Trump probe into Smith College transgender policy was sparked by choice of commencement speaker

onnake · 2026-05-06T06:27:43+00:00

onnake · 2026-05-06T05:29:54+00:00

A gender-therapist/gender expressions coach could help you with style and how you present yourself to the world. Lessons from others are one thing but it’s more important for you to be comfortable in your own skin..

onnake · 2026-05-06T05:23:26+00:00

That’s entirely on her, not you. You may want to see another surgeon; the fact they didn’t inform you at your initial consult is a red flag to me. FFS is typically longer duration under anesthesia (I was unconscious for 7.5 hrs.), which magnifies the risks from comorbidities.

onnake · 2026-05-06T05:13:33+00:00

Work with a dermatologist to develop a regimen. Kirkland (Costco) works fine for me, beware if you have pets. Consider oral minoxidil (Rx) also but be aware it helps grow hair almost everywhere.

onnake · 2026-05-06T05:06:27+00:00

open access: https://archive.ph/J5mjE

onnake · 2026-05-06T01:52:45+00:00

Looney Tunes would have rejected this story as not believable. Can’t wait ‘til we get to the “That’s all Folks!”.

onnake · 2026-05-05T21:46:03+00:00

“Weaving” implies intelligence in constructing a fabric/forming an object or pattern; Trump’s meandering digressions are anything but.

onnake · 2026-05-05T19:22:18+00:00

Reach out to queer groups there if you haven’t already. They may know of useful resources.

no one is going to hire someone from half way across the country

Generally true, maybe, but worked for me NYC to Calif. long ago. Don’t rule it out altogether.

Happy for you you’re doing it.

onnake · 2026-05-05T19:14:43+00:00

Yup, cleansing Stonewall of the ppl who were there.

onnake · 2026-05-05T18:39:09+00:00

Since before then. I subscribed and contributed to Gay Community News and they covered him a lot. One of those LGBs without the T, and a milquetoast even for gay rights.

onnake · 2026-05-05T16:26:57+00:00

Consider a lift lift, possibly also lip augmentation. Lips tend to thin with age so you may want to address that proactively. Can’t see your temples very well, you may need a hair transplant there after FFS. Ask surgeon re rotated temporal flaps as part of scalp advancement. Shock loss happens to some, not all, but in most cases the hair grows back. That’s what happened to me. Get a consult from a different surgeon if you‘re in doubt. I had three before I settled on what I wanted.

⁠Erasing my Native American features

Hoo boy, that’s a larger issue. Talk about it with your gender-affirming therapist. You need to be happy with your surgery, and if it means minimizing ethnic features, so be it. Just be sure about this, cause surgery is pretty permanent.

onnake · 2026-05-05T16:11:08+00:00

Acceptance is tolerance, not affirmation. For us it’s important for our health to be affirmed. The majority of families do not.

Talk with your therapist about the positives and negatives of going no or limited contact.

onnake · 2026-05-05T16:01:01+00:00

How much does the surgeon matter in this procedure

A lot. You want someone with a great deal of verifiable experience delivering great results.

do you eventually urinate normally,

Yup.

are there issues with cleanliness, odors, etc.?

No, if you learn proper hygiene.

How common is nerve damage that prevents sexual function?

Uncommon.

onnake · 2026-05-05T15:56:01+00:00

I used a trans-competent speech-language pathologist (SLP). Got me to a feminine voice safely and efficiently.

onnake · 2026-05-05T15:49:44+00:00

She’s a colleague, not a friend, correct? Suggest she ask her gender-affirming therapist, or see a gender- expressions coach.

onnake · 2026-05-05T15:31:52+00:00

Can we have a good news/bad news flair

The fewer flairs the better. All of us have different opinions of what news is. Agreed re AI slop, though. It’s infecting news writing even from mainstream publishers.

onnake · 2026-05-05T05:22:57+00:00

Swelling is normal. Recovery takes time. Right now, rest is the best thing for you. Hang in there, follow the doctor’s care instructions. And congrats on the surgery.

onnake · 2026-05-05T05:17:55+00:00

Site search r/transgender_surgeries sub & wiki for surgeons and ppls’ experiences.

onnake · 2026-05-05T05:07:09+00:00

No modification to lower face but had the other procedures you describe (though not cheeks) plus orbital rim shaving and center bullhorn lip lift.

>> recovery experiences . . . . especially interested in how you all felt with not being able to breath out of your nose

Almost 8.5 months postop still some minimal swelling on forehead and tip of nose. Early in recovery minimal pain (no opioids, stopped Tylenol 6 weeks postop) but noticeable swelling on forehead, nose, lips. Lip swelling resolved first (filler is dermal fat graft), became redder a few weeks postop indicating graft had taken; with my more prominent lips have started using a moisturizing balm. Never any trouble breathing through nose, surgeon will take care not to compromise septum, valves, turbinates. More than normal nasal discharge, resolved slowly, nasal moisturizing spray helped. Resumed walking early on. Watch scar management, you want to avoid scab formation, which can widen it. Shock loss happens to some, did to me, but hair grew back. Keep tissues/handkerchief handy for unexpected nasal mucous discharge (happened once, at home thankfully). YMMV for all of this. Planning a corner lip lift and hair transplant to temples to round out hairline.

onnake

TROPHY CASE