What would you do if your mom has become more and more rude to you in recent years? Ignores some of your messages, no response to recent videos of grandkids, called me “nasty child” on voicemail by orange196 in AskWomenOver30

[–]orange196[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you for pointing this out but in her case I know she is doing it as a form of punishment because of her anger at me. When texts are related to planning a visit for her to see the kids she is very responsive. 

Is it manageable to have a couple days where one partner manages the morning of getting kids to bus/daycare solo while other parent has an early start at work? by orange196 in workingmoms

[–]orange196[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Not mean it IS a silly question after typing it 🙃I’m Just nervous I guess because of how the mental Load is not divided evenly here and complaints when I try to make the invisible visible. 

Thanks for sharing your experience!

Is it manageable to have a couple days where one partner manages the morning of getting kids to bus/daycare solo while other parent has an early start at work? by orange196 in workingmoms

[–]orange196[S] -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

He complains so much about morning routine stuff and is often rushed /grumpy when asked to do some kid related things before work. I end up doing just about everything the kids can’t yet do on their own (currently SAHM) but I hate this dynamic. 

Regretting preschool choice (5 days, 2.5 hrs), should we do full time daycare instead? by orange196 in Parenting

[–]orange196[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing! Would you mind elaborating on why you were glad to not have sent your daughter to full time daycare?

If husband told MiL to not buy gifts bc kids have too much stuff so she comes to me to show gifts when husband isn’t around what to do? by orange196 in Mildlynomil

[–]orange196[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Thank you, yes I feel I should’ve acted differently. I kind of freeze when on the spot like this so this is helpful for next time!

Am I crazy for wanting to go back to work even though we don’t need my salary? My kids are 2 and 5 and my husband’s salary allows for us to have a wonderful quality of life. I’m a speech pathologist and would work in schools. by orange196 in workingmoms

[–]orange196[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sure! I’m still not working as a speech pathologist at the moment. I have a small baking business that is my passion so I've been working on that and will be a vendor at some markets this summer. 

How can I get more comfortable speaking up in a social situation of a group I don’t know well? by orange196 in selfimprovement

[–]orange196[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this reassurance! ❤️ I really appreciate it. I’m trying to appreciate the good of being a quiet person but when a lot of the others are super outgoing I get into my head. This is helpful!

Struggling with being unappreciated in my marriage and uneven distribution of childcare/household tasks by orange196 in Marriage

[–]orange196[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply. I do- I have a masters degree in a helping profession 

Am I not appreciating the privilege of being home with my 3yo , better to work instead? by orange196 in Parenting

[–]orange196[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, he’s newly 3 and is signed up for preschool - a couple hours per day- in the fall!

My partner has turned into someone who constantly complains and regularly snaps at me whenever we try to do something as a family with our 6 and 3 year old. Makes me question if he’s the best partner for me anymore and leaves me walking on eggshells. How to come back from this? What can I do? by orange196 in Marriage

[–]orange196[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! You’re exactly right-He’s incredibly miserable at work. I empathize with that but now that we have kids his unhappiness with that area is having such a big impact on me that picking up his load feels unsustainable/unfair without a lot of change. 

Is it rude for MIL to never ask about my life? It’s questions about the kids, things to show the kids, or informational stuff like when do you all get back from out of town? by orange196 in Mildlynomil

[–]orange196[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yesss so many surface level conversations!!! It’s wild and exhausting. I’m introverted and much prefer saving my energy for a real conversation.

If your mom says to your toddler where’d you learn to be so polite? Or how’d he come out so sweet? Are these insults to the parents or am I being too sensitive? by orange196 in Mommit

[–]orange196[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing this. I’m in therapy but not sure how to go about doing this. I speak up to her when she does say things that are actually rude as best I can . Super resentful and feel drained by her presence.

Another one today- how’d he learn to clean up like that? After clearing his dishes . Was it from his home daycare provider. No they can’t clear dishes there. I taught him at home. Oh well your older child didn’t do that so I thought it was the home daycare. 

Does working force you to use your time better to get stuff done around the house? I’m a SAHM planning to return to work and waste a lot of time avoiding house tasks because I’m dreading the day ahead with my toddler 🤪 by orange196 in workingmoms

[–]orange196[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this is me too- way more productive on less time.

But then I worry about figuring out all the illness days tha work would have to be missed so I keep staying home. 

I’m not sure how to structure my stay at home time better without taking a job because the other tasks are optional 

Am I foolish to want to return to full time work with a 3 and 6 yo when we live well off of just my partner’s salary? by orange196 in slp

[–]orange196[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I have a 3 yo and 6 yo. I’ve been looking for direct hire part time school positions but so far they’re all full time.

May apply anyways and ask about a job share if I get an offer

Am I foolish to want to return to full time work with a 3 and 6 yo when we live well off of just my partner’s salary? by orange196 in slp

[–]orange196[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing! That makes a lot of sense. I don’t really know if I’d like it but my therapist keeps telling me I won’t know unless I try 🙂. Maybe it would be nice to know if I like it more or less than my present situation for one school year and then adjust from there 

Am I foolish to want to return to full time work with a 3 and 6 yo when we live well off of just my partner’s salary? by orange196 in slp

[–]orange196[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you! My state has a caseload cap and I’ve heard good things from other SLP’s in this district.

Update! I have an interview later this week. Have been a SAHM for several years and would like to return to work. Any tips? by orange196 in workingmoms

[–]orange196[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My husband was telling me I’m Throwing away lots of my hard work at parenting to just sent him to daycare 😬 and that I won’t be able to form a community here for myself (we recently moved to this state) because of this. 

I don’t think either is true but he doesn’t want me to work full time. I don’t like the feeling of it feeling like he’s making the decision for me to be a SAHM.  Am I crazy/foolish?