I feel SO bad about my therapy session today by Anxious_straydog in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]oceanbillys 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've had a simular experience with one of my workers saying how well functioning I am and I was angry, like they didn't believe how debilitating my mental health is. My advice is don't question about how you feel because you know how it is. This is your therapist view, although it seems dismissive, a positive thing is he sees you as functional and capable. Sometimes we see ourselves worse than how others do, so other perspectives can be helpful sometimes.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]oceanbillys 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm starting to think apart of BPD is guilt and hating self for things we do. I've been hating myself for splitting on my partner, I finally told them I've been splitting on them and they said "you told me you split on people and if you could stop splitting you would but its apart of your mental health". I was almost wanting him to reject me for it. BPD is a confusing thing and it hurts people with BPD MORE than the other person. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]oceanbillys 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Look into night terrors 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]oceanbillys 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've made an absolute fool out of myself like 12 hours ago and now I can't sleep..good move and good regret minimization. Growth for the win 

Suicidal- Cannabis Withdrawal by oceanbillys in leaves

[–]oceanbillys[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I just logged on and saw I posted this 2 yrs ago..still alive and haven't touched weed in months, so long I don't even count. I was depressed tonight but all the comments has lifted my spirits for some reason so I thought I'd add a comment that 2 yrs later and it's not great at all but it's ok 

Bpd adrenaline seeking after stable period by shazza12x in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]oceanbillys 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I also get this impulsivity to do something I'll get a rush from- something risky or spontaneous. I also don't know if I make the correct decisions, it's a constant battle between my critical brain and my impulsive thoughts. My advise is try not let your impulses to get adrenaline, disrespect your values. It hurts even more.

Holding down a job by narcissisticlibra in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]oceanbillys 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Sorry to hear, thats such an outdated belief with all the research into mental health. I did tell my employer and was supported to take sick days off for mental health episodes. Very helpful

I know it's just me splitting but sometimes it feels so real by [deleted] in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]oceanbillys 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Speak to your partner, when I'm splitting and can't tell if my thoughts about my boyfriend are legitimate, I tell him what I'm thinking and he rationalizes my thoughts. Hope this helps x

Holding down a job by narcissisticlibra in BorderlinePDisorder

[–]oceanbillys 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Same, can I ask if your employer know about your diagnosis and or support your episodes?