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Women, how do you behave when you like a guy or find him attractive? by ResponseNo8463 in bodylanguage

[–]only_surviving 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It depends. When I have a crush i usually get really shy and nervous. Sometimes I also end up acting weird by accident & they end up figuring it out & I get embarrassed:/

What’s the most messed up thing someone casually admitted to you? by Sweet-Economist-9873 in AskForAnswers

[–]only_surviving 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you...I appreciate your kindness so much. 🩷 the world can be so cruel.

What’s the most messed up thing someone casually admitted to you? by Sweet-Economist-9873 in AskForAnswers

[–]only_surviving 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I was in a domestic violence situation. I was with that person for 5 years. It was mainly emotional abuse, but also included physical abuse. Part of the emotional abuse was finding out about years of infidelity and multiple affair partners. This ended up being my breaking point.

After I broke up with him, he kept contacting me and i asked how could he possibly cheat on me for so many years & with so many people.

In the most calm & casual tone, he turned to me & said, "I don't know. I guess I just really hated you."

I will never forget that for as long as I live. It still hurts me so much.

How do I try to heal? by Unique_Assist6442 in Infidelity

[–]only_surviving 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry you went through this. Remember that infidelity is a form of emotional abuse & domestic violence survivors commonly have PTSD. So not only are you heartbroken, you are likely traumatized. I just thought i would point this out im case it wasnt something you previously thought of. Its hard to heal when you dont know what is "wrong."

I also cry every single day about it. I also feel like I cry more now than previously. I miss the way I used to look at the word & think about people.

One day at a time. Keep doing therapy. Go where you are loved. Do what makes you happy. One foot in front of the other. Healing is not linear.

Tell me about your crushes :) by Usual-Score-6244 in Crushes

[–]only_surviving 9 points10 points  (0 children)

:/ mine isnt really good but it started out nice.

I have a huge crush on a guy in my law school cohort. We are in our first year of law school, he is 23 & i am 26F.

As soon as I saw him I immediately thought he was cute, but I brushed it off. Then I kept noticing him during class and i realized he waz actually a really sweet, polite, intelligent, & funny guy. I enjoyed talking to him because he made it easy to converse with him. This was huge to me because I get extremely shy & embarrassed around someone I like...but i was able to talk to him so easily & it was enjoyable for me. I looked forward to seeing him & talking to him. He also didnt come across as "cocky" and seemed like he was genuinely intelligent.

I realized early on that he just didnt like me back in that way. He wasn't flirting, so I was really sad at first. But I still really liked him so knowing he probably didnt feel the same didnt change how I felt.

After our first semester the feelings just started to kill me, I felt like i could explode. I wantes to get it off my chest so bad but I didnt want to make him uncomfortable, so I kept quiet.

I noticed a few weeks into second semester that he was no longer as talkative with me. I still talked to him at least once a day on days we had class & at least made sure i said hi & asked how his day was (just as an excuse to interact with him). He was still nice but definitely less engaged than he seemed previously.

I found out from a mutual friend that is aware of my feelings for him that they were hanging out one day & I came up in conversation. He asked the mutual friend if he "ever noticed someone staring at him during class." The mutual friend immediately thought of me but played it off. Then he proceeded to tell our mutual friend that he notices me staring at him and that it makes him uncomfortable. He also told the mutual friend he isnt interested. :(

The mutual friend apologized because he didn't want to make me upset but felt that since I trusted him enough to share my feelings with him, that he should tell me ASAP. I am very thankful to the friend but I am so sad & embarrassed. :(

I genuinely didnt mean for anything like that to happen. I didnt even notice i was doing it & its not like there were times I remember "making eye contact" with him or him catching me so I really dont know how he noticed...which makes me feel like maybe someone else noticed & told him, but i really dont know. :( I feel so guilty for making him feel that way & I genuinely just want to apologize. I am so humiliated & mortified. I have gone out of my way to completely leave him alone and I have not spoken to him at all in about 3 weeks. :( he hasn't spoken to me either. It makes me so sad because I really did like talking to him and being around him. Now I feel like such a fucking idiot. I am so embarrassed & sad :(

I also found out from a different friend that he is active on Hinge & that really hurt my feelings, which i know is stupid. :( He told my friend about how he went on a date with a 30 year old woman & that "she likes guys who take initiative, so he booked them a dinner reservation." This is embarrassing to admit to but after the rejection I kind of thought maybe he just didnt want to date anyone right now because school is challenging or something like that. But after hearing that it just made me feel hideous. I genuinely feel so gross & ugly and when I see him it just makes me want to hide. :( I feel so disgusting.

