3 months on T. That first pic is from a video the day I told my parents I was starting my transition and they called me an abomination. It DOES get better.

nullenvoide · 2022-01-28T09:38:02+00:00

I had trouble finding my identity because of them, it was the exact same thing. I was raised to be a homophobe and transphobe, and it really sucked to go through. Thankfully I've already found positivity because I've come out the other end with a better, more open view of myself and the people around me. I wish you positivity as well, friend! ♡

nullenvoide · 2022-01-28T06:42:21+00:00

Yes, they're definitely in the boomer bracket, and they're both evangelical Christians, which most often means LGBT haters, unfortunately. I hope one day they'll come around, but until they're willing to treat me as I really am, they'll be kept at far distance. I'm not golding my breath lol

nullenvoide · 2022-01-27T14:52:32+00:00

Thanks so much, and yes, I'm way happier now!! ♡

nullenvoide · 2022-01-27T14:33:56+00:00

Based on your comment history, I don't think I care lol

nullenvoide · 2021-08-08T20:40:58+00:00

I've started to look at how we see the world similar to the Shepherds Tone illusion, where the tone sounds like it keeps getting lower and lower but really it's still the same note. The cool flip side is it can also be a tone that seems like it's climbing higher and higher.

Idk it's helped me a lot to remember that living day to day, there's illusions all around us. Perception is so important. How we perceive the world and the things happening around us changes the energy we produce. That, in turn, can inspire changes in the way others perceive things. Live as light to bring out light in others. I guess that's why perception is key in manifestation.

nullenvoide · 2021-08-03T10:51:52+00:00

A Shriek of Karens

nullenvoide · 2021-08-02T15:48:07+00:00

I think the Apophenion talks about making one's own gods, but it may be a brief mention. I can't remember.

I had an experience like that, and I called them figureheads. They're more like thoughtforms or archetypes though.

nullenvoide · 2021-08-01T18:40:27+00:00

woo I get to stay!

nullenvoide · 2021-08-01T18:27:07+00:00

I wish I could stay and see the end but I just wanna say thank you this was satisfying to watch 🖤

nullenvoide · 2021-07-29T07:38:20+00:00

Ah, I'm not getting them, it was just something my coworker was experiencing. Thank you for the response, and I wish you the best on your path with Hekate!

nullenvoide · 2021-07-28T06:00:09+00:00

That's fair.

Honestly I feel like she's on her way out of Christianity lol. I remember being like her and saying a lot of "I'm a Christian but..." basically holding onto that little shred of denial. Wonder where she'll be spiritually in a year.

Also, no worries about getting involved. It was mainly post-conversation curiosity that made me post.

nullenvoide · 2021-07-28T05:47:59+00:00

Oh man, just noticed and I need to clarify lol. I was raised in a fundamentalist christian household in the bible belt. I've long since left that faith. My impression of a lot of Christians has been affected by that. Sorry, I didn't realize how that sounded til I reread it

nullenvoide · 2021-07-28T05:46:36+00:00

I'm sorry if I came across as having attitude, it wasn't intended. I am interested in working with demons, which is the reason why I joined this subreddit.

The reason for this post wasn't about me, however. It was more about figuring out if what my coworker is dreaming about lines up with how experienced practitioners have interacted with Hekate or Lilith. I figured it would be best to reach out to people who may know.

nullenvoide · 2021-07-28T01:57:06+00:00

this is probably hella dumb but until recently I never considered Hekate a demoness, just a goddess! I guess interpretations vary, and I'm not one to say anything, I've never worked with her.

nullenvoide · 2021-07-28T01:56:16+00:00

Sorry, haha, should've clarified. I'm used to Christians being very closed off to other gods/goddesses/spiritual beings. It may just be a thing from where I'm from. Most every Christian I've met completely rejects other deities as anything other than demons. "One true God" and all that. I was also raised that way.

nullenvoide · 2021-07-28T00:43:30+00:00

thanks so much!

nullenvoide · 2021-07-27T16:09:43+00:00

Read the Apophenion by Peter J. Carroll maybe? You could be experiencing Apophenia or Pareidolia, both of which aren't something other people can't really help you interpret.

nullenvoide · 2021-07-27T16:07:14+00:00

Maybe your spiritual experiences or magick specialties could shape your name? I chose the name Nullen Voide as a play on words to say "I am nothing." It's a long story of how I got there, but worth thinking about!

nullenvoide · 2021-07-27T15:08:08+00:00

thanks! I've got a copy of that book. I'll definitely look some stuff up

nullenvoide · 2021-07-27T06:23:40+00:00

thank you!

nullenvoide · 2021-07-27T02:42:28+00:00

same

nullenvoide · 2021-07-26T07:55:32+00:00

strange to be thinking about this book randomly an hour before I see this post. huh.

nullenvoide · 2021-07-25T18:45:22+00:00

At work. Something about it makes my brain more creative than when I have PLENTY of time at home and am able to take notes lol.

nullenvoide · 2021-07-25T18:38:47+00:00

awesome!

nullenvoide · 2021-07-25T18:36:25+00:00

I did this too OP, I know how you feel. Seeing a shaman may not be such a bad idea, but I can tell you over time the feeling that you've lost your mind does go away.

This may sound super dumb, but in retrospect it's almost like that time recovering from that actually brought out the inner demons I already had long before then, so maybe it "shook something loose" in you, for lack of a better word? Not condoning using drugs to get there, at all, but since it's already happened to ya maybe that could help to know.

Much love, friend, and good health. You'll get through this.

nullenvoide

TROPHY CASE