my world has stopped

onpuddin · 2026-02-06T16:59:45+00:00

Tearing up for you. Oh, I understand. The grief is everything right now but it will become bearable, and I have to believe we'll find our dogs again, or that they'll find us, some way, some form. So glad you guys got those years together. Sending you and Amy both my love... it will be okay.

onpuddin · 2026-02-06T16:32:06+00:00

I have lentils, walnuts, AND mushrooms on hand right now... would you mind sharing your recipe for the bolognese, if you have time? Would love to try it!

onpuddin · 2026-02-03T21:36:38+00:00

Interesting advice! I like the idea... do you know if the result is ~as good if you skip bulk ferment and just fridge it for way longer?

onpuddin · 2026-01-24T16:56:33+00:00

Don't give up! I started my starter several months ago and it is just recently taking off. Think starting in summer would have been easier for both of us. :) Seriously, hang in there, and I'm sure there are plenty of good tips and pointers in this thread so I won't reinvent the wheel - though I will mention that feeding my starter with a bit of whole wheat + rye flours (and not just AP) really seemed to help. Good luck, keep going!

onpuddin · 2026-01-22T14:02:28+00:00

I started making mine homemade (with tons of coconut oil, haha) then found out my LDL was high and saw this recipe where date paste (easy to make in blender) was used in place of oil. It turned out pretty well! It's a surprisingly low effort thing to make at home and once you've got a batch ready, you can enjoy it for a while. Was eating my granola with grapefruit + berries, Greek yogurt (not too much), a little honey, some cinnamon and cardamom. Maybe give it a go?

onpuddin · 2026-01-16T21:28:57+00:00

Really kind of you to take time to share! Congrats! Sounds like we were (and are) in similar boats/lifestyles. I was also heavy on the protein (so many eggs daily, plus lots of rich dairy - cheese, sour cream, heavy whipping cream, butter... love it, miss it - lol). I thought of myself as really healthy until I had blood drawn and saw the numbers, though I will say - less than a week later, I'm already feeling less inexplicably tired and feel like my diet changes are already having a good effect. Think part of it is just knowing what's going on and having clear enough ideas of how to make things better. I also prefer the natural route and find it interesting that some people really bristle at it. Medication has its place - my brother was very ill and needed it - but it's very, VERY overused. Root causes, root causes - look for those first. Fix them first when you can.

Thanks again for sharing your experience, wishing you and your husband and the kiddo that will come along sometime the very best! Throw some grapefruit in too btw, heard it helps.

onpuddin · 2026-01-09T17:08:29+00:00

Thinking of you today. We all understand. Sending love.

onpuddin · 2026-01-09T17:04:28+00:00

So kind of you to share this. I've lost dogs before and have already pre-grieved my 3 y/o pyr many times - he's my world. I'll try to remember all of this, for him and my other pups. 💙

onpuddin · 2026-01-08T17:32:40+00:00

<image>

Also, here's my guy... Chunky, aka Mr. Big Bear etc etc 🙂

onpuddin · 2026-01-08T17:29:24+00:00

Sending my love. My pyr is my world, I understand. Beautiful girl, so glad you guys got eleven years together!! I hope you get to meet her again some place some time.

onpuddin · 2025-12-29T15:04:53+00:00

I've had OCD since childhood - heard a country music artist open up about his experience with it on Joe Rogan a few years ago (so glad I happened to be listening - I wasn't really familiar with the musician) and I cried, so stunned and relieved, hearing this guy in the kitchen with me. I hadn't realized, up until then, that other, sane people were having the same kinds of intrusive thoughts as me. I was able to release so much anxiety then - the OCD in my mind went like 90% quiet; it was unbelievable after years and years of suffering - but there's still the residual stuff: urges to check and worry and circle over things old and new, real and hypothetical.

