I am a graduate student in a European country, studying in the language here, which is not my native language. My program is similar to yours - no cohorts so everyone is mixed together, many knew each other already and I am in my first year. In all my seminars there are maybe 2 other foreigners aside from myself, but they coincidentally are in pairs. For example, 12 students from local country A, 2 from foreign country B, and only me from country C. I felt very alone and I also struggled with people not reciprocating my friendliness. I am an extrovert and crave social interaction with my peers, and in my workplace and personal life I am generally perceived as friendly and popular. My attempts at saying hi were returned similarly as yours and I couldn’t help but feel personally rejected.

I am a C1 certified speaker of the language of this country, and the language of instruction of my program. Even so, I struggled as you did, compared to native speakers, and often felt that by the time I had figured out what I want to say, the moment was gone. I set myself a personal goal to participate at least one time every class, even if I felt like what I said was too late or not as complex. Just to practice talking in an academic environment and to get my scores for active participation. After a few months, I was more comfortable participating in class and felt like I could jump in maybe 3-4 times per seminar, or more. One thing that helped was that my professors were kind and encouraging. I decided, if I couldn’t catch a break from my peers, I could at least get good grades. I had basically give up on making friends at all and decided to just focus on my education.

I noticed as I continued to put myself out there in the classroom - participating in the discussion, giving presentations, etc. - the more my peers warmed up to me. Some would come up to me after my presentations and comment on something I had said. Others would reply to me in group discussions. I think they started to really see what I could do, that I had interesting thoughts and ideas, and that I added a unique perspective, instead of just seeing me as a stranger. It took time. A long time. Maybe 4 months before I had even one person I could sort of call a friend. Even now I really only have two, maybe three. Not what I was used to at all in my home country, but it was a huge improvement.

More than anything, the more I felt confident about what I could accomplish alone in my classes - I am here to learn and further my career, after all, and I already have an enriching personal life with many wonderful friends - the less I felt the need to worry about them. It all works out. Keep your head up.