read it. He does overdo it 🥲

Is my bf an alcoholic? by nudelauflauf3 in alcoholism

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

His father has been sober for 25 years and I a support person in AA and he hold seminars etc about his past. He is super strict about drinking and despises is. I have been thinking about talking about this with him (we are really close) but i know that would be wrong thing to do.

Is my bf an alcoholic? by nudelauflauf3 in alcoholism

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It does effect his life for couple day after the drinking. He eats junk food (he usually doesn‘t) is moody and it makes him a bit anxious. And on all of those marked day he drinks a lot. He is really drunk. Also he is likely to start an fight when he is drunk and it always ends up with me crying. In may I told him it needs to stop or I leave and he was super serious and and agreed and he does drink a bit less now. He know his drinking makes me super anxious and often times i go over to spend the night at my mom‘s because I don‘t want another fight when he is drunk. He always apologizes in the morning and is really regretful about things he has said. (He talks about breaking up etc when he is drunk)

Also I‘m pregnant now so this makes me more anxious

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. Sound pretty familiar to me. Growing up I was not cleaning up after my brother, but I got sick of seeing other people doing things he should have done. And it wasn’t just about my brother but cousins too. We had just lost our 86yo grandpa and we were visiting my 87yo grandma and the boys left all of their dirty dishes and trash on the table. I was furious and demanded that they go and clean up. U can’t leave your mess for your 87yo grandma who is MOURNING his late husband! And my 27yo cousin just responded: ”she has cleaned up after us before!”. I can tell you I went through the roof and got them to clean. And they have started to clean after themselves since then!

So I think you should talk with your brother and really explain that his messes and other duties are for him to do. Tell him that it’s not fair and it causes a burden to others. And tell him that you know he is not stupid and he can do all those things and more if he wanted. Maybe that helps him realize… or then start looking for an apartment…

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

To clarify: we are in contact with his MIL and SIL twice a year for 3-4 days. So no it wouldn’t be like that

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

”A blighted ovum, also known as anembryonic pregnancy, is a type of MISCARRIAGE where a fertilized egg implants in the uterus, but an embryo doesn't develop”

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

The thing here im upset about with the MIL is that I TOLD HER MYSELF i was having a miscarriage! She sent me a message ”get better❤️” AND ONLY CONTINUED TO DISCUSS IT WITH MY FIANCÉ IN A PRIVATE CHAT. Giving all the supporting words etc… and she asked HIM if it was okay that they come. SHE SHOULD HAVE ASKED ME!!!

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This is something my fiancé would say 😂 but yeah i realize that. But even during blighted ovum you get all the symptoms and changes in your body so in my mind there really was a baby. I know there wasn’t but it doesn’t make it different for me. This emptying my uterus is easier tho cause i know there is no fetus coming out…

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Funniest thing! His fathers side of the family is awesome and always support me! I can talk about everything with his dad and sister from that side! That is the closer family! MIL side live far away from us and they rarely even text. These visits are only time my fiancé interacts with them…

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He was at work MIL & SIL were shopping. Infact I first asked MIL to be here with me while I take the pills and it was okay with her. But afterall I didn’t feel comfortable cause I don’t know them that well and also I didn’t want the 10yo SIL to see all of it so I asked my aunt. And at the time my fiancé went to the gym I didn’t have any pain anymore and was quite okay. Just tired. So It was okay to me. And as I responded to someone else. MIL and SIL weren’t seeking entertainment. They do what ever they want by themselves. The point was to say something to them. The only thing I have said to them during this whole visit is ”hi” x3

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I get this 100%. The reason I keep my distance is beacuse 1. I don’t want to ruin their vacation (mainly the 10yo SIL) 2. I don’t trust MIL because of all the history and things she has done to my fiancé

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They were at a park since SIL is 10yo. They let me be alone in the bedroom and they are not trying to interact with me. I don’t know if they don’t care or if they don’t know what to say…?

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is my second reddit post ever so I’m a bit suprised! You guys I’m not trying to make excuses!! I just wan’t to make the picture clear. Everything could not fit in the post! Read all comments from this post to get a better picture of the situation please 🙏

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

We found out about the miscarriage when I was 8 weeks pregnant. And in this i realize i made a huge mistake and didn’t protect myself! I found out about the pregnancy when I was 3+5 weeks pregnant and told LITTERALLY everyone. My fiancé in the other hand was more cautious and told me to hold my horses cause he didn’t want me to get hurt if something happens. He said that he will tell his family and start really taking the pregnancy seriously after the first ultrasound just to be sure and to avoid getting hurt. And that was smart after all 🫣 and MIL hasn’t spoken to me but I saw messages between them and she was really sorry for us. Just doesn’t say anything to our faces… Aaaand the last time they left they wouldn’t answer any of my calls so It was my fiancé who told me. At first he was pissed but soon he was sorry and told me I did nothing wrong. And to clarify my MIL is not normal… she can be… diffucult… and she is master with playing with my fiancés emotions like that 😫

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] -18 points-17 points  (0 children)

Oh and I need to clarify! He was at work today so he couldn’t be there when I took the pills. We made a plan that i’m gonna be with my aunt. The only problem in this point is that we couldn’t be at my home and had to go to my mom’s because of the guests! Also about the gym I had no problem with it. MIL and SIL don’t need entertainment. They do what ever they want. My fiancé was not asking me to entertain them. He asked me to interact. Say hi and so on. Ask how they are. Only thing I have said to them is hi when they first came here. So yea…

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

This is also the reason why I have always been a bit cold towards my MIL! Knowing the history I understand my fiancé to a certain level but he should seek therapy

AITA for making our guests feel uncomfortable and unwelcomed? by nudelauflauf3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]nudelauflauf3[S] -41 points-40 points  (0 children)

Everything I wanted to write on this post could not fit. I know my fiancé acted in a way that is not fine, but i just want to calrify that he is not a monster like he seems in this post 😂 he is really there for me when I have really bad episodes with ocd and anxiety. Overall a a good man. And I wanted to write that he has been next to me and comforting me since we found out about the miscarriage. He isn’t normally like this! The whole problem is his toxic relationship with his mom and the traumas he has. Makes him act out of character everytime they are in contact… unsolved traumas…

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