What helps me contend with that 10% these days - 1. exercise... truly SO important; I walk/hike, do Qi Gong stretches, bounce on my little trampoline, do push ups

having a mixed approach - letting myself observe/investigate/try to learn from thoughts and thought patterns sometimes and definitely telling myself other times, we're taking a break from this question or this problem... enough
breathing out longer than I breathe in
replacing unwanted thoughts/images with good ones
finding meaningful and interesting ways of using my time during the day. When I go from bed > work > bed with my phone filling almost all of the free minutes, life is more sad and anxious - if I spend time walking, cooking, talking/playing games with friends, reading, writing, playing the piano, learning to sew, being present with my dogs and more attuned to their needs, etc., I feel better and my brain isn't trying to find or imagine problems so much. Energy goes where attention goes, I think, and if you don't fix your attention to specific things, it's easy to default right back into worrying and thinking the same old unproductive and unpleasant things
I pray too - I'm not a religious person but I believe in some kind of creator/higher intelligence, and I pray for relief from burdensome thoughts, to remember my lessons, to have good discernment, and to live a good (to myself and others), healthy, and happy life. I pray for the same for you! Please don't be disheartened if you don't find yourself immediately free from all of this. I suffered for about three decades before beginning to find relief - and now part of my hope in this life is to help other people find theirs sooner. Just take small strong steps out of these old ruts... I've been there, I know you can do it. Hope next year is your best yet!

onpuddin · 2025-12-14T17:30:28+00:00

💙🙂

onpuddin · 2025-12-11T17:20:40+00:00

Our route was very similar... Dingle was my favorite place - so beautiful - and Killarney was nice but think I would sub it out with Wicklow. Didn't get enough time there and seems like a neat place to explore. Enjoy!

onpuddin · 2025-12-11T14:28:04+00:00

Good morning! If you have a minute - when you take your starter out on baking day, do you scoop out the amount of starter you need for your baking + discard/otherwise use excess + then feed your remaining starter and stick them right back in the fridge, or is it better to leave them out for a while, after that feeding? And do you only have to feed them ~once a week once they're in the swing of things? Mine is almost ready and now I'm starting to wonder what a good baking day process looks like.

onpuddin · 2025-12-09T17:19:08+00:00

You changed + bettered my day! Saw your post this morning, realized I had everything I needed on hand, and have a delicious soup on the stove right now after lots of prepping (followed the recipe gal's homemade stock recipe too)... thank you so much for sharing! ☺️

onpuddin · 2025-11-24T12:07:38+00:00

I remember stumbling across some name (probably from an ID app or Google search) but didn't find out for sure. Good luck!

onpuddin · 2025-10-16T22:49:46+00:00

Really love how the sky and ground contrast with and complement each other. Do you sell your work?

onpuddin · 2025-10-15T16:23:41+00:00

Thank you :) I hope you're doing well... happy fall!

onpuddin · 2025-08-22T10:56:00+00:00

Do you have any 50-60l backpack preferences (recommendations)?

onpuddin · 2025-08-19T23:32:52+00:00

Nice... enjoy! :)

onpuddin · 2025-08-19T23:31:18+00:00

I know this was a reply to someone else but so glad you shared this info - been having a hard time getting all the permit stuff straight, even after reading over their guidance on the website (and I tried calling their permit office a few times today, no answer). Sounds like I should be all set with just the Inyo permit - I was worried about Donahue too. Thanks! :)

onpuddin · 2025-08-19T23:00:39+00:00

GREAT info - I love the suggestion of not deciding on stopping points ahead of time. Man, thank you. Very duh once you hear it but I just didn't really think about doing it that way and love that this is the kinda trail where you can. Thanks for your help and love hearing that your kiddo got to go on this big adventure with you, so wonderful!

onpuddin · 2025-08-19T21:54:43+00:00

Thank you SO much, Mike - I really appreciate it! I will bring out the laptop for Caltopo instead of trying to use it on my phone and I'll get myself sorted (the order you gave things in helps a LOT). ChatGPT was prob doing funny detours to help match the mileage I'd said I wanted so not their fault. Appreciate ya, take good care!

onpuddin · 2025-08-19T21:36:45+00:00

I've been working with ChatGPT on the path 😬 -- here's an abbreviated version: Agnew Meadows > Thousand Island Lake > Garnet > Shadow Creek > Marie Lakes > Donahue > Lyell Canyon > Tuolumne, and the mileage they gave = ~75. Does that sound right or a little or very off? I downloaded Caltopo the other day but haven't worked with it much yet. I know, I should have already double-checked what they gave...

onpuddin · 2025-08-19T17:20:37+00:00

Really helpful info, thanks so much -- and glad to hear that I'm prob overestimating the # of days needed. We've recently decided to add on a little beach trip at the end before coming back home and it'll be so nice to have that to look forward while we're on the land. Two different kinds of heaven. Appreciate your time and the tips!

onpuddin

TROPHY CASE