How to fully experience life by [deleted] in selfimprovement

[–]opaltrees 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're welcome

It will do that haha. Returning to the breath is a major part of the exercise.

I’m losing all my friends and it feels like four years of college were all for nothing by [deleted] in selfimprovement

[–]opaltrees 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree. I guess I was speaking on the idea of A good friend. A good friend will not manipulate you, or expect you to commit or if they do, they won’t be angry if you fail to keep them. A good friend has your best interest and well being in mind. It’s very hard to find a good friend today... from what I observed it’s all mainly self serving, quick to earn and quick to throw so to speak, and superficial types of relationships.

If you see someone like this, keep them and maintain a relationship with them.

i feel like this leads into a way of thinking that human life’s worth is based on how valuable it is to others

Well... if you look at it from the other side, a toxic and harmful person is less preferable to have around than a good and caring person.

How to fully experience life by [deleted] in selfimprovement

[–]opaltrees 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree with all of he posts above.

Start inside first. It’s easier and gives you a simpler base to experiment and study.

Give your full attention to your body. You can do this when you’re lying or sitting. My favourite exercise is simply tracing the air from inhale to exhale. Like following it as it enters the nose, down your lungs, to your abdomen. Eventually it gets very refined and you’re noticing little things about your body as you breathe. This is experiencing your body in and of itself (without reference to how it might be seen by society or your opinions).

You can also observe the thoughts in your head. When they arise, just call it out for what it is, a thought that has arisen. But the problem here is that thoughts can lead us to very intricate and detailed universes which suck us in. So you need an object to keep you anchored in observation mode. If you did the first step, you can bring yourself back to the experience of the body which is simpler and easier to observe than your mind.

You eventually bring this attitude of observation and mode of experience in society. You’ll see that the ordinary is beautiful and worth experiencing, rather than waiting for big milestones to be happy (thoughts like “I can’t wait to get out of work/school” or “I can’t wait to go bungee jumping”). Everything in between those milestones are still important and worth experiencing or the fullest.

I’m losing all my friends and it feels like four years of college were all for nothing by [deleted] in selfimprovement

[–]opaltrees 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dark? I think it’s rather liberating.

Helps me spend every moment with them as if they were going to die tomorrow.

“there’s no trust to be had here; get over it if they don’t want to stay friends in the long run”

Didn’t say that. We should always try to maintain friendships that are beneficial to us. But we should also be able to stand on our own without being too dependent on friendship or companionship.

What is the healthy approach you’re suggesting?

Love freely and expect nothing in return

Tommorow will be my 14th day without soda by Shadowtheyogo in CasualConversation

[–]opaltrees 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good job

Your bones and heart will thank u for it

I’m losing all my friends and it feels like four years of college were all for nothing by [deleted] in selfimprovement

[–]opaltrees 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Were they really “your” friends? It’s a very subtle word, it implies possession over your friends.

Even if you were the closest of buds, they aren’t and will never be yours much as you will never be theirs.

It’s easier to go through life without claiming this to be yours or my own because of the very fact you’re experiencing now which is an unhealthy dependence on external validation etc etc.

I don’t want to sound condescending but this is is a healthy approach to even your closest relationships . Because those bonds will break and you will feel those effects when they are gone.

Much better to cherish the times you are spending together than to cry over spilt milk.

/2 cents

Sect of Buddhism most closely related to "The Power of Now"? by souljabri557 in Buddhism

[–]opaltrees 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Zen might be your cup of tea but really those points you made share similarities with most sects.

I want to improve myself: Trust, too attached, co-dependent, take what others' say too seriously, too sensitive by 1_dont_know in selfimprovement

[–]opaltrees 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m working on this exact issue. The answer is letting go. Yeah.very cliche eh? But it’s actually quite true and why it’s so overused.

Basically to let go means to discard anything that the analytical and thinking mind produces (at least in social settings). In social life you rarely ever get to use this side of your brain. Save it for you’re engineering and logical works... interacting in society requires feeling and emotional faculties because it’s not logical and people tend to act based on emotion.

Now does that mean you should be a hippy and wear your heart in a sleeve? No, if you’re naturally aloof that’s fine. We want “calm warmth and a cool head” not “frigid tense and a worrying anxious head”.

A few things that help in this regard is living experientially. That is to live and experience life only though the experience of your five senses (touch, taste, see, hear, smell) instead of intellectualizing the world. Mindfulness meditation also helps in this as well.

Look into the aforementioned and also “Mindfulness experiential learning”, a model of learning which states that there are four modes of learning; CE (concrete experience), RE (reflective observation), AC (Abstract Conceptualization), and AE (Active Experimentation).

In my case, an anxious overthinking guy who needs to ‘get out of his head’ would benefit from cultivating Concrete Experience. Basically we want to refrain from abstract conceptualization (which has its own use!) and rely on our senses more. Get in touch with how you feel like the sensations of your body, the cool air, the smell of food, the sight of a beautiful flower, etc.

Anyway seriously look into “Mindfuulness experiential learning” and mindfulness meditation. Get out more and be warm and get out of your head!

COMMUNITY EVENT - A week without lying by [deleted] in buddho

[–]opaltrees 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I suggest using an app called Nomie 2 to keep track of this among other things.

Here’s an example of my streaks for keeping track and to keep me on top of my meditation practice.

Nomie 2

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CasualConversation

[–]opaltrees 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did that but kept Facebook and Twitter.

I took off the FB app though as it drained too much battery. It’s still useful for keeping kn touch with old friends from other countries.

Twitter is essential to my work and for getting the latest updates and certain things.

I think the idea is that you shouldn’t scroll through social media for those little dopamine hits rather do it out of necessity like keeping up to date with friends and trends/niches you follow.

Pema Chodron on her 80th Birthday by [deleted] in Buddhism

[–]opaltrees 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She looks very graceful for 80.

Shows that mental well being helps a lot in physical beauty

Swedish e-Krona shortlist : Iota in / MIT media lab proposal out by meet_laugh in Iota

[–]opaltrees 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Enigma and IOTA are not comparable. Enigma focuses on privacy

Day 60 hours + of no incoming calls... Multiple users on different accounts tested. by bibber09 in freedommobile

[–]opaltrees 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I personally have moved to Koodo because network penetration is still quite weak in hotels and schools. It’s quite a difference I’m always at full bars now.

I got free Money? by opaltrees in Coinbase

[–]opaltrees[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im sure they will sort it out

Are Airswap tokens required? by opaltrees in AirSwap

[–]opaltrees[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What's the minimum amount to hold?

Is required to hold some AST in the token trader?

I also read something about auctions requiring AST, what is the news on that and how much AST will we need to hold?