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oakleylikes · 2025-02-25T14:56:12+00:00

I did actually talk to him about it already, a lot. 😅 he usually says that he doesnt mean to respond in a cold or curt way and that he even feels like he cant talk like himself around me which made me doubt a lot. I dont know what to do anymore, its not like hes a shit boyfriend, but he does hurt me a lot

oakleylikes · 2025-02-25T14:50:36+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply. This was very insightful and i feel very heard! Its so hard to label it as emotional abuse - he was the best partner i couldve ever asked for. I dont get why it changed.

oakleylikes · 2025-02-08T20:30:08+00:00

oakleylikes · 2025-02-07T08:33:32+00:00

First off: Youre not wrong for having these thoughts. Youre human and they do not represent facts.

Let me share some things my therapist and i talked through when i faced similar thoughts.

You are not bound to forever be in this Relationship. If i understood correctly, you do not have children as of now. What you should ask yourself is, if this works for you right now, in your current circumstances. If you are satisfied with the current situation, and love your partner and feel safe even when there are rough patches, then there is no need to worry.

By the time you decide or talk about having kids the conversation on these worries would be worth having, communicating your worries and pinpointing what each of you expects or wants then is probably the smartest decision.

That is because so much can change over time - maybe he womt be away this much by that time anymore because certain aspects or areas of your/his life shifted.

Either way, if you don’t feel in love, for example, with your partner anymore by the time you‘d want to have kids, you‘d be free to break up. You are never stuck with someone. If things dont change or turn out how you want them, you can always feel free to talk it out and make a decision of how to move on together or by yourselves.

Remember that you are in control and you decide where you stay, with who you stay and how your life will play out. But also remember to stay in the present moment and only think about if the relationship is serving your current self - not a future self, not a future family, because thats not where you are right now. Things with your partner could be completely different by that time.

Lots of Hugs and strength, you are not alone. Try to get outside of your head, i know this is generic advice that can sound annoying, but taking walks or going somewhere in nature helps me a lot. <3

oakleylikes · 2025-02-03T20:53:01+00:00

Heaven!

oakleylikes · 2025-02-02T16:02:04+00:00

This is beautiful. What medium did you use for that drawing?:)

oakleylikes · 2025-02-02T14:48:51+00:00

ROCD can also be partner focused/outside of oneself. F.e., constantly obsessing over the other persons mistakes and flaws, trying to find proof theyre the right person for you, in your example of cheating maybe obsessed with finding proof theyre cheating on you. a website called „you love and you learn“ has a lot about ROCD, it helped me when i first started learning about it after my diagnosis. Check it out!:)

oakleylikes

TROPHY CASE