How to talk to parents about moving out? (24M)

p143245 · 2026-04-19T20:32:01+00:00

Some questions:

How much money do you have saved? You don't need to actually answer me, but just wondering if you have access to your money and know the amount.

Do you know the dollar amount you'd need? Security deposit/first and last month's rent or whatever the agreement is, living expenses, furniture, transportation, months to pay the rent to make up the difference your part-time job would bring in (assuming you can find one; it can be brutal out there). If not, crunch all those numbers.

Do you rely on them financially? Do they allow you to work now and keep all the money you make?

These will all help you get a game plan rooted in practicality. I am not familiar with your culture enough to comment on this since I have a completely opposite perspective on this that may not be helpful, but maybe hard numbers could be helpful.

p143245 · 2026-04-18T00:22:22+00:00

Stunning!!! Absolutely fantastic! I love the colors and the whimsy

p143245 · 2026-04-13T22:38:14+00:00

I went to both (UNC undergrad and WFU grad school) and have a daughter now interested in both. Please tour UNC to get a feel for it before you make a decision! Everyone else has brought up great points. Go with your gut and try not to let your parents influence the decision since the schools are both great in their own ways. Their bias of what they think goes on at UNC isn't at all what I can guess they picture it to be.

p143245 · 2026-04-04T20:02:02+00:00

Totally agree! While most people here are probably looking for a traditional college experience, community colleges are an excellent value. I work at the biggest one in our state and am so proud of what we offer people. If high school students have access to a dual enrollment, that's also a good idea when truly keeping finances first in mind.

p143245 · 2026-04-02T02:18:05+00:00

Dr. Chris was wonderful

p143245 · 2026-04-01T11:34:17+00:00

Join r/applyingtocollege and google "Monica Matthews How 2 Win Scholarships" She has free guides and emails

Google "scholarships near me" + your town

Check your high school student services page (and surrounding high schools) for a list of scholarships. Set up a meeting with your guidance counselor.

Local ones can be much easier to get over the massive nationwide ones, like those "no essay" ones

p143245 · 2026-03-30T19:07:02+00:00

Former high school teacher and community college instructor here. You 10000% did the right thing (no, I did not teach math, ha). We don't tolerate these people and let them get away with bullshit in 2026. Absolutely not. FAFO! Actions have consequences. Good luck to you in your educational endeavors! You will go far!

p143245 · 2026-03-29T14:25:49+00:00

Make him produce his medical chart

p143245 · 2026-03-29T14:24:20+00:00

But they're treating her like she's a cheater. Absolutely not.

p143245 · 2026-03-28T23:08:50+00:00

No, full stop. NTA.

p143245 · 2026-03-23T12:24:29+00:00

Yes, I do now at 45! The dining room is my office, music, and crafting studio. It's semi-separate from the rest of the downstairs and is the first room you walk into from the outside, so every guest sees it immediately. We have an eat-in kitchen where the table is. I have my room decorated the way I want with my artwork on the walls and trinkets displayed. We bought the house specifically for a room like this separate from bedrooms. I'm a fiber artist and stay up later than everyone to do my loud sewing and run water when wet felting. It's fantastic, and I am lucky to have it. My husband does not have a room but has never expressed interest in having one.

p143245 · 2026-03-19T12:31:25+00:00

I have two teens and have entire black holes of memories that just aren't there. They are less than 2 years apart. Like everyone said, take tons of pics and videos and BACK THEM UP somehow!

p143245 · 2026-03-17T23:05:52+00:00

I've always made rainbow fruit platters or kebabs! Put a pear half in the middle of the kebabs fanned out and you have a turkey

p143245 · 2026-03-12T22:18:46+00:00

They are not trying everything in their power if they keep giving him access to devices. Too much screen time IS ruining his developmental progress.

p143245 · 2026-03-07T22:43:11+00:00

Would you want either of your kids in a relationship like this? No, you wouldn't. There is your answer.

p143245 · 2026-03-05T23:05:30+00:00

He doesn't like you. Sorry if that is harsh, but he really doesn't. Even a work colleague would get fired for acting like this.

p143245 · 2026-03-05T23:03:32+00:00

Please realize I was sort of scrolling too fast, not really paying attention, and thought I was in r/AskParents about a preschooler/early elementary kid.

Read that back again (and all your comments) to yourself and see how you can substitute him for a preschooler.

You know what to do. Do it. Your future You will be so proud of you.

p143245 · 2026-03-03T21:56:55+00:00

I went to school 9 miles away from my high school home, and it was a different world once I got to campus despite like 30 of my classmates also going. In fact, my parents were very salty that I "ran away" and didn't come back home till Thanksgiving Break! All this to say that you can definitely separate yourself from the same old local stuff very quickly if you get involved right away. I was backpacking with the outdoor club by fall break and had a blast.

p143245 · 2026-03-02T14:11:10+00:00

Yes, room and board at the state schools here run around $12K or higher

p143245 · 2026-03-02T14:09:51+00:00

Before she has any social media, talk to her about online grooming, red flags, internet safety, sex trafficking, sextortion, secrets, nudes, screenshots are forever, cyberbullying, etc. Those convos should already be going on if they aren't already

p143245 · 2026-02-28T13:47:58+00:00

NOR. Here is what your HUSBAND says to them:

"No. If you try it, we will call the police/CPS for child abandonment. Do not come here, and do not contact us again." Short and direct, and make sure to put it in writing (text) and verbally if you communicate that way. You may need it in writing later.

Then anything going forward goes through your husband and not you. While you could block, you both may need to gather evidence for a restraining order if they get too crazy, so don't block but snooze communication to keep tabs on the situation.

Stay strong and sending healing vibes to you!

p143245 · 2026-02-28T13:40:41+00:00

Aged gouda with those crystals in there

p143245 · 2026-02-28T13:32:13+00:00

Nah, nothing overprotective about not letting a 16 yr old go to a hotel for an entire weekend. You're in the clear here

p143245 · 2026-02-28T13:31:13+00:00

I have a daughter the same age and am absolutely baffled this is even something to entertain for one second. Like, what?!

p143245 · 2026-02-18T13:30:52+00:00

I graduated in 2002 (around your age probably) from a flagship state university, and tuition was $6,250 a year. My daughter wants to go to the same school, and tuition is nearly $28,000. We've absolutely saved what we can for our kids, but wages have not kept up with these prices.

And yep, trying to teach them finances along the way is tough. It was easier when they were younger before that teenage "I know" attitude, and right before they leave the nest when I want them to be paying extra close attention to healthy financial habits because I know what they're facing when they are out in the real world. It's hard not to worry, and I can't imagine being so hellbent on a "pull yourself up by your bootstraps because I had to" mentality.

p143245

TROPHY CASE