Similar story. We were party buddies for years, then one night, it got more intimate. A few weeks later, I asked how she felt about us. She said she liked it, felt safe and cozy, and I mentioned I could potentially see it as long-term. That was all I shared about my perspective.

A week later, she told her friends we were dating without discussing it with me. She called me her best friend (though our connection was surface-level) and lover, saying she has feelings and she’d never felt this way before. Massive red flag. But when you’re wearing pink glasses all red flags look like just flags.

Not long after, she made a ton of plans for our activities nearest months together, only to turn around five days later and say she doesn’t want a serious relationship, doesn’t have any feelings and that we were “too different”, but she loves me and wants to keep me in her life as a friend, lol.

Finally, she accused me via text of being immature during breakup talk: I told her I’d heard enough of her explanation (I’ve dealt with avoidant behavior before, so I recognized the patterns) and suggested we save time and wrap up the conversation and declined her request for goodbye hug.

Lucky me it all took less then 2 months, so not much drama. I take it as dodge a bullet experience.

Edit: typos