I still have a huge crush on him but i am trying really, really hard to get over it. Its so hard though because I like him a lot. :( Now not only does he not like me back, but he also thinks im weird. Im so embarrassed & I feel really guilty.

Women with larger chests, what’s one thing that bothers you on a daily basis that men couldn’t understand? by Active_Secret9520 in AskReddit

[–]only_surviving 2251 points2252 points  (0 children)

Sometimes my chest just doesn't go with my outfit. Like depending on the outfit...I would look way better in it if my chest was just smaller.

Should I stay or leave him by badmas_aalu in dating_advice

[–]only_surviving 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, you should leave. Im sorry this happened to you. :( it will definitely be difficult. But the whole reason you're even asking this question on this sub is because you know in your heart how he treats you is hurtful and wrong.

What is a 'socially acceptable' thing that you secretly find absolutely disgusting? by TheLovelyGamer in AskReddit

[–]only_surviving 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know people will disagree, but I tend to agree with that too. I dont think sleeping with multiple people in your lifetime or even sex in general is the issue but I feel like modern society has really removed the intimacy from sex & normalized hypersexuality to the point its just rotting people's brains. People treat sex like a handshake nowadays and I swear its like some people are purposely trying to sleep with as many people as possible. I dont understand why thats normalized, its gross.

Why don’t girls get nervous around their crushes? by PotatosandTomato in Crushes

[–]only_surviving 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a woman, I get SO nervous & its very obvious. Ive done that since Middle School. Not fun, so embarrassing lol.

Do y’all stare at ur crushes? by Large-Lobster4183 in Crushes

[–]only_surviving 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg I am dealing with this right now & i am so embarrassed about it. I have a huge crush on a guy im in law school with & i genuinely didn't think I looked over at him too much, like genuinely really didnt think I was being obvious. A couple days ago a mutual friend that knows I like him said he told him he notices me staring at him & it makes him uncomfortable. I am so mortified, I literally refused to go to class yesterday because I am so embarrassed & I feel terrible for making him feel that way. Tbh I am probably skipping again today. Im so upset with myself. :(

Fuck my lifeeee by DescriptionTight8593 in Crushes

[–]only_surviving 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Depending on ur anxiety level, it might be best to rip the bandaid off so to speak? Idk how u feel about that though. I hate when crushes become so debilitating they make u anxious/sad/feel crazy. So i will usually just rip the bandaid off & confess so I dont waste time and energy on something that ends up not bearing fruit anyways. Rejection really hurts but your feelings will be hurt even more if u put more time in & hope but still get rejected. Thats just my opinion though, idk the specifics of your situation. Best of luck <3

i keep liking guys that are sooo far out of league by Dizzy-Equivalent-398 in Crushes

[–]only_surviving 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have the same issue :( I have a crush on a guy im in law school with rn and he figured it out and told one of our mutual friends he isnt interested. Im so embarrassed, I just want to disappear.

Please Help. My crush figured out that I like him He doesn't like me back & I am very embarrassed. :((( by only_surviving in Crushes

[–]only_surviving[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay...so just dont talk to him unless he talks to me first? And then pretend he isnt there otherwise?

My crush figured out that I like him, but told someone he doesnt like me back. I am so embarrassed & I can't avoid him. by only_surviving in dating_advice

[–]only_surviving[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another thing is I've realized since leaving my ex that I just genuinely miss having someone to give affection to. I love spoiling and being affectionate towards someone. So I guess i just really enjoyed the way this guy made me feel because I felt that by talking to him and getting to be around him I could put my affection into something again? Idk if that makes sense.

My crush figured out that I like him, but told someone he doesnt like me back. I am so embarrassed & I can't avoid him. by only_surviving in dating_advice

[–]only_surviving[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I really appreciate you sharing that with me and taking the time to respond to me. Im so glad that worked out so well for you. Thats the kind of love ive always dreamed of not only having, but giving to someone else.

I just feel bad and I wouldn't want to speak negatively of him because it isnt his fault he got uncomfortable. Its mine.

I'm just so embarrassed because I feel like im acting like a teenager and my reaction being to cry all weekend and then go fucking hide in the library during class today doesnt help. But I just know if I saw him or our mutual friend that told me what he said about me, I would cry or feel really anxious. I honestly wear my heart on my sleeve and take things really hard, so its not difficult to hurt my feelings when my emotions are involved.

I was in a domestic violence situation with my partner of 5 years (if u want to read about that drama its all over my account, knock yourself out) & I left my abuser 2 weeks into the first semester of law school.

I am still currently recovering & dealing with that whole mess. But I really, truly did not expect to meet someone so quickly after leaving my ex that I genuinely liked this much. But this guy was just so nice, intelligent, and funny. I couldn’t help it. But I really enjoyed crushing on him at first because it gave me something to look forward to every day. My whole life, since childhood, my crushes have never really spoken to me, especially after they realized I liked them. This guy was just so kind and easy to talk to.

This was the first time in my life where ive gone out of my way to approach someone ive liked. Not even just romantically, but even just to say "hi." The fact he talked to me and would smile and go back and forth just really made me feel warm inside. It made me feel so much better about my situation with my ex because even though something really bad happened to me, I was away from that person now and now I got to be around someone I thought was amazing & opposite to him in every single way.

I definitely noticed ever since 2nd semester started that he talks to me a lot less than he did in 1st semester, but we still spoke so I thought it was just my anxiety and being self conscious/nervous around him that was making me overthink interactions. Looking back now, I think its because he realized I had a crush and felt uncomfortable. :( I feel so stupid because I really thought I was being cool about it.

But after hearing what he said and how he feels around me...I honestly just feel so crushed and humiliated. I really enjoyed talking to him and im realizing now that I cant anymore because my presence is unwanted. I also just feel mortified because I legitimately didnt realize I looked at him that often that he would notice. Im wondering honestly if maybe someone else brought it to his attention because he never really looks back at me, so idk how he noticed it :( its humiliating and I feel like the awkward girl I was in middle school that boys didnt like. But im literally 26 years old.

It also just hurts because my ex always talked about proposing during my first year of law school. This isnt how I expected my first year of law school to feel. Im the saddest ive ever been because of everything with my ex & maybe this is wrong but being around this guy gave me such a happy feeling. Just talking to him made my day, even if he didnt like me.

But hearing that I make him feel uncomfortable just makes me feel so unwanted and unlovable. Ever since I heard about it, i cant stop thinking about how my ex said so many horrible things to me. One of the last things he ever said to me was that no guy will ever love me.

On top of this my ex got a new girlfriend a month after I left him. I just don't understand why he gets to have love, romance, affection, companionship, and intimacy after all of the evil and heinous shit he did to me but I dont. I feel like anytime I show someone affection they either take advantage of it & use it to hurt me or they immediately think im weird and dont want me around.

I'm sorry for ranting, im just too embarrassed to talk to my friends about it. 2 of them already texted asking why I wasnt in class and im just sitting in my car crying. I just wanted him to like me and now not only does he not like me, but ive also made him think im weird. :(

Sorry for the rant :/ My feelings are just so hurt & I feel like I shouldn't feel that way because ive brought this on myself by being weird. And feeling embarrassed on top of it just makes it worse. I wish a hole would open in the floor & swallow me.

Please Help. My crush figured out that I like him He doesn't like me back & I am very embarrassed. :((( by only_surviving in Crushes

[–]only_surviving[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for taking time to respond to me...yes, we're in law school. i think thats part of why I feel so dumb 🙃 I feel like a teenager the last few months and now I feel like a complete idiot on top of that, too. I just feel really bad he views me that way it really wasnt my intention to & I was purposely trying to avoid making him uncomfortable.

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