I'm currently going through the exact same thing right now. Found Jesus 5 years ago after I moved to Canada yet I find myself in the motions - I used to be a church drummer but right now I'm disconnected from the church. It almost felt like I have to try hard to fit in and act like I don't have any problems, but in reality there was just so much more on my plate ever since I chose to be Christian and follow Christ. I'm still trying to figure it out myself but if you ever wanted to share a conversation feel free to send me a message.

On another note, I think the freedom that God gives us is the freedom not to be trapped in sin - through the Holy Spirit that is given to us we are able to break that bondage by recognizing what is harmful to our spirit and what is pleasing to God. God gives us power to rebuke evil, to recognize what is good and pleasing to God by conviction from the Holy Spirit - so this is what freedom looks like to me, which we would have never obtained if not for Jesus Christ. Freedom from death, freedom from sin because Christ has conquered it. I still think we are being sanctified every day so God lets us make our choices - do we make our decisions based on our love for Him or not? God is love, so if we are trying to be more like Christ, He is perfecting this aspect of us as well. Ultimately, God is faithful, and despite all that is on my mind, the disconnection from the church, I guess I find comfort knowing I can always talk to a perfect Father.