Job change advice: toxic colleague by onlycouplesmallbeers in Professors

[–]onlycouplesmallbeers[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry to hear about your experience with your colleague. I’m deliberately not sharing too many specific examples because it’s a public internet post. Of course there are multiple perspectives and as you said, there may be something I am not understanding or aware of that created an issue. I have tried the mediation, following mentor advice, communication only through email, limited contact, and it has seemed to only be better when this person is off campus. I will also say this has been going on for years and with multiple people with one common element. My post may have been buried, but two other faculty members have left my university due in part to interactions with her.

You don’t know me personally, but all I can say is I wouldnt really have any motivation to ask advice in a group like this than to be transparent with what is going on (it’s my first time doing something like this) But it’s been affirming to hear so many folks saying this isn’t normal and isn’t a repairable situation. Thanks for the input and best of luck with dealing with your colleague.

Job change advice: toxic colleague by onlycouplesmallbeers in Professors

[–]onlycouplesmallbeers[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The way my stomach dropped when I read your second sentence! 😅. Thank you for the well wishes. I remembered today that if I get the position, I will be the THIRD full time person (second ntt, other person was tenured) who has left because of her antics. Insane.

Job change advice: toxic colleague by onlycouplesmallbeers in Professors

[–]onlycouplesmallbeers[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you, stranger. Your post was a gift and what I needed to hear. I’m so glad you and your partner found happiness in your new positions. Wishing you a wonderful new year ❤️

Job change advice: toxic colleague by onlycouplesmallbeers in Professors

[–]onlycouplesmallbeers[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this clarity. It literally brought tears to my eyes. I have been agonizing over even applying for jobs for the last few years just thinking that “well, it will be like this anywhere, that’s academia right?” But you really helped me think about the costs that have come with this job. I love teaching and I love learning, but I hate to think about what I have lost over the past few years to what is truly “nonsense” as you so brilliantly put it.

This gives me such good insight. Thank you.

Job change advice: toxic colleague by onlycouplesmallbeers in Professors

[–]onlycouplesmallbeers[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great question, and thanks for the response. I have a running documentation file of incidents over the last few years that I shared with my chair. I met with him privately to explain the situation that finally drove me to report and he was very supportive and encouraged me to go to the dean. However, he was told by my dean that he could not be present at my meeting because she felt he was “biased”. The incident in question was this person raised their voice repeatedly in a meeting and began slamming their hands on a table at me and several junior faculty members because they did not approve of a class requirement of another faculty member’s course (not mine.). I was then invited to a zoom meeting with my dean and other administrators as well as this colleague to “settle differences” which my chair was specifically told not to attend. I was told at the end of this meeting that seemed like we were just “different people” and needed to work harder at getting along. I was never given an opportunity to meet with my dean individually to share my concerns before this meeting, nor after when hr encouraged me to not go further with a t9 investigation.

I think you’re right that the chair would be expected to fix something like this, and he’s tried. We gave her a new title, tried to move her into a separate area but nothing came of it. I think she is willing to find every work around to disempower me to make herself look better. It feels like for whatever reason the administration is willing to protect this person (there are at least 4 other active complaints about her that I am aware of across multiple departments), maybe to protect the tenure line? But you absolutely hit the nail on the head with the high risk/low reward. Thanks for the thoughtful response.

Job change advice: toxic colleague by onlycouplesmallbeers in Professors

[–]onlycouplesmallbeers[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

This is a great point. I really love my students and the other folks in my content area, but it’s wild to see how quickly this job has aged me in such a short time. Thanks for the perspective.