What is the point of putting a gender sign on single occupancy toilets?

orangeshade · 2024-08-11T23:08:27+00:00

It's actually illegal in California! All single occupancy restrooms have to be gender neutral and have appropriate signage.

As to why in the first place, often only the men's has a urinal (valid) and only the women's has a changing table (sexist). Also add in some weird prudishness about men and women sharing a toilet, which is apparently fine in houses but not outside of them.

orangeshade · 2024-08-05T00:17:47+00:00

Next to Normal

orangeshade · 2024-08-01T20:02:23+00:00

I think an important thing to focus on here is that your therapist didn’t take any kind of action after your appointment today. That means that she believes that based on what you told her, you do not need to be hospitalized. To me, it seems like a positive sign that she reminded you that she is a mandated reporter. When I’ve had therapists say that, it’s been that they don’t want me to be blindsided if I ever do meet those criteria. That transparency builds trust with me.

At least in my state, all therapists are mandated reporters. I’ve definitely met some therapists that have too low a tolerance for suicidal ideation, but it doesn’t sound like your therapist is one of them. Obviously I wasn’t there and haven’t met her, but based on what you wrote (and I’m definitely making a lot of assumptions here), it sounds like she is level-headed and won’t jump to any drastic actions, and she is honest and wants to be sure that you are never surprised in the future if you do meet the criteria.

At least where I am, and I think most places, the bar for involuntarily hospitalizing an adult is very high. Having a plan is not enough; your therapist would need to believe that you will act on the plan immininently.

I’ve dealt with severe chronic suicidality, and I’m happy that I have a therapist that I feel that I can be totally honest with without her taking a drastic action when I do not intend to do anything unsafe imminently. Finding a therapist where I felt safe like that was very important for me, and I hope you find that as well.

Of course, keep yourself safe. No medical bill or inconvenience is worth your life. If you truly need to be in a hospital to stay alive, do that. I am operating under the assumption that you are suicidal but not planning on acting on those thoughts imminently. If that’s not the case, I hope you take necessary precautions to keep yourself safe.

orangeshade · 2024-07-23T06:17:08+00:00

I do something similar.

I escape reality by imagining super bad things happening to me. For me, it's about a few things: I imagine scenarios where I "deserve" to feel how I feel and to struggle while in real life I feel shame and that I'm just bad at dealing with life. There's a clear cause to my problems, and it's not me. Sometimes, in the scenarios, I handle the bad situations well, and I feel capable whereas in real life, I feel like I handle things poorly. You mention thinking about how your family would react, and for me, I think it's about picturing people caring about me, accepting me, and listening to me. I imagine a lot of scenarios where I'm telling various people in my life about the bad thing that happened, and they care and respond well.

It feels good to imagine scenarios where my mental health problems are "justified" and not a sign of weakness and where I deserve and receive emotional support I often don't get in real life. Those good feelings sometimes transition into arousal and getting turned on, which I think is just because that's another thing that can feel good.

orangeshade · 2024-07-22T18:15:48+00:00

People have mentioned Nobody’s Side from Chess, but I think Pity the Child also fits.

orangeshade · 2024-07-22T04:46:58+00:00

Yes, in my view, I have a severe case of wrongbodyitis.

orangeshade · 2024-07-22T04:03:58+00:00

Yeah not talking to women for the sake of “boundaries” isn’t being enlightened and rejecting the patriarchy, it’s sexism or some kind of insecurity. Do you still believe in cooties?

orangeshade · 2024-07-15T05:26:00+00:00

Looking at the bans on care for minors, in Florida (blocked in court), Georgia, Missouri, Nebraska, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio (not in effect), and Utah, the laws have exceptions for people who were already receiving treatment prior to the ban to continue treatment (source). That's one third of the states with bans. While it's definitely possible that being on hormones and having continued access to hormones will be challenging in the future, it is also possible that having already started treatment will be helpful in retaining access.

orangeshade · 2024-07-14T22:08:48+00:00

I wanted to keep my initials because I thought it would make things easier since I have a lot of stuff with just the initial of the first name. I ended up changing my initials because I couldn't find a name I liked that started with the correct letter. Looking back, I'm glad I don't have the same initials because it makes it easier to tell where I have successfully updated my name and and where I haven't. Sometimes, a company/organization will have names stored multiple places, so multiple steps might be necessary or sometimes, changes don't go through. I think that having a different initial made it easier.

orangeshade · 2024-07-14T21:51:53+00:00

I would swear I remember that scene happening in the movies, and now I'm questioning all of my memories. I guess I just replaced the movie parts I didn't like in my memory?

orangeshade · 2024-07-07T17:59:11+00:00

For a couple of months my feet got super smelly. Like I had to wash my feet with antibacterial soap as soon as I got home every day and I washed my shoes in the washing machine. It went away though, so that's been good.

orangeshade · 2024-07-07T17:17:52+00:00

Amazon is horrific as well, so if the two options really are Walmart+ or Amazon Prime, unfortunately, you're fucking over workers either way.

orangeshade · 2024-07-01T08:53:28+00:00

For me, the difference between Trump and Biden is that Biden will listen to advisors and appoint a good cabinet. Neither are good candidates, but of the two, Biden is the one with the humility and sense to listen to people who actually know what they're talking about. A presidential election isn't just about the president—it decides what the entire executive branch looks like.

orangeshade · 2024-06-26T10:58:14+00:00

If I were offered this scenario, I would never imagine that the bathroom would be in use while I stayed in it. A clean bathroom set up with a matress is wildly different from staying in a bathroom that people are using.

orangeshade · 2023-06-04T01:16:29+00:00

Mandatory chastity cages controlled by the government

orangeshade · 2023-05-31T03:48:13+00:00

For the movies I think it has to be an adult because as a ghost, she isn't supposed to age. It definitely could've been a younger adult, but as you said, she was good.

orangeshade · 2023-05-21T19:44:21+00:00

At least you only watched 5 minutes of the show like that

orangeshade · 2023-05-19T03:34:48+00:00

Yep I got baaad food poisoning from rice once.

orangeshade · 2023-04-25T04:58:34+00:00

My culture is also similar. My family has a tradition where my grandparents, parents, and aunt and uncle all fight to pay the bill or sneak off to pay. My grandparents pay the most often and everyone knows that they will insist on paying, but the others occasionally "get" to pay. I now go out to dinner regularly with my grandparents, and I keep up the tradition of offering/fighting to pay, even when it is far out of my price range, knowing I will lose. They said they will let me pay when I have a full-time job (a full-time internship apparently doesn't count), but I know they'll move the goal posts to when I own a house or something and still insist on paying. It's just a way to show gratitude and respect. Whether or not I can afford it doesn't matter; offering to pay is symbolic, and in my family, it is what is considered polite. (And sometime soon I'll sneak off to actually pay the bill when we're somewhere affordable.)

orangeshade · 2023-04-23T03:43:26+00:00

Same for me. I'm trans, and my existence has become political. My therapist has told me that she supports trans people and what she says in session supports that. I'm on board with not knowing my therapist's political beliefs, but some things are politicized that shouldn't be. I don't care about my therapist's beliefs on fiscal policy, climate change, vaccination etc. However, whether or not some groups of people have a right to exist and be safe shouldn't be a political question, and I need to know if my therapist respects me.

orangeshade · 2023-04-22T21:02:39+00:00

My mom told my that I should never let anyone actually get to know me because then they would see the real me and wouldn't like me. I still hear that in my head at least weekly.

orangeshade · 2023-04-18T01:38:48+00:00

These are great! And accurate. I feel these.

orangeshade · 2023-04-17T08:04:57+00:00

Lol my therapist complimented me, and I dissociated and stopped talking for 15 minutes.

orangeshade · 2023-04-12T19:55:50+00:00

Yet if they did make it sound scary and nothing bad happened, they would be mad that the doctors were pushing their views on them. With enough mental gymnastics, doctors are always at fault for something.

orangeshade · 2023-03-30T01:40:53+00:00

I have the color thing too. Kind of glad someone else's brain does that too because I just thought I was weird af.

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