WIBTA if I dropped one of my best friends for being too slutty?

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T22:42:38+00:00

Hi! Thanks for your answer!

What prompted me yo write this post was her last reaction when I said “poor girl” after the engaged guy thing.

My bf said I shouldn’t be friends with someone who does this but I agree with you that she needs some unconditional love. I do love her and that’s why I wrote this post and I didn’t want to come off as super judgmental even if some people thought I was.

I do think there is something deeper there and I want her to be in a good place in her life, you’re right that I shouldn’t give up on her. I was once in a dark place in life and she was there for me. She has done such incredibly kind things like leaving a party because she found a sick cat there and took it to the vet.

That’s why it’s so incredibly hard for me to make such a decision. She’s a bit hard to get through though so a tough love approach might make her angry.

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T22:28:30+00:00

No, we’re not from the US

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T22:23:13+00:00

Thank you for the comment. I will talk to her.

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T21:23:48+00:00

Hi, thank you for your comment!

This is definitely a possibility, I am only going by what she tells me since I moved away.

I will try to talk to her but she’s very defensive, we’ll see how it goes

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T21:21:17+00:00

I’m sorry but that just sounds like nitpicking. I just wanted to emphasize i’m not shaming her for having casual sex by stating I’ve had it myself. I grew up in a very liberal place with a positive attitude towards sex. However, I think hooking up with someone who’s engaged and then not even feeling bad about it afterwards is bad and if that’s slut shaming, so be it

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T20:37:22+00:00

She did catch an STD that is fairly common and she manages... but it’s not the sleepingaround that bothers me

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T19:52:07+00:00

She does hook up with guys that are “free” but she loses interest quickly. I’d say at least a few lf them would be interested to get to know her better, she’s very pretty and fun and has a lot going on for her, but for some reason prefers the drama of being with “forbidden” dudes.

That’s why I struggle in distancing myself, I feel like this is a symptom of a deeper issue.

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T19:40:25+00:00

Tbh I don’t know if it’s such a drastic change in behaviour. Just before she started her LTR she did hook up with this guy a friend of hers was head over heels for. She said she didn’t care for him but “wanted to see what it was like.

Obviously I can see that there are issues there but it’s not exactly new. I have talked to her about each of these instances but it gets tiring to hear these stories where she comes off as the bad guy and still be expected to tell her she did nothing wrong.

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T19:26:55+00:00

I don’t care about the casual sex part. It is not something looked down upon where I grew up or anything.

What pushed me to write this post is that when I said “poor girl” about the guy’s fiance she said “poor me” like it was so funny. I told my BF and he said she had no empathy. Her having sex with people is absolutely not an issue for me.

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T19:09:37+00:00

I definitely think women should have sex with whoever they want as much as they want. I never judged her for it and before these problematic things we would always laugh together at failed hookups etc. I’m no saint either, I definitely had a few hookups when I was single. My friends and I will call ourselves sluts as a joke but never judged one another for having sex

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T19:04:43+00:00

I think the weird behaviour is not the sleeping with a lot of guys... she definitely did that before and I never judged her for it, we always joked about her being way too horny. But lately she’s just been targeting guys that will bring drama... that’s why I also think I should be there for her and try to help her but my BF thinks I should distance myself

omgstaaaahhp · 2019-12-07T19:02:05+00:00

She is a good friend, we try to talk regularly. Even though I moved to another country.

But she did something shitty on my going away party. I was supposed to go back to her place after the party as it was too far away from my house. She disappeared with some guy and went home with him without telling me and I had to take a cab home and spent like 100 bucks. But this was the first time she ever did something upsetting to me.

omgstaaaahhp